Am I crazy for feeling like this?

trevess

So, we are taking a big family trip to the Delaware coast in a few weeks and SIL insists on driving with DH, baby & I.  I have a few issues with this:

1) I would really like to drive with just DH & I

2) Baby has a LOT of stuff that we have to bring- and I don't know how we're going to fit all of it, let alone another body and SIL's stuff, too

3) SIL is a SMOKER!!!

I have spoken to DH about her going with us on numerous occasions (so much so that now it is a very sore subject and we honestly probably won't even go if I bring it up again).  DH says he wants her to go bc he "feels bad for her" (she isn't speaking with any of her 4 daughters right now- loooong story).  Tonight as I spoke to her on the phone I said, "I'm sure you know about the no smoking on the trip,"  and she was like, "WHAT?  I don't know if I can make it that long without one!  I guess I'll have to get a patch or something!"  (Insert annoyed tone and eye rolling on the other end of the line)

What I WANTED to say was, "Well, this is our family vacation and if you don't want to play by my rules so you can ride with us, then ride with someone else!!"  (There are several other cars going that she could ride in).  What I REALLY said was, "Well, you know, with the baby and being enclosed in a car for 12 hours..."

Am I being crazy here?  Even if we didn't have H, I wouldn't want to smell that crap the whole trip!  (I apologize if anyone is a smoker, I just personally can't stand smoke- like, not even a little!)  WHY ME?!?!?!

Sangria to all who read that!

Ashleysred

People aren't allowed to smoke in my car with or without baby.  So with that said, I don't think you're being crazy.  Stand your ground sister!

CanadianBride84

I am so happy Ontario now bans smoking in vehicles that have children under 16 in them.

I would probably tell her that there might not be room for her in the car with you guys and that she might wanan look for someone else to ride with, as the baby will take up a lot of room. 

Kahtie41

I don't think you're crazy at all.  It's your car, your rules.  Besides, if you make the personal choice to smoke, you HAVE to know that it's not a good idea to do so in such close quarters with an infant.  She can get over it or get in another car.

ash.flea

AR also has a law against smoking in a car with children.  Maybe your state does as well?

I cannot stand smoking and wouldn't want to ride with a smoker for 12 hours even if they didn't smoke in the car.  The smoke on their clothes is enough to make my allergies & asthma flare up.  Add in a baby and there is no way I would even consider it.

trevess

Update: Just talked to DH and he is totally in agreement with me (Thank God).

I should have added that I don't even want her smoking when we make stops because of the nasty smell clinging to her clothes.  (Plus we have a BRAND new car!)

**Ashley- I knew you would agree on this one!  ;-)

MelVic

Stand your ground woman!!! I think you need to tell her nicely...I honestly do not know how much room there will be in the car with all of the baby stuff along with mine and DH stuff, and I do not want you to be uncomfortable for the long drive, and..

Of course, that unfortunately you do not want any smoking in the car...Think about it Carollyn, even if she does not smoke in the car..her things will smell of smoke and inturn all of your things will along with Hayden's.....

If there are other ppl driving there I do not see why DH would mind if she goes with someone else, it is one thing if you were her only ride, but you are not!!!

Good Luck girl..... 

MelVic

Okay just read your update after I posted lol.....so glad DH is with you on this!!

Wendells

Hell no you're not crazy!  I'm right there with you.  My SIL is a smoker too and it drives me crazy when she comes over and brings that smell into our house.  I hope she quits for good now that she's PG.

MrsBlayne

It drives menuts when people take breaks at work and come back just reeking of smoke. The smell really bothers me, and I don't think you should be forced to be cooped up in acar with it! Did she invite herself to ride with you?

natalee215

You are not crazy at all!  I'm so glad that DH is in agreement with you on this.  Now you can stand your ground together.  The best excuse really is that there isn't room.  Between H in her car seat and all of the stuff that you're going to need to bring for her, there really won't be room for another person! 

I can't stand the smell of smoke that lingers on people so much more than the smell of someone actually smoking.  It's like stale, stagnant smoke.  Gross!  So if she were to get out for smoke breaks and back in the car, that's the smell that you'd be riding with the whole trip.

LMJacobs23

I agree with PP stand your ground!!! I'm not pregnant (yet) and don't have kids and I don't allow people to smoke in my car either! And you're right I dont want them coming in after smoking bc it's still on their clothes!!!!

 

P.S. what beach in Delaware are you going to?! I'm from there

Buttercup29

Ashleysred:

People aren't allowed to smoke in my car with or without baby.  So with that said, I don't think you're being crazy.  Stand your ground sister!

I totally agree.

Ms.Beachbum08

Maybe you should tell her that you tried packing the car up to see how much room is left and that there really isn't any room for an additional passenger.  You definitely don't need any stinkiness in your car for 12 hours.

trevess

LMJacobs23:

I agree with PP stand your ground!!! I'm not pregnant (yet) and don't have kids and I don't allow people to smoke in my car either! And you're right I dont want them coming in after smoking bc it's still on their clothes!!!!

 

P.S. what beach in Delaware are you going to?! I'm from there

We're going to Bethany Beach!  DH's fam has a house there.  This will be our 3rd trip to the area- I love it there!  I crack up at the farmside stands that say, "Corn, 1$ for 5 ears, leave your $ in the bucket!"

Rhobeth (sp?) is my fav for the shops and restaurants.  Everyone raves about Ocean City but I could take it or leave it...to me it is kinda dirty! (Although Seacrets is a MUST-stop for us!)

natalee215

trevess:

LMJacobs23:

P.S. what beach in Delaware are you going to?! I'm from there

We're going to Bethany Beach!  DH's fam has a house there.  This will be our 3rd trip to the area- I love it there!  I crack up at the farmside stands that say, "Corn, 1$ for 5 ears, leave your $ in the bucket!"

Rhobeth (sp?) is my fav for the shops and restaurants.  Everyone raves about Ocean City but I could take it or leave it...to me it is kinda dirty! (Although Seacrets is a MUST-stop for us!)

I love Rehobeth, too.  I'm not sure if you know, but it's a notoriously gay friendly town.  I went on vacation with my gay friends once and had the best time!  They have great stores and restaurants.  It's a very family friendly town, too. 

Ocean City, MD is fun, but it's a totally different scene there.  Our friends have a house down there so we get down there at least once a summer, but that's more of a party weekend for us.  Seacrets makes some great frozen cocktails for afternoon drinking!  Something tells me that we won't be making down there this year...

FutureMrs.McC

natalee215:

trevess:

LMJacobs23:

P.S. what beach in Delaware are you going to?! I'm from there

We're going to Bethany Beach!  DH's fam has a house there.  This will be our 3rd trip to the area- I love it there!  I crack up at the farmside stands that say, "Corn, 1$ for 5 ears, leave your $ in the bucket!"

Rhobeth (sp?) is my fav for the shops and restaurants.  Everyone raves about Ocean City but I could take it or leave it...to me it is kinda dirty! (Although Seacrets is a MUST-stop for us!)

I love Rehobeth, too.  I'm not sure if you know, but it's a notoriously gay friendly town.  I went on vacation with my gay friends once and had the best time!  They have great stores and restaurants.  It's a very family friendly town, too. 

Ocean City, MD is fun, but it's a totally different scene there.  Our friends have a house down there so we get down there at least once a summer, but that's more of a party weekend for us.  Seacrets makes some great frozen cocktails for afternoon drinking!  Something tells me that we won't be making down there this year...

I think you have to have been raised on Ocean City to truly appreciate it.  It's probably my favorite place in the world.  Give me some Thrashers fries and an afternoon floating and drinking at Seacrets and I'm a happy girl.  With a baby though, not so appealing.  We'll be there next weekend

trevess

FutureMrs.McC:

natalee215:

trevess:

LMJacobs23:

P.S. what beach in Delaware are you going to?! I'm from there

We're going to Bethany Beach!  DH's fam has a house there.  This will be our 3rd trip to the area- I love it there!  I crack up at the farmside stands that say, "Corn, 1$ for 5 ears, leave your $ in the bucket!"

Rhobeth (sp?) is my fav for the shops and restaurants.  Everyone raves about Ocean City but I could take it or leave it...to me it is kinda dirty! (Although Seacrets is a MUST-stop for us!)

I love Rehobeth, too.  I'm not sure if you know, but it's a notoriously gay friendly town.  I went on vacation with my gay friends once and had the best time!  They have great stores and restaurants.  It's a very family friendly town, too. 

Ocean City, MD is fun, but it's a totally different scene there.  Our friends have a house down there so we get down there at least once a summer, but that's more of a party weekend for us.  Seacrets makes some great frozen cocktails for afternoon drinking!  Something tells me that we won't be making down there this year...

I think you have to have been raised on Ocean City to truly appreciate it.  It's probably my favorite place in the world.  Give me some Thrashers fries and an afternoon floating and drinking at Seacrets and I'm a happy girl.  With a baby though, not so appealing.  We'll be there next weekend

Thrashers fries- YES!!!  And we used to always hit up the hippie sandwich shop across from Seacrets on our way home (you know the one with the Grateful Dead bears?), but I have a feeling that tradition will be broken this year.  But Seacrets during the day for a Pain in the a$$ for sure!!! And, I can't forget about Hoopers Crab House.  Pretty excited for that!