On "trying to have a medicated birth"

AshasaurusRex

I did go natural, so when talking to pregnant women who ultimately know they'll end up with an epidural but don't want to admit it to me, I get a lot of "I'll try to go natural" I feel like they think I'll judge them if they don't.

superMiller

I have changed my rhetoric to "I am planning a natural birth." (Is that just a fancy "try??")  I have Lupus and several other health issues that are going to be difficult to navigate.  (In my case Lupus has caused fluid build up in all of my major organs, and scar tissue in my chest, causing breathing difficulties.  Lupus causes different reactions in every case, many of which have little effect on child birth.  Seeing as how this is my first pregnancy, I have no idea what to expect from my body.)   But I feel like I have to keep an open mind and not be too "stubborn" when the time comes.  DH and I are looking into a doula because I need someone on my side to tell me if and when I've taken things too far.  But primarily someone to tell the HOSPITAL staff when to back off if things are proceeding perfectly fine and they're just trying to cover their a$$es.  I'm really riding that fine line where I don't want to sabotage my own birth experience, but ultimately I want to do whatever will bring this kiddo safely into the world.  

mh2t

Carilyn:

I know what you mean.  I get the same feeling when people say they're going to "try" to breastfeed.  You've got to be determined or you'll quit.

Totally agree!

smilelari

Rach03k:

I have something I want to add - you know, some people really are just trying, and they're ok with that. You can put me in that category. I just wanted to get as far as I could get. I'm really happy I went as long as I did without an epi - to me it was an amazing, exhilarating experience. I'm also glad I got the epi when I did because you know what? I wanted to take a nap.

The way that whole post and this whole thread is framed, is as if getting an epidural at some point during labor is some sort of failure, one which we should all be going to great lengths to avoid. I reject that. There are definitely good reasons to opt against medications during labor, but none so compelling that women should be made to feel like less if they just want to give it a go and see what happens. None that make getting pain medication a *bad* choice. 

I didn't mean to be judgmental at all.  I just thought it was an interesting blog post - one that I happen to agree with. There is nothing wrong with going in, saying, "I'm going to try to go natural" especially if you have no problem with getting the epi.  I was pretty opposed to getting any drugs for childbirth and for most people, if you want to come out at the end without any drugs, you need to do more than just try

It just depends on whether your mindset is "I am adamantly opposed to the epi" or "it would be nice to go without but it's there if I need it".  Neither is wrong or bad, but those are 2 completely different visions of childbirth and if you fall into the first group, some preparation is necessary. And on a natural childbirth board, I would expect that most posters fall into category #2.

rels09

First off, I am not even PG yet, so you can feel free to throw everything I say completely out the window if you want to. I lurk here because we are in the early stages of planning. I am going to need to change my health insurance provider soon if I want to have the best chance of going natural, so I like to read about my options, and there has been a baby boom around us lately, so it has been on my mind a lot. I just wanted to offer another perspective on this.

I plan to do everything in my power to ensure that if I am able to have a vaginal birth, it is a natural one. I am switching my insurance solely to be able to get the best provider for this, and I plan to take classes, etc. when the time comes. However, I am also fully aware that I was a breech baby (as my mother's first), as was my uncle (my maternal grandmother's first child). Many medical studies have shown that there is a strong genetic link to (particularly first) babies being breech. So while I plan to do everything I can to have a natural birth, I have to also prepare myself for the possibility that my baby may turn breech and stay there - it's not all up to me. If I weren't realistic about this possibility, I am the type of person who could get very disappointed, because I am such a stubborn person.

So basically, I totally agree with KateLouise that what a person means when they say "I want" is more revealing. However, having run a marathon, I also appreciate that analogy. I ended up hurting my knee a week before the race, and while I was able to finish, I could not qualify for Boston like I had prepared to do. Still, training and finishing itself was a rewarding experience.

smilelari

rels09:

First off, I am not even PG yet, so you can feel free to throw everything I say completely out the window if you want to. I lurk here because we are in the early stages of planning. I am going to need to change my health insurance provider soon if I want to have the best chance of going natural, so I like to read about my options, and there has been a baby boom around us lately, so it has been on my mind a lot. I just wanted to offer another perspective on this.

I plan to do everything in my power to ensure that if I am able to have a vaginal birth, it is a natural one. I am switching my insurance solely to be able to get the best provider for this, and I plan to take classes, etc. when the time comes. However, I am also fully aware that I was a breech baby (as my mother's first), as was my uncle (my maternal grandmother's first child). Many medical studies have shown that there is a strong genetic link to (particularly first) babies being breech. So while I plan to do everything I can to have a natural birth, I have to also prepare myself for the possibility that my baby may turn breech and stay there - it's not all up to me. If I weren't realistic about this possibility, I am the type of person who could get very disappointed, because I am such a stubborn person.

So basically, I totally agree with KateLouise that what a person means when they say "I want" is more revealing. However, having run a marathon, I also appreciate that analogy. I ended up hurting my knee a week before the race, and while I was able to finish, I could not qualify for Boston like I had prepared to do. Still, training and finishing itself was a rewarding experience.

Sort of off topic, but it is possible to have a vaginal breech birth if you find the right provider.  In fact, with the right provider that has better outcomes than a c-section

disbride061103

smilelari:

rels09:

First off, I am not even PG yet, so you can feel free to throw everything I say completely out the window if you want to. I lurk here because we are in the early stages of planning. I am going to need to change my health insurance provider soon if I want to have the best chance of going natural, so I like to read about my options, and there has been a baby boom around us lately, so it has been on my mind a lot. I just wanted to offer another perspective on this.

I plan to do everything in my power to ensure that if I am able to have a vaginal birth, it is a natural one. I am switching my insurance solely to be able to get the best provider for this, and I plan to take classes, etc. when the time comes. However, I am also fully aware that I was a breech baby (as my mother's first), as was my uncle (my maternal grandmother's first child). Many medical studies have shown that there is a strong genetic link to (particularly first) babies being breech. So while I plan to do everything I can to have a natural birth, I have to also prepare myself for the possibility that my baby may turn breech and stay there - it's not all up to me. If I weren't realistic about this possibility, I am the type of person who could get very disappointed, because I am such a stubborn person.

So basically, I totally agree with KateLouise that what a person means when they say "I want" is more revealing. However, having run a marathon, I also appreciate that analogy. I ended up hurting my knee a week before the race, and while I was able to finish, I could not qualify for Boston like I had prepared to do. Still, training and finishing itself was a rewarding experience.

Sort of off topic, but it is possible to have a vaginal breech birth if you find the right provider.  In fact, with the right provider that has better outcomes than a c-section

While it's possible to have a vaginal breech birth, it is actually quite difficult.  First you have to find a provider who is actually trained to do it and then one who has done enough of them for you to be comfortable going that route.  Add to that, your baby needs to be frank breech with their head tucked (it's extremely dangerous to deliver any other type of breech babies and a lot of frank breech babies don't have their chins tucked).  All of these factors can make it almost impossible to deliver a breech baby vaginally.

And back on topic, to the poster who said that those who try to bf will wind up with a formula fed baby, I'm sure you will be quite shocked to know that I "tried" to bf and my son never had a drop of formula.  He was efb for 5 1/2 months and then when he self weaned at 9 1/2 months, I continued to pump so that he would receive breast milk until he was over a year old.  Not too shabby for someone who just "tried."