Multiples

I decided to do what is best for us.. (bottle/breastfeeding related)

I have been putting myself under so much stress trying to make myself tandem feed the twins.  I know they are only a week and a half old, but i felt like if i didn't breastfeed solely that somehow i wasn't a good Mom or something.  I really don't like to tandem feed.  Not sure if it is because they are so little, but it is hard to get them on, get them positioned, try to get them off, burped, etc. all while trying to take care of two older toddlers.  Anyway, i have been pumping and giving bottles and nursing them individually when i can.  It is working for me.  I cannot feel guilty about that.  All in all, to me.. all that matters is they are getting breastmilk.  The only issue i am having is i was totally engorged a few days ago, and now.. completely soft all the time.  It is so weird.  Anyway, just wanted to share.

Re: I decided to do what is best for us.. (bottle/breastfeeding related)

  • I plan on breast feeding my girls and I can't wrap my head around the thought of tandem feeding. I breast fed three out of four of my other children, so the actual act doesn't bother me. I have watched videos of women tandem feeding and it seems like so much work. I would rather go back and forth between bottle feeding breast milk and breast feeding. But no matter what you continue to do or change, you are not a bad mom if breast feeding doesn't work out. Your feeding your children that is what needs to happen, not which way you do it. Good luck with feeding times!!!
  • It is hard to get the hang of... especially when you have 2 older ones added in to the equation!  Don't feel bad at all.  Pumping and bottle feeding for twins is no easy task either ; ) You're a Supermom for keeping up with it!
    ~Crystal~ SAHM to Sam (5), Hugh (3), Mary & Grace (22 months) : )
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  • I never liked to tandem myself and it always seemed that I'd get one latched on, go to get the other one, and the first one would come off.  You have to do what is best for your family and you as the mom.  As long as they get some BM I think you are good.  I pumped for 3 mos because for us bottle feeding them was just easier and better.  You do what works for you!!
  • To me, I would think that if you can get them to latch well, tandem-feeding is a lot less work than pumping and bottle-feeding. But then, I HATED pumping and didn't have older kids to contend with (though in terms of chasing after other kids, it seems just as hard while attached to a pump?). But at any rate, I know it's a very personal decision and you do whatever you can to survive! Sounds like you are doing an amazing job of balancing it all!
    fraternal twin boys born january 2009
  • kegkeg member
    Definitely do what works for you and your family.  However, I will say that I didn't have much luck tandem feeding until they were about a month old.  So, even if you go with this plan, you may want to go back and try tandem feeding in a couple weeks when they are less floppy.  If you can get it to work, tandem feeding is much easier than doing them individually or pumping.  Good luck!
    2004-Started TTC; Nov 2007-Lap with endo removed; Jan 2008-Ectopic (mtx); April 2008-IVF #1 (bfp, twin girls); March 2011-FET (cp); June 2012-IVF #2 (bfp, singleton, EDD 3-19-12)

    ***Twin fraternal girls born at 35w6d in 12/2008***

  • Don't be hard on yourself. My babies have been getting 99% breastmilk since birth, but they only started being able to nurse around their due date, and just this week started getting better at tandem nursing. They were mostly ok at alternating between breast and bottle, although sometimes they prefer the bottle b/c it's easier. Give it time, and in the meantime, just keep giving them breastmilk however you can get it into them.

    I just did a blog post on the topic of tandem feeding...

    https://babiescubed.blogspot.com/

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  • i tried nursing while in the hospital with both my singleton and my twins - and it was going OK but then little things started to go wrong and I decided that I was going to EP. 

    I EP'd for Griffin for a little over 2 mos and only 4w for the twins b/c i simply didn't have enough time with 2 infants + toddler... but they got a month of my breast milk and that's what matters - even if they got none- as long as they were fed and happy that is the important thing!

    I think the media (and some women on message boards!) try to make others think they are bad moms if they don't nurse- for whatever reasons.  I never felt bad or guilt - I knew I was doing what was best for my boys by doing what was best for me and our situation.

    all 3 of my boys are happy healthy kids- that's all that matters!

    kellymom.com has info on EP'ing that is good - if you do decide to keep it up.  Make sure to pump enough - i didn't with the twins and got mastitis - and that SUCKS.  good luck!

  • I have not been tandem feeding, and it works for us.  The boys are still getting 99% breast milk (1 formula bottle for Asher if their needs suddenly jump up) and they seem quite happy!
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  • Tandem feeding is hard!  I did it in the hospital with very patient nurses but when I go home and my milk came in 10 mins after I walked in the door, I pumped for the 1st time and we gave the babies the expressed milk since I was so engorged.  I tried to tandem BF the next day but was tired and frustrated and ended up an EPer, which really works for us.  Don't feel guilty!  Do what's best for your and your family.  I can't imagine having twins + 2 toddlers, you're doing a great job!
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  • imagemacchiatto:
    To me, I would think that if you can get them to latch well, tandem-feeding is a lot less work than pumping and bottle-feeding. But then, I HATED pumping and didn't have older kids to contend with (though in terms of chasing after other kids, it seems just as hard while attached to a pump?).

    True that tandem feeding is much less time consuming!  But, with the older kids involved it's a toss up between which is harder (I do both).  Even though pumping takes more time start to finish (although the girls do eat bottles faster than they BF), tandem bf'ing with the older ones in the same room is hard because my younger son wants to be sitting with me (like, on top of the pillow!) and getting my attention at the same time.  And if I try to sit in the adjacent room I can't help diffuse fights or hug them if they get hurt.  I actually can do some things while I pump (check e-mail or this board, have a hand free for whatever the boys need),  and I can also prop the girls' bottles if one of the boys needs something. 

    Anyway, having the older kids definitely changes what I would want (or be able) to do if I just had the twins.  No matter what I do, I'm stretched too thin ; )

    ~Crystal~ SAHM to Sam (5), Hugh (3), Mary & Grace (22 months) : )
  • Good for you for doing what works for you. Often I think moms are so hell-bent on doing what you're "supposed" to do that they get stressed and that makes it harder on mom, babies, and the rest of the family. I wanted to tandem nurse but it was just too much stress. I switched to EPing. The girls will be 1 year old in 2 1/2 weeks and I'll finish pumping in 1 1/2 week. I have found that I can do quite a bit while pumping that I could not do if the girls were nursing. If it works for you, do it. GL.
  • Wow, thank you all so much for the encouragement. I went to the doctor today, and 12 days after birth my twins are back to their birth weights.  My pedi was so proud that i am able to give them breastmilk only, whether i nurse or give in a bottle.  I try to nurse them at least once a day, but honestly.. pumping takes 10 minutes.  Literally.  Breastfeeding takes a lot more time and with 2 toddlers i just don't have that.  i usually try to nurse them once the older ones go to bed.  I may try tandem feeding again when the twins are a bit older.  They are still very small.  Thank you all for the advice and in the end, i agree.. do whatever is best for your family and your children..
  • I have two little ones (3 and 1) and my new twins and its hard to juggle everyone! I pumped for the first 8 weeks (they were 6 weeks early) then transitioned over to full time nursing. It was kinda nice because they were on a good 3 hour schedule and they were decently fast nursers. Now at 14 weeks (8 adjusted) they nurse quicker than they eat a bottle (10 min tops nursing). Sometimes I tandem feed, sometimes I feed them one after the other. Pumping may be best for you guys- I wanted to bash my pump by the end of 8 weeks. Tandem will probably be much easier and less time consuming when they are a bit older. The great thing is its not all or nothing- have to decide now forever thing.
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