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I have an insensitive family

hersheykisshersheykiss
in Adoption

I posted about this on my local board, but I thought you ladies might like a little perspective from a BM on Mother's day.

My youngest sister called me yesterday to wish me a happy mothers day. She said, "Oh how is Emmalee, the sole reason you are able to celebrate today?" Ummmm WTF??

Now, I realize that she has been essentially brainwashed by my mother to not acknowledge K's existence and to act like the victim when K is brought up in conversation, but COME ON!!

You don't have to acknowledge her birth, but please don't ignore it. I may have chosen not to parent my child, but that does not give you (meaning my family) the right to say I am not a mother until I do parent a child. Sorry for the drama, I go through this basically every year with my family. My DH is wonderful, he has never thought like my family.

Please, for those of you who have been blessed by adopting, plan to adopt, or working towards the end goal of adopting, I beg you to please remember the birth families on special days like this. You don't have to do anything big, a simple prayer will do. :)

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Re: I have an insensitive family

  • julandjojulandjo member
    (((Hugs)))  What a horrible thing for her to say.  I'm sorry you have to deal with that.  I hope you had a nice Mother's Day despite their attempt to put you down.
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  • GLynn2009GLynn2009
    Aw, I am so sorry your family does not get it.
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  • Honeydew1894Honeydew1894
    :( That is really hurtful and unnecessary. I am sorry that she said that. In my opinion, doing the best thing for your child, whatever that may be, makes you a mom.
    Photobucket My Favorite Part of Spring~Red Sox Baseball!
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  • Go_DawgsGo_Dawgs member

    I'm so sorry.  That was a very offensive thing for your sister to say.

    Just know that there are so many of us out there who are incredibly thankful for women like you who are brave and selfless enough to make an adoption plan for their litlte one.  Birth moms like you were in all of our minds on Mother's Day!!

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  • FinallyMrs.GFinallyMrs.G
    Oh My! I'm so sorry. That's horrible. ((Hugs))
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  • CaptainSeriousCaptainSerious member
    It does sound like she went out of her way to be hurtful and let you know that she does not consider K your daughter.  I'm so sorry.
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  • mrsdrkwavermrsdrkwaver
    I agree it was very hurtfull and unnessary Hope you had a nice mothers day
    Proud Momma of our daughter Charlie! She found her forever home August 2010 Hope to be the proud momma of #2 in July
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  • so1966so1966
    just plain cruel and ignorant. so sorry.
    After 7 years of marriage and 5 unsuccessful IVFs, we have been granted the gift of adopting a baby boy, born 4/21/11.
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  • GulfCoasterGulfCoaster
    That's really cruel of her.  I'm sorry she's so insensitive.  *hugs*
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  • Art TeacherArt Teacher

    I'm so sorry that she treated you that way. 

     

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