Something out of the blue

Lorange-8

There is always something that brings me back down to when it happened.  I have been feeling so crappy lately.  I thought I was doing better.  Last night was pretty bad, I'm not going to be happy on Sunday but my sister's are having a get together so I'm not alone, AF came two days ago, I have another follow up appointment this month and on 5/25/2010 we have the babies service!  I totally don't know how thats going to go. I feel like I am going crazy...I want to just yell at someone, don't know who deserves it right now.  I really just want my baby back, I know it sounds so sucky to say and I know it can't happen but I am so mad about everything that's happened.  I think about her all the time and I dream about what she would look like and what she would sound like. I'm sorry to everyone if this sounds bad or anything, I just feel stuck!  I don't want to be stuck anymore.

goillini823

I"m really sorry you're feeling this way. I've had so many days and weeks just like this. The first month or so was really bad, and than I got better for a bit, but than my baby's due date came, and I've gotta admit I went right back to point A, and than I had an early loss at the beginning of April which just made things even worse.

Now that I know he would have been almost a month old I keep thinking about how he would be, what we would be doing, how life would be so different with him here. I miss him like crazy, and I too find myself so angry, and I dont even know at who or what anymore. 

I hope you feel better soon.

Puppins

I can understand the crazy part. I felt like a maniac for the first 2 months- I am starting to feel more sane. Just know that you are not alone, any feelings you have are completely normal, not that it makes you feel any better- but you are not crazy. Hope you are feeling better soon.

millejj1

Sorry it's been tough! Sending good thoughts your way!