Edit: I'm an idiot, have fun bashing me

*KC*luvs*RJ*

Two years ago a woman in my neighborhood left her three small children in her home while she ran to the corner store.  It was less than a block away.  Her house caught fire while she was away, and all three of her children died in the fire.  This could have happened to you.  She thought, hey I can just run to the store while they sleep.  Her life is now ruined and she's in jail.

Please seek help. 

daisy_dueller

robynlesley:

Do you bring your child into the bathroom?

Yes. If he is awake, he is in the bathroom with me. Always.

finally2006

I hope to holy hell nothing ever happens to your husband or you are screwed.  I am not a single mama but any means but my DH routinely leaves for 2-3 days a time and I would never come ranting and raving about to these women...are you insane? I would be very offended by you if I were them.

Change your perspective.  It sounds like you are approaching time alone with your LO as a 3 day chore, treat him like the blessing his is and enjoy your alone time together.

In the meantime, I hope your husband hustles home to relieve you of your mothering duties.  

 

krys2729

i think it is violetvirgo's siggy... i love the qoute: "you're raising a human being, not managing an inconvenience."  too true.

christina-marie

"Leaving my baby in his crib while taking my dog outside for 5 minutes in the pouring rain does not equal child endangerment.?" Yes, actually it does. Also, I think you'd be better served to liken this to the stress of a partnered SAHM (who lives this on a daily basis) not a SM-who lives it every hour of every day. I don't mean to sound snarky when I say this, so please take my meaning FWIW- get a grip, let go of your preconcieved notions of how you thought this would be, and get out of your own head. You're freaking yourself out about something which is really pretty minor. We all have those "moments" where we irrationally breakdown, but taking the dog for a stroll with your child alone is absolutely the last thing to do to get over that feeling. The last.

christina-marie

Forgot to add 2 things. 1. You're throwing up some serious red flags for PPD. I suggest you get that checked tomorrow if possible. 2. It appears you're angry/resentful at your H for not keeping up with the childcare duties you feel he should ve fulfilling and unfortunately, tonight, you took those frustrations out on your baby. Talk to your DH, and please get checked out okay? Again, not trying to be mean, just real. I think this entire post is one giant cry for help.

M.Amy

I know Robyn and she is a wonderful mother. If you read her blog you would see what a loving, caring, and dedicated mom she is to her son. I would totally trust her with my child.

I can see how her comments could be misconstrued but as she tried to clear up she basically went into her yard to let her dog pee.  

As a woman whose husband sometimes travels I am also in awe of the many women who bear the sole responsibility of caring for their kid(s). Not trying to compare situations at all, it is just we sometimes get a small glimpse of what single parents experience all of the time. 

superherostocker

robynlesley:

 

I've also SHOWERED when my son was in his crib.  He is 8 months old and does not like to be alone. But there are times when you have to take care of yourself. Relieve yourself. Do you bring your child into the bathroom?

.  

You can't just leave him in the crib he can suffocate. I take my son in the bathroom with me every time. When I am in the shower, he stands in his walker where I can see him. He was in my womb for 9 months, I am not afraid of letting him watch me relieve myself. If anything, he is learning where we go potty. 

CaptainD

*KC*luvs*RJ*:

Two years ago a woman in my neighborhood left her three small children in her home while she ran to the corner store.  It was less than a block away.  Her house caught fire while she was away, and all three of her children died in the fire.  This could have happened to you.  She thought, hey I can just run to the store while they sleep.  Her life is now ruined and she's in jail.

Please seek help. 

WOW!  The drama on this board! 

CaptainD

christina-marie:

"Leaving my baby in his crib while taking my dog outside for 5 minutes in the pouring rain does not equal child endangerment. " Yes, actually it does. Also, I think you'd be better served to liken this to the stress of a partnered SAHM (who lives this on a daily basis) not a SM-who lives it every hour of every day. I don't mean to sound snarky when I say this, so please take my meaning FWIW- get a grip, let go of your preconcieved notions of how you thought this would be, and get out of your own head. You're freaking yourself out about something which is really pretty minor. We all have those "moments" where we irrationally breakdown, but taking the dog for a stroll with your child alone is absolutely the last thing to do to get over that feeling. The last.

Whoa!  Being a SAHM has its own challenges that SM's don't understand!!  Add in taking care of a grown up baby (haha!) including dinner, etc.  Just sayin

CaptainD

superherostocker:

robynlesley:

 

I've also SHOWERED when my son was in his crib.  He is 8 months old and does not like to be alone. But there are times when you have to take care of yourself. Relieve yourself. Do you bring your child into the bathroom?

.  

You can't just leave him in the crib he can suffocate. I take my son in the bathroom with me every time. When I am in the shower, he stands in his walker where I can see him. He was in my womb for 9 months, I am not afraid of letting him watch me relieve myself. If anything, he is learning where we go potty. 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!  OMG!

CaptainD

Take it easy girls.  I am sure that we all have the perfect Mom badges.  I am not a SM and I do admire those who are (don't start coming down on me, simply a compliment) but it sure seems like Robyn's post was a good opportunity for you girls to break loose some of your pent up frustrations.  Unless you are perfect - and none of us are - keep the stones in your pockets.  Maybe this will turn around and the flames will come here instead of someone who was just paying your a$$es a compliment.  GEEZ!

Lissa832

I agree with a pp who said that by this post it implied that you took the dog around the block or something.  I was very disturbed by that.  Now, I'm assuming you were in your front yard in view of your home.  I personally would not have left DS in his crib while having a meltdown to let the dog out.  I wouldn't, however, have a problem with walking to the yard for 5 minutes during a nap.  When DS was a baby, I used to leave him in his crib napping to check the mail.  The boxes were a few houses down.  Does that make me negligent?  No.  Did I leave him alone for a couple of minutes?  Yes.  If he was going to to just up and suffocate as someone implied could happen, that would have probably happened without my knowledge, even while in the house because I didn't hover over him while he napped.  I guess I need DCFS called on me too. 

To everyone saying that they take their LO to the bathroom with them.  Get over it.  Sometimes you need to put your kid in the crib to take a shower or pee, even if they are upset.  Sometimes you have to put the baby down to clean the house.  As a new mom, I was the same way.  I would pee while holding DS.  I would wait until DH got home to shower.  Guess what?  Sometimes that is not feasible.  You put your kid in a safe place, such as the crib, and you get what you need done.  Ask the doctor.  They will tell you to do the same thing.  Actually, if you are at a breaking point, most professionals will tell you to do just what this OP did.  Set the baby down and walk outside for a few minutes.  A crying baby is a baby that it alive.  And I learned that in a parenting class before DS was born. Gasp!

I have compassion for SM.  I do have some similarities with SM.  DH is in the military.  He has been gone for long periods of time.  Over a two year period, he was gone for more than 2/3 of it.  Was I officially a SM?  No.  Did it feel like it?  Absolutely.  Did I encounter the same stressors and struggles that SM do?  Absolutely.  Three days without a break is difficult to someone who is not used to it.  Three days without a break is difficult for someone who IS used to it. 

I think the OP does sound a little dramatic and maybe it might serve her well to seek help.  However, we all have meltdowns every now and then.  To all of the SMs saying, "We deal with this 24/7."  Well, good for you.  We all do what we have to in order to take care of our kids.  SM lives aren't necessarily harder than being a mom in general, so give the OP a break.  Give her the benefit of the doubt that she is just having a really bad day.

LittleApple

Yup.  You are right.  You are still an idiot.  Get some help.

littlemaybaby

superherostocker:

robynlesley:

 

I've also SHOWERED when my son was in his crib.  He is 8 months old and does not like to be alone. But there are times when you have to take care of yourself. Relieve yourself. Do you bring your child into the bathroom?

.  

You can't just leave him in the crib he can suffocate. I take my son in the bathroom with me every time. When I am in the shower, he stands in his walker where I can see him. He was in my womb for 9 months, I am not afraid of letting him watch me relieve myself. If anything, he is learning where we go potty. 

LMFAO!!!!  Most people do put their children in their cribs to sleep and *gasp* leave them there . . . *gasp* . . . sometimes all night.  And some people (although not me) even let them scream there while practicing CIO.  They should all be arrested because their children could suffocate.  Again, LMFAO!!!!

And I'm not saying that what the OP did was right - but um, I do put my baby to sleep in his crib and leave the room.

Scout05

superherostocker:

robynlesley:

 

I've also SHOWERED when my son was in his crib.  He is 8 months old and does not like to be alone. But there are times when you have to take care of yourself. Relieve yourself. Do you bring your child into the bathroom?

.  

You can't just leave him in the crib he can suffocate. I take my son in the bathroom with me every time. When I am in the shower, he stands in his walker where I can see him. He was in my womb for 9 months, I am not afraid of letting him watch me relieve myself. If anything, he is learning where we go potty. 

Okay, I thought the OP was out of line, but come on with this.

I'm pretty sure babies sleep in cribs. You need to calm down.

Dani3679

CaptainD:

Take it easy girls.  I am sure that we all have the perfect Mom badges.  I am not a SM and I do admire those who are (don't start coming down on me, simply a compliment) but it sure seems like Robyn's post was a good opportunity for you girls to break loose some of your pent up frustrations.  Unless you are perfect - and none of us are - keep the stones in your pockets.  Maybe this will turn around and the flames will come here instead of someone who was just paying your a$$es a compliment.  GEEZ!

 

I'm really not trying to get involved in all this drama, but I just had to point out that all "flames" were not from the single parents, these were all other women who found their way over to this board because there was some drama to be seen.  So make sure you know what you're talking about before "flaming" the SP for something they/we didn't even do!

samfish2bcrab

Holy hell.   Some of you seem nuts. 

You can't leave your child while you pee or shower?   That is effed up.

mavilabride

Wow. Some of you ladies must pee for a really long time. I would look into that. And having your baby in the bathroom while you poop is unsanitary, just like flushing the toilet with the lid open is.

MartiniChick01

I've been a single parent for 15 yrs.  3 days is nothing, really.

I guess some of us women are stronger than others.  When you're forced to step up and do what you have to do, you just do it and don't feel the need to tell everyone that you're doing it.

ETA:  When you have to count on your income to pay all of the bills, don't see an end in sight for when you will be able to do something without hauling your child with you, have to make all of the major decisions in your child's life, etc, then come on here and tell us what it's like to be a single parent.

samfish2bcrab

mavilabride:

Wow. Some of you ladies must pee for a really long time. I would look into that. And having your baby in the bathroom while you poop is unsanitary, just like flushing the toilet with the lid open is.

You're on my nutty list, too.

mavilabride

samfish2bcrab:

mavilabride:

Wow. Some of you ladies must pee for a really long time. I would look into that. And having your baby in the bathroom while you poop is unsanitary, just like flushing the toilet with the lid open is.

You're on my nutty list, too.

ToledoDeux

superherostocker:

robynlesley:

 

I've also SHOWERED when my son was in his crib.  He is 8 months old and does not like to be alone. But there are times when you have to take care of yourself. Relieve yourself. Do you bring your child into the bathroom?

.  

You can't just leave him in the crib he can suffocate. I take my son in the bathroom with me every time. When I am in the shower, he stands in his walker where I can see him. He was in my womb for 9 months, I am not afraid of letting him watch me relieve myself. If anything, he is learning where we go potty. 

Uh......huh?  Do you stand over him all night while he sleeps in his crib, too?  

Yessa83

preg_amy:

haha, ditto to this ^^

TravelinMama

You're an idiot for more than one reason.......ever heard of CPS??

gogo2325

wait?? You aren't a single Mom...you are comparing yourself to US??? WTF...I have been taking care of my 7 month old..ALL ALONE...his dad NEVER helped..and I have TWO dogs. NEVER did I leave my son alone....WTF?

transcriber87

WOW!!  Yep, if I go to the bathroom, Cadance follows me, when I am in the shower, she is either in there with me or crying for me, yep, when I am getting something to eat or drink, she is right there with me! I have been a single mom for over a year now and I can not imagine someone whining over being left alone for a few days.  I know teething is hard..there have been moments when i just want to scream sometimes, there have been times I just want to get in my car and ride around the block...but nope...The only break I get is when I am at work!  Us single moms do this 24/7, 365 most of the time! My ex wants nothing to do with Cadance so I don't have the weekend visitation which is for the best and I have hardly any family to watch her, unless it is my mom. 

I will tell you a story my grandma told me a long time ago, when I was a latchkey child (my mom also is a single mom)... My great aunt had left her child alone to go next door, mind you, this was back in the 50's.  She was over there maybe 10 minutes, don't remember the whole story, but the house somehow caught on fire and went up so fast that she could not get her baby out and all she heard was it screaming as it was dying in the fire! It doesn't take maybe a minute for a disaster to happen.  

I agree with a PP, maybe you do have PPD...I was diagnosed with it when Cadance was over 1 year old.  If you have to call your best friend to go grocery shopping (unless you don't have a way there) that is a tip-off that it could be PPD.  I would def. see your doctor

 

RJMbim

OMG!

RJMbim

brownmouse:

ShellShockedMama:

alone with your own CHILD? for a WHOLE four days?! omg. stop the presses.

Dayum, even trashy barbie doesn't leave her kids at home alone.

see?

Cackle!

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Piranha54

littlemaybaby:

superherostocker:

robynlesley:

 

I've also SHOWERED when my son was in his crib.  He is 8 months old and does not like to be alone. But there are times when you have to take care of yourself. Relieve yourself. Do you bring your child into the bathroom?

.  

You can't just leave him in the crib he can suffocate. I take my son in the bathroom with me every time. When I am in the shower, he stands in his walker where I can see him. He was in my womb for 9 months, I am not afraid of letting him watch me relieve myself. If anything, he is learning where we go potty. 

LMFAO!!!!  Most people do put their children in their cribs to sleep and *gasp* leave them there . . . *gasp* . . . sometimes all night.  And some people (although not me) even let them scream there while practicing CIO.  They should all be arrested because their children could suffocate.  Again, LMFAO!!!!

And I'm not saying that what the OP did was right - but um, I do put my baby to sleep in his crib and leave the room.

Exactly!  

robynlesley

I wasn't going to look at this post again or bother replying, since most of you have your minds made up that I'm a depressed woman who endangers her child.  Many of you seem to take pleasure out of figuratively beating up a complete stranger. I guess I don't have that meanness in me and I'm very sorry that some of you do.

You've done your job quite well, ladies. Kudos to you for making me feel like sh!t. Your flames burned me quite well. You can be proud of yourselves.

I can see where my original post came off badly.  I tried to clarify and was accused of "backpedaling".  It is what it is and I cannot change it. And I cannot change what was done.

There is no point for me to say anything further.  It will just make things even worse?as this post probably will do, too.

But for those posters who are regulars on this board and not just jumping on the "Bash Robyn Bandwagon", I truly apologize for bringing this here and for offending you.