The dreaded ? from those who knew, but don't know...

Zed58

Have you gotten this one yet?  

"So. How are you feeling?" with the glance down to the mid section to see how that little bump is developing.

Umm. . .I feel like sh!t.  Thanks for asking.  How are you feeling?

 

Three times in the last four days, I have run into someone that knew of my pregnancy, but did not know of my mc (part of the joys of a an excited five year who will tell anyone and everyone about the baby in mommy's belly).  Today, it was dd's speech therapist. 

Then there is the awkward "Unfortunately we lost the baby."  As I choke back the tears and try to put some kind of a smile on my face.

Worse yet, is the even more awkward "I'm so sorry." Followed by an uncomfortable pause in the conversation, before I very kindly say "It's okay.  We're sad, but accepting it."

Then I see the wheels turning in the eyes of the person I'm speaking with.  You can see them questioning how they are supposed to respond.  Do they inquire further about how we are dealing with the loss? Do they offer a hug? Do they change the subject completely?

AWKWARD!!!

 

 

magdalina.h

Yup, I've gotten it a few times. Normally it's congratulations you had the baby because my bump is gone. I just say thank you, but he didn't make it. They give me the pity look and I tell his story.

Buckets of Moonbeams

Just a few times.  I thank them, but tell them as gently as I can our baby passed away.  They feel awful.

nina&matt

I've gotten it a few times, I just tell them nicely that she came too early and unfortunately didn't make it. I don't give too many details because I dont want to have emotional breakdown in front of people. I lost it at her burial and can't deal with crying at the grocery stores, or anywhere anymore. They usually do feel akward and give me the sad eyes and then I change the subject.

Lissa832

Definitely been there.  It was the worst with my first m/c because my family and friends told EVERYONE I was pregnant but told NO ONE that I m/c.  With my last m/c, my BFF's mom saw me when I was in town visiting.  What does she say to me?  "Hey pregnant lady!"  I promptly burst into tears and told her I lost the baby 6 weeks ago.  Then, the next day I was in a car accident, two days before Christmas.  2009 pretty much sucked!

I'm sorry. I know how hard it is.

Lorange-8

I've gotten this a few times and I just tell them we lost the baby, end of story.  Also I've had pictures of my u/s posted on myspace account and a friend that didn't know I was pregnant but lost the baby, posted the following comment "April 28, 2010 4:38 PM omg ur pregnanttttt!! how excitinggg!!!!! congrats!!!" I had to PM her and tell her now we lost the baby. EERRR bothers me!

 My friend joke about making me a t-shirt that says don't ask!