FB Annoyance..

Sunflower730

So I put in my status: " April 24 - May 1st is National Infertility Awareness Week. As you play with your kids today, or tuck them into bed tonight, please take a minute to empathize with the millions of couples out there struggling to achieve what you have. If you or someone you love is affected by infertility, please post this in your status this week to show your support. ?"

I get the comment:  Adoption would be a WAY better choice than spending thousands of fertility treatments; seeing as there are so many children out in the world who need homes.

Seriously??

yodasmistress

I'm the kind of *biotch* that would put them in their place.  And I have literally defriended people over those types of comments. 

ams8099

I am so sorry for that ignorance. I would delete that comment. 

Sunflower730

I freaked out on her.. this is what I wrote:

Wow.. Do you know the cost of adoption is alot more than fertility treatments? It takes years to get processed, just to be put on a waiting list. Plus you need to have your own home, steady job, financially secure with a certian minimum in the bank. Not everyone who lives their life under an adoption process microscope passes . I went thru years of... treatments to get my 2 children who I lost early. Try walking in someone shoes who battles everyday to be a mom before you make stupid comments like that.

She wrote:

 Oh that's rich. First, you shouldn't assume you know anything about me or my health to make any of those assumptions.

And secondly, You SHOULD have all those things when you adopt, just like you SHOULD have those before you decide to get pregnant on your own. So that's not a legit argument at all. That's just common sense.

Perhaps you should just accept that everyone has their own opinions.

And BTW, since you're judging people for having an opinion. I have a blood clotting disorder in which my blood clots, cuts off the flow to the placenta and has caused 3 miscarriages. But, I don't know anything about the struggles of trying to be come a mom. I'm completely ignorant in this. All I did was state my own opinion and you apparently felt the need to attack. Grow up and get over this little cyber-bullying crap.

Don't make half-assed statements when you don't know anything about the person in the first place. Excuse me didn't you post on MY status. I deleted her after this.

Mrs.AmandaMqn

yodasmistress:

I'm the kind of *biotch* that would put them in their place.  And I have literally defriended people over those types of comments. 

 

ETA:

wow, she sounds like a peach. It's a good thing you deleted her.

k-mart

WOW! I'm glad you deleted her. She doesn't sound like a real "friend".

AimeeL85

I HATE that, seriously, it drives me absolutely crazy when people say that. I am all for adoption, but WHY do people act like it's the responsibility of the infertile community to adopt all children in the world without families?

When someone says they're expecting or are going to start trying to have a baby, you never hear anyone tell them they should just adopt....nope, just if you're infertile.

Ugh!

SallyAnneS

Ugh, I'm glad you deleted her.  You don't need people like that in your life.  And if she knows about the struggles to be a mom, why would she pull the 'just adopt' card?  I shake my head in disgust.

sabooth

ugh ugh ugh!! I just had a "friend" tell me today (FB comment on the IF video that's been posted on here a couple times) that

"I'm just concerned that an infertility video should also trumpet the wonders of adoption. With all the parentless kids in the world, and all the dangers of artificial insemination, rather than adding to the population of the planet we could take care of those already here." 

because the video doesn't tell/show aspects of the joys of adoption.

I think people who can easily have children (he managed to get his sorta-girlfriend pregnant their first time having sex when they were 15/16) just don't get that having your own DOES NOT equate the the joy of being pregnant, delivery, and raising your own child. Which sounds kinda stupid seeing as he has his OWN child... 

 

I appreciate what you all have said here, because saying to him "it's just not the same thing.." (while I do WHOLE-HEARTEDLY support adoption) won't get me very far in my "logical reasons" and he'll slam me for being selfish or something.. I can see this turning into him being unfriended very quickly here.

AimeeL85

sabooth:

ugh ugh ugh!! I just had a "friend" tell me today (FB comment on the IF video that's been posted on here a couple times) that

"I'm just concerned that an infertility video should also trumpet the wonders of adoption. With all the parentless kids in the world, and all the dangers of artificial insemination, rather than adding to the population of the planet we could take care of those already here." 

because the video doesn't tell/show aspects of the joys of adoption.

I think people who can easily have children (he managed to get his sorta-girlfriend pregnant their first time having sex when they were 15/16) just don't get that having your own DOES NOT equate the the joy of being pregnant, delivery, and raising your own child. Which sounds kinda stupid seeing as he has his OWN child... 

 

I appreciate what you all have said here, because saying to him "it's just not the same thing.." (while I do WHOLE-HEARTEDLY support adoption) won't get me very far in my "logical reasons" and he'll slam me for being selfish or something.. I can see this turning into him being unfriended very quickly here.

If he has his own kid, I would just say "so why didn't you choose to adopt rather than adding to the population?"  That's the other thing that ticks me off....population control is also the responsibility of infertiles and infertiles only.

nina&matt

Im glad you defriended her. What an a$$. If she knows the struggle then she should know the pain that comes with IF and losing a baby you have tried so hard and long for, and be more considerate of what she says. sorry hun!

MrsT1209

I'm so sorry you had to deal with that.  The ignorance of people never fails to astound me. 

I've had the adoption comment twice today as well.  While it's an avenue we may pursue in the future, we haven't reached that point emotionally yet and you can't really explain that to someone who doesn't understand. 

sabooth

sabooth:

ugh ugh ugh!! I just had a "friend" tell me today (FB comment on the IF video that's been posted on here a couple times) that

"I'm just concerned that an infertility video should also trumpet the wonders of adoption. With all the parentless kids in the world, and all the dangers of artificial insemination, rather than adding to the population of the planet we could take care of those already here."

 

Not to make this into 'my' post.. but I wrote the following back to him

"Adoption is GREAT. I do plan on adopting - someday; but it's not an easy process and in some cases can cost more than an IVF or an IUI. There's a lengthy process to go through where you have to meet certain requirements and then "the system" gives you a pass/fail. It's NOT a guarantee..

And since when is it the job of the "infertiles of the world" to adopt all the parent-less children in the world? You don't go up to someone who got pregnant "the old fashioned way" and say "Why'd you go and do that? There are plenty of children needing a family already." That's CRAZY!"

ALY1981

ugh DELETE - smart.  People ae so clueless.

AimeeL85

sabooth:

sabooth:

ugh ugh ugh!! I just had a "friend" tell me today (FB comment on the IF video that's been posted on here a couple times) that

"I'm just concerned that an infertility video should also trumpet the wonders of adoption. With all the parentless kids in the world, and all the dangers of artificial insemination, rather than adding to the population of the planet we could take care of those already here."

 

Not to make this into 'my' post.. but I wrote the following back to him

"Adoption is GREAT. I do plan on adopting - someday; but it's not an easy process and in some cases can cost more than an IVF or an IUI. There's a lengthy process to go through where you have to meet certain requirements and then "the system" gives you a pass/fail. It's NOT a guarantee..

And since when is it the job of the "infertiles of the world" to adopt all the parent-less children in the world? You don't go up to someone who got pregnant "the old fashioned way" and say "Why'd you go and do that? There are plenty of children needing a family already." That's CRAZY!"

You go girl! So glad you wrote that back! Did they respond again?