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Parenting
MH works the overnight and I HATE it
MH is a manager at a large delivery company. He has to work the night shift in his position and I don't really see that changing any time soon. For the most part we have wanted it this way so we could avoid day care. He is home one day with the kids and was home more than that when it was just E. I feel like I make the concessions of his schedule and I try to be understanding but I also feel like he makes it more of the issue.
Last night it was 9:30 and both kids were still up. Finally I put C in his crib and E went right in. C proceeded to cry and I let him cry it out. MH gets up and asked if I was serious in doing this. He only had 3 hours left for sleep. So he went to bring C in the bed. I said no and ended up bringing him downstairs with me. What aggravated me most was he said " you only have them for 3 hours and you are this inpatient". I wasn't inpatient. It was 9:30 and it's time for them to go to bed. We leave early in the morning and they are very cranky. And, furthermore they shouldn't be up that late. I need to have some down time.
I hate that he makes comments like that especially when it's not true. I work 4 days a week in the office (1/2 day at home on friday), commute about 2 hours a day and then come home to take care of two kids. I wanted this life and I deal with it when it's hard. But then I feel like he is trying to make me feel bad about the way I react to things. He makes his schedule an issue for us.
I don't know. I am sorry this is so long but I am just so tired of trying to keep the kids quiet so he can sleep, having to go out every single friday and saturday so he can sleep, having no time in my house to get things done, and just the whole darn schedule. It just plain sucks.
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Re: MH works the overnight and I HATE it
Gah, I do feel your pain. I work a wonkey schedule but nothing like over nights!! I am in bed at 12 and up at 5:30ish. I never get any extra sleep- really I have not asked for it. I cannot imagine what it's like to do overnights...
Sometimes it just doesn't work- even with the benefit of reduced daycare. Talk to your H and fill him in on how you're feeling- maybe you can come up with something!
Oh and HI! I miss you!
~Lisa
Mum to Owen and Lucas
Hi Li - Miss you as well!! Hope things are good. : )
That's true. It just gets to me sometimes but largely when he makes it an issue.
It's an issue in my house too- S will throw it in my face *well, I never see you b/c you work second shift* Ummmm...well, it's not my choice to work this super crappy shift. It was a family choice!
It's very hard to work off shift of each other. Period. I have found that you need to keep the line of communication WAY open.
~Lisa
Mum to Owen and Lucas
Yeah. It doesn't do much for our couple time at all!!! I think it is a sacrifice but at the same time, I honestly think he would have done it even if it wasn't for child care. It's just the nature of his business to be there before the day gets started.
Did you hear any news about the change in your schedule?
What does he do again?? Meh, working sucks, huh??
I should have the verbal offer today- m fingers are crossed!! I am still looking for a new nanny- what a painful process!!! I just wanna win the dang lottery and never have to worry about money again!!!
~Lisa
Mum to Owen and Lucas
I'm sorry.
It sucks to have to deal with a non-traditional schedule, I think. For the past 4-5 months, MH has been taking a class for his masters, so he makes up the hours he is gone at class by working late and some weekends. It can get so frustrating, so I can't even imagine when there isn't an end in sight, and it's overnight, too. And that's with me being a SAHM, so my schedule doesn't really conflict even though being home so much w/out him is draining on me.
don't we all!! although I think I would miss working. I just wish I could do it less : )
He is a manager for fedex ground.
well good luck!! I hope it's as good as you posted yesterday. That would be great. And the nanny search, ugh!! I can't imagine how hard that must be.
Ha! FedEx ground huh? My boys call FedEx trucks the stinky truck and used to tell drivers that when they saw them out and about
) My dad worked for UPS for 35 years- so we're a Big Brown family!!!
My H works in tranportation for so if he's ever looking for somehting new just let me know!
I will email you when I get the offer- I am not getting my hopes up for 22. Hell, I'll jump at 15k!!
~Lisa
Mum to Owen and Lucas
haha! too cute!
I'm thinking positive thoughts for you!!!
((hugs))
My head would have spun a few times if MH had said that to me. You're already feeling spread too thin and then to have guilt thrown at you? No fair.
What you're doing is hard. I give you lots and lots of credit for all that you have on your plate on a daily basis. Its a lot! Wish I could help!