How do you explain AP?

Krista123105

I've been trying to explain to my family that we LIKE bedsharing with DS, but they keep commenting how it'll be nice once he's STTN in his crib.  DS starts the night out sleeping in his pnp in our room, but usually ends up sleeping with us by around 1 am where he sleeps the rest of the night.  Last night, however, he slept in his pnp until 4:30 am, and when I commented to my mom that I really missed him she didn't really understand.  I was sad when he only slept with us for a couple of hours last night, so I am nowhere near ready to put him in his own room the entire night! 

I've tried explaining the AP concept, but people of my parents' generation don't seem to "get it".  They've never said anything, but I get the feeling that they think babywearing is a little strange too.  How do you explain AP to people who ask?  Please understand...my family has the best of intentions and isn't critical of what we're doing, they just don't really understand it.  I know I don't owe anybody an explanation, but I would just like a standard blurb to use with anyone who asks, offers parenting advice, etc.  Thanks!

mrstarawalsh

I don't explain. I just say "this is what works for our family and we are all happy". When given unwanted advice I either say "that doesn't mesh with my philosiphy of parenting, but I appreciate your advice" or "thank you I will take that into consideration" and leave it at that.

risysmama

mrstarawalsh:

I don't explain. I just say "this is what works for our family and we are all happy". When given unwanted advice I either say "that doesn't mesh with my philosiphy of parenting, but I appreciate your advice" or "thank you I will take that into consideration" and leave it at that.

Ditto this.  It takes too much time to explain what works for our family and I'm not interested in debating with people about their perspectives.

DandelionMom

I just smile and nod and do what works for my family. 

mrs.baum

In situations like I that, I don't really bother explaining. She feels one way and no matter how much explaining you do, her opinion isn't going to change.

EmmieB

My mom is the same way - totally supportive but she didn't really understand at first. I used the SIDS explanation - that having the baby in the room GREATLY reduces SIDS risk because of the breathing and presence of other people...and SIDS is a risk for the first year (it's a very tiny risk after 3 months, but I leave that part out!)

I also say things like "he's only small and cuddly for such a short amount of time, I want to get it while the gettin's good!" and "strollers are so unwieldy! This way he can see what I see, I get some cuddles in, we both stay warmer, and it's good exercise!"

Recently I said to my mom: "You like shoes...I like baby carriers."

I don't get into AP as a whole concept because it's not really what we're doing. We're just raising Bunny the way babies all over the world are raised - and the way American babies were raised until very recently (historically speaking.) 

And I know what you mean - I *want* Bunny to sleep in his crib (which is sidecar'd) but when he does he feels SO far away! I like it much better when he sleeps with his face mashed up against my boob.