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Austin Babies
OrangeFelt
member
Will BFing "ruin" nips?
OrangeFelt
member
This past weekend, my BF and I started talking a bit more seriously about child rearing methodologies. This is solely about the birthing and BFing part, and let me preface with three things to keep in mind:
1. the man is a physiologist and ridiculously mensa-member smart.
2. #1 means that when it actually happens, he'll start to do actual research
3. This is still a year or two in the future.
4. Surprise surprise, we were drinking some Sunday afternoon Sangria.. so it may sound silly.
Convo:
Him: "You know, I'm not sure I'd want you to do natural.. why wreck the playground?"
Me: "hmm.. yeah.. I'm pretty afraid of that myself, so we'll see what happens. Maybe the kid will be too big since I'm small anyways."
Him: "Yeah, that could just get dangerous."
Me: "Um, would you want me to BF?"
Him: *makes a face* "Well, *I* wasn't BF and I turned out great. Besides, it'll ruin your nipples."
Me: "what???"
Him: "haven't you ever seen nipples after BFing?"
Me: "No, I don't see my friend's nipples all that often." *dirty look*
Him: *sheepish look* "Oh, well, it does."
So.. what say you, those with experience?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Will BFing "ruin" nips?
Mine look better!! No more inverted nipple! They darken up with pregnancy but after Abby at least they went back to normal color.
And no, you can't ever erase that image from your brain now =P
you bf is silly.
I bf'ed for 20 months and mine look the same. Mine didn't even darken or anything.
I don't think you'll wreck the playground either I mean if you did, how would so many get more than one kid...
silly bf.
You know, I'm not sure I'd want you to do natural.. why wreck the playground?"
Ok. What does this mean? He doesn't want you to do a vaginal birth because it would ruin sex?
You're right. It is burned. :P
Better? Really?? I think he might be excessively worried about it because he REALLY likes how I am, um, put together.
Not that it would ruin sex - I think its more of the thought of it that kind of grosses him out. Or maybe that's what it is.. I kind of wrote that one off.
"You know, I'm not sure I'd want you to do natural.. why wreck the playground?"
HA!!! That is what it is meant to do! Trust me, it all goes back and everything is normal again. :-)
This!?
I only BF for 3 weeks... my nipples did not change. Breasts? YES! But, that was not from BF I don't think. They are much saggier (word?) now. I keep telling my husband I am going to need a lift when I am done having babies! ;-)
Yep.. assuming we can live together.
My place will be on the market next week and when it sells we are consolidating households. EEK!
ETA: The name conversation we had on the same day was even funnier. I was rollin'
yeah my breasts are much saggier, but nips are the same I am still BFing. I read somewhere that it's not BFing that makes the breasts change it's pregnancy, so unless you're going to have someone else gestate your child he might be out of luck.
Wow - amazing the thoughts some people have stuck in their heads! What post BF nips has he been analyzing to get this info?
First - playground if FINE. Trust me. No issues there at all.
Second - nips are exactly the same pre and post bf. They were huge and they still are. Same color, etc, etc.
Third - boobs, those don't go back. They are saggier and not so full and fun. But I've heard that happens regardless of BF.
Yay! awesome!!
Oh, yeah. My boobs are smaller after BFing. Supposedly boobs get saggy mostly from pregnancy, not BFing. The supporting muscles are pulled south by the belly and never fully go back.
I'm sorry, but I'm totally giving your BF the side eye right now.
1. the man is a physiologist and ridiculously mensa-member smart.
I would think a mensa-member smart physiologist would realize that this is what a woman's body is MEANT to do and that, no, it doesn't "ruin" anything.
Convo:
Him: "You know, I'm not sure I'd want you to do natural.. why wreck the playground?"
Not really his choice. And as someone who has had my abdomen cut open (with a lovely scar and still some spots I can't feel after THREE years) as well as a vaginal birth, I'd do vaginal again in a heartbeat.
Me: "hmm.. yeah.. I'm pretty afraid of that myself, so we'll see what happens. Maybe the kid will be too big since I'm small anyways."
Him: "Yeah, that could just get dangerous."
Me: "Um, would you want me to BF?"
Him: *makes a face* "Well, *I* wasn't BF and I turned out great. Besides, it'll ruin your nipples."
Me: "what???"
Him: "haven't you ever seen nipples after BFing?"
Me: "No, I don't see my friend's nipples all that often." *dirty look*
Him: *sheepish look* "Oh, well, it does."
This creeps me out. I'm reading it as, "I have made out w/ the same woman both pre and post child." Maybe he's talking about a previous wife/ girlfriend w/ whom he had a baby, but seriously, if ever my husband was talking about my body like that after I had bore his child, I'd be pissed.
Both Jon and I have not so perfect bodies now. Part of it by sheer laziness (me), part of it by necessary surgeries (both). I just can't even IMAGINE one of us saying to the other that we had "wrecked" anything, especially how sex felt w/ each other.
Aaaaand, for the record, nips are in great shape after nursing two boys.
/rant
After two vaginal births (the first of which involved not one but two third-degree tears) and a combined 26 months of BFing, I have it on authority from my DH that both the playground and the nips are just fine.
And as for me, I'd gladly do it all again. Recovery's just not that bad.
So, I know you two were all sangria'd up and everything, but was he really suggesting that he would choose major abdominal surgery for you over the unlikely possibility of a change in his sex life? 'Cause if he was, then he needs a swift kick in the MENSA for that one, physiologist or not.
Yeah, that's what #2 is about. I guarantee you that as soon as it DOES happen, he'll start doing real research on it and swing in the complete opposite direction. I can pretty much call that one out on the carpet and say it is so.
And MC - That's what that *dirty look* was all about! He does NOT have a kid with anyone, but I know he had dated someone with a kid before. He's a bit older than I am, so its forgivable, but I chose to not drill into it and start more conflict and just give him the total stink eye instead.
ETA: Oh, and he used to work on corpses a lot while in school.
Mine too. 2 weeks PP they weren't pretty, but now they're back to normal.
"There is a fine line between a princess and a witch...thinking you're one does NOT give you the right to act like the other." my grandmother
MC - I think it's that "I love you" time of the day.
I'd be giving your BF a swift kickintheass, sangria or not.
this and LOL
This, all of this, exactly.
I sincerely hope your BF really does do the research and change some of his notions about mothers and birth.
Oh, I wasn't judging based on dating/ being w/ someone w/ a child.
Yeah. I guess I'm just wondering why he would think that nursing changed these women's nipples, unless he had experience w/ the same woman before and after nursing. Different women have different nips (clearly). Again, I would think a physiologist (of all people) would know this.