Moms of Toddlers and Twins

BizEB

How did you handle things with DC#1 while you were delivering your twins?  I'll probably have a c-section and I will have plenty of family on hand to help with DS but I'm not sure when to have him visit, how to introduce him to the twins or if I should be considering/doing anything else to make my absence and the transition easier on him.  He'll be 23 months when the twins arrive (hopefully) and he and I have only been apart one night.  TIA for any insight.

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Griffin was 2y2mo when the twins were born and had only been away from us 2 nights total (1 night each time) before.

We dropped him off at my sister's house the night before my c/s (since I had to be at the hospital at 6am).  He was totally fine with it - and LOVED his time there --- and my sister's family loved having him - they actually asked me this weekend if they could have him sleep over one night soon b/c they had so much fun with him last June staying over!

I was hesitant to have him come to the hospital - wasn't sure I wanted him to- but decided I wanted him to come after I had the twins --- but not that first day. i was really sore from the c/s and really tired - sleeping constnatly.  My sister brought him the day after they were born.  (check with your hospital- some have changed rules about children visiting b/c of the bird flu)

We had him wear his big brother T-shirt (he had a few actually) and made a big deal out of him being the big brother and getting to visit his baby brothers.  He LOVED seeing them - wanted to check out their hands and feet - it was the most precious moment.

he was used to not being able to jump on my belly from being pg - so in the hospital bed when he sat next to me he was good about staying off of it (i kept a pillow over it in case) and let him know i had a boo boo there so he had to be careful. it was painful a little bit when he would get on/off the bed and hug me- but it was OK.

everyone that visited our home brought him a gift  - which was really helpful. He LOVED opening all the gifts.  When people visited they played with him - he got tons of attention.

We also kept him in daycare full time while i was on maternity leave - kept his routine going, and he had more fun there than he ever would have had at home with me and the babies all day.

sorry- this got long- just trying to remember it all

 

LeapDayLinsey

I was in the hospital for a few days prior to the delivery with no advanced notice of that so we just kind of "winged it" for those 2 days.  I knew I was going to have a C-section and it was important to me that my DD be the first to meet her new sisters.  They went right from "our" surgery to the NICU witha  brief stop in the hallway to meet everyone.  DS wasn't allowed into the NICU where the sisters were for a week.  We were able to hold them up to the glass to meet them but technically my plan for her to be the first really didn't work.  I had her visit when I was in recovery (she's just turned 4 though).  Then she went home and came to visit daily while I was in the hospital for small amounts of time but sisters were always still in the NICU so it was just us and not dealing with 2 newborns at the same time.  She did really well overall though.  I'm glad she god to come to visit and the only thing I would have changed is for her to have been able to spend time with sisters before the rest of the family (MIL is a bit overwhelming but that story is for another...much longer...post.!)

Dina&Joe

the plan was to have my dad come get DS1 the night before the c/s.  However, my water broke at 3am 6w early so we just called my parents and they met us at the hospital, gave them DS1 and a key to our house and his bag!  he didnt visit due to his major fear of hospitals (he had spent 4 days in the children's hosp just a few months before) and when he visited while I was in for ptl it was not good...

I was missing him like crazy, but apparently he was having such a good time with my parents, he didnt notice I was gone! 

Rangergal9

We plan on keeping DD in daycare, so if its a scheduled c/s it'll be early in the morning so MIL will just drop DD off at daycare that day.  MIL will have to take care of DD for us while I am in the hospital, or my mother who will be here visiting.

mnmplusthree

I was in and out of the hospital for the 2 weeks prior to the twins delivery. My parents live about 5 min from my house, so when I went to the hospital for the last time, I called them at about 5am and told them that I was bringing DS over. That was a Sunday. They took him to church with them and then home for a nap. I got to see him that night at the hospital. On Monday, they took him to the babysitter (same person who has watched him while I was still working and the same one as watches all 3 now) to keep him in a routine. They came up and visited for about 20 min on Monday night. Late monday night, they decided to induce me. My babysitter is a good friend and she said if need be, to bring him over and he can just stay the night. My parents dropped him off at 1am at the babysitters house. I delivered at 1130 and 1158am. The babysitter and her husband came up and visited that night and brought DS with them. He was great! He was not that interested in the babies. He did kiss them and he wanted to play with my FIL and my dad. My IL's took him home with them and my SIL (who has an in home daycare) kept him that night. He stayed with my IL's until the day we came home. They brought him back after we had gotten home from the hospital on day 3 of the babies being here. Overall, my family and IL's were wonderful about helping out. I was so worried about him feeling left out, but with all of the people he had to play with that he didn't normally get to play with, he was great! When he came home, we made sure to show him the babies and then put the babies in their bed and play with just him for a while.