Rude things your MIL has said...

hcastiaux

So I read someone's post about their mother (Oh my - I am so sorry!) and someone suggested this post.  GO!

I'll go first.  SIL has a friend who wanted twin girls, so she did everything medically she could to have them.  She succeeded.  EVERY SINGLE STINKING TIME feeding comes up, MIL says, "SIL's friend, the one with the twins, feeds her kids in the swings, that is why you need to have two swings."  In fact, any time the twins comes up and she has heard about what the friend has done she always says, "SIL's friend, the one with the twins.... etc."  At this point I zone out.  Last time I ended up saying, "That's nice, I am not doing it that way."  I am hoping that she got the point.  We shall see.... Not completely rude, but still irritating.

 EDIT: BTW: I really love my MIL.  She is awesome.  Just a little annoying.  I know she means well.

babydontforget

When she saw me last--this was on Saturday--my MIL gasped at my appearance, and then puffed out her cheeks and made fat-person gestures with her hands. 

Real nice. 

 

hcastiaux

WOW.  What did you do/say?  Anything?

I don't even know how I would respond to that.

babydontforget

I said, "OK, that is the last fat gesture you are allowed to make around me. Don't you know you can't make pregnant women feel bad about their size?" And then she was clearly mortified and told me how great I looked and how much she loved seeing me pregnant, etc.

Honestly, it didn't bother me much, even before she backtracked, because I really think that I just took her by surprise and she acted before she thought. (My belly is growing at an astounding rate.) I'm sure she's still pissed at herself, and, as a person who frequently puts her own feet in her mouth, I feel bad for her, and more amused than anything else. So I just let it go. It wasn't hard--I adore her.

laurenpetro

not my MIL but when i talked to my father's wife for the "congratulations" phone call, what i got was, "oh, so now you'll have to stop working."

well lady, since i don't have a money fairy and the quarters i planted in my back yard have yet to sprout a tree, i will be working. ?jackazz.?

gumiberg

well, its not so much what she said but what she did.  when the babies were 4 days old (we just got home from the hospital) she came to visit.  she was appalled that we were not using a diaper changing table but instead a mat on a dresser.  she called us every day thereon after to tell us our babies would roll off the dresser and die. 

about a week later we got a visit from a CPS officer.  she had filed like 10 reports us against us.  the first was the diaper changing table...i guess when they didnt act on that alone, she made up a bunch of other stuff (like that we would get drunk and suffocate the babies in their sleep).  such BS!!

needless to say, she is mentally ill.  but i havent seen her much since (maybe 5 times?) so her opportunity to say rude things to me is very slight.

prayin4ablssn

Whhhhaaaaaaaat?!?!?!?! And I thought my MIL was a nut case!

hcastiaux

Your nose?  Really?  I have never heard that.  The ankles thing, well, my ankles no longer exist due to the swelling- but no one needs to point that out to me (although my mom did, very lovingly, while I was trying on shorts on Sunday).

babydontforget

Whoa! OK, you win. That's totally nuts.

gumiberg:

well, its not so much what she said but what she did.  when the babies were 4 days old (we just got home from the hospital) she came to visit.  she was appalled that we were not using a diaper changing table but instead a mat on a dresser.  she called us every day thereon after to tell us our babies would roll off the dresser and die. 

about a week later we got a visit from a CPS officer.  she had filed like 10 reports us against us.  the first was the diaper changing table...i guess when they didnt act on that alone, she made up a bunch of other stuff (like that we would get drunk and suffocate the babies in their sleep).  such BS!!

needless to say, she is mentally ill.  but i havent seen her much since (maybe 5 times?) so her opportunity to say rude things to me is very slight.

macchiatto

WOW, gumiberg. You definitely win. So sorry you had to go through that!

 

My MIL died before I even met DH, so no comments--good, bad or otherwise--here.

janjag

think it was me who suggested this thread.  but no fair!  my MIL is a bit out there, but not rude... really had my own mom in mind.  so forgive me if i add to the list, but throw my own mom under the bus. 

when girls were 10wks old (deep in the trenches) mom came to visit from canada to "help".  one morning she was watching babies and i was in my room sleeping for a whole hour (maybe 45min), which was a rare thing.  i heard loud crying and stumbled out of my room into the living room. 

audrey was in bouncy, crying.  my mother says, "she spit up so i had to take her shirt off, and now she's naked!  and she's starving to death!"  now, to say it, i LMAO.  obviously the child is not starving, and she was wearing a diaper.  but being delirious as i was, and hearing the utter panic in my mother's voice, i was like, "give her a bottle, now!"  my mom does not have a calming effect.  oh, and do you think i'd mentioned ten times that day that audrey needs to have a bib on at all times... reflux mom.

ahhhh, that kind of felt good

joliemariée

First thing my MIL says to me when she shows up for 2 weeks (!) when the twins were 10days old - " WOW, you still look Pregnant" and then said it to me again several days later..... FWIW, I had lost all but 10lbs w/in a week of my delivery and yes, my belly was still bloated 2 weeks after a c/section  - like most post partum women!!! I counted the seconds until she left town!!!!

hcastiaux

gumiberg:

well, its not so much what she said but what she did.  when the babies were 4 days old (we just got home from the hospital) she came to visit.  she was appalled that we were not using a diaper changing table but instead a mat on a dresser.  she called us every day thereon after to tell us our babies would roll off the dresser and die. 

about a week later we got a visit from a CPS officer.  she had filed like 10 reports us against us.  the first was the diaper changing table...i guess when they didnt act on that alone, she made up a bunch of other stuff (like that we would get drunk and suffocate the babies in their sleep).  such BS!!

needless to say, she is mentally ill.  but i havent seen her much since (maybe 5 times?) so her opportunity to say rude things to me is very slight.

Are you freaking joking me?!?!  That is insane!!!

LightBlue

gumiberg:

well, its not so much what she said but what she did.  when the babies were 4 days old (we just got home from the hospital) she came to visit.  she was appalled that we were not using a diaper changing table but instead a mat on a dresser.  she called us every day thereon after to tell us our babies would roll off the dresser and die. 

about a week later we got a visit from a CPS officer.  she had filed like 10 reports us against us.  the first was the diaper changing table...i guess when they didnt act on that alone, she made up a bunch of other stuff (like that we would get drunk and suffocate the babies in their sleep).  such BS!!

needless to say, she is mentally ill.  but i havent seen her much since (maybe 5 times?) so her opportunity to say rude things to me is very slight.

 

That's crazy!  You win for sure!

 At MIL's last visit she commented that I've lost a lot of weight, kinda obvious but I thanked her and said that I've lost 45 lbs of the baby/water weight.  She asked how much I gained and I told her 60lbs and she gasp and told me she thought I gained WAY more than that and I looked like a "beached whale" when she visited when I was 36 weeks.  Ummm thanks... I'm happy she lives 4 1/2 hrs away.

BelleBaby

Over the weekend, my DH and I told MIL specifically not to do something with the boys and she did it anyway.  DH told her about it and she said "Well, it makes me happy."  Guess what nut job?  IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU!!!!!!!!!  She's so selfish sometimes I can't stand it.  She never respects our wishes about what we want done (or not done) with the boys.  And she wonders why we never ask her to babysit.

caden

Wow, these are bad!

MrsKario

MIL - when I had my first IVF fail she comes over to our house and starts crying and carrying on about how hard it was for her when SIL ( her daughter) went through IVF.  SIL at this point had 2 beautiful kids - I had no biological children and was devasted.  I had to spend time and energy comforting her when my own heart was broken from my IVF failure

My own mom - Last year I had a M/C in October.   For Christmas my mom wraps my gift in "Babies First Christmas" wrapping paper.  When I started crying she told me that it was an oversight.  She didnt think the wrapping paper was a big deal and that she never thinks about the M/C and the wrapping paper being hurtful never occured to her.  This was 2 months after a  fcking M/C and the M/C was after IVF #2.  OUCH!  My mother might be the most insensitive and clueless person on the face of this earth.

mrs.cam

whoa MrsKario - talk about insensitive!  geez. 

the worst my MIL said was that she "can't wait to see me get fat".  (I'm thin but my MIL and SIL are on the bigger side)  I actually though it was kind of funny.  More motivation for after the birth!

lisa&andy

I will say that I love my MIL and she has never said anything rude or at least not to my face, but it drives me crazy that she calls them "her babies". She started this with DD when DS went to the NICU for a month and I was a hormonal mess with a newborn at home and one 1.5 hours away. She does it still, but thankfully not as often.

MiaVonT

umm wooooowwww .... some of you guys have it bad

 

My MIL is always saying she knows how hard it is and I need to lighten up and "I know how it is  ... I had two LOs" ..... 

 

um yeah  a lil over a yr apart .... NOT the same as twins but she thinks they are

 

oh, "and if mommy don't treat them with they'll come live with Grandma ... cuz Grandmas have rights" ... while I am sitting right there .... BIOTCH better check her rights ... she really has NONE

efhoping2010

Wow, I am amazed at your MIL stories.  Yikes

Well since our twins are not here yet my MIL comment has to do with when after a long time trying we found out that DH had no sperm, azoospermia due to being born without a vas deferens.  And this is what she said to him when we were dealing with that utter devastation, "Maybe God does not want you to have children"

 Ouch! 

hayatiggs

I love my MIL and I'm fortunate that we get along very well, but she is the kind of person who says exactly what she's thinking, and doesn't think about it hurting anyone's feelings. I don't think she would ever intentionally try to upset me, she just doesn't think.

Hubbo and I were having dinner at her house one night and we started discussing baby names (I knew where it was gonna go, I tried to avoid it, lol). Hubbo brought up a name that I really kind of liked, and MIL immediately made a disgusted face and said, "Eww, no! Gross!" That just rubbed me the wrong way. Every time after when names were brought up, she would say, "That's so much better than that other awful name.." I have since made it clear to hubbo that we will not be discussing names with anyone other than each other. Everyone else will find out the babies' names when they're born