Worried about the future

Angelica411

As if being a mom didn't already have its lists of worries, but now I worry about my future grandchildren.  I wonder if my daugher will breastfeed her children, if my son will urge his wife to do so, if my kids will let their children cry it out, or if they'll spank their children.  These are all important issues with me, and now I worry for my future grandkids! 

tak2002

You've got a long way to go before you need to actively worry about that! Hopefully our culture will embrace breastfeeding more so by the time our kids become parents! As for everything else...maybe by your lead they will just know it's the right thing to do. Enjoy your present and be the best mom you can be right now!!

ClaireBennett

Umm... weird to be worried about that right now.  There are lots of things to worry about for your own kids, let alone your KIDS kids.  One step at a time, haha.

BNBB08

ClaireBennett:

Umm... weird to be worried about that right now.  There are lots of things to worry about for your own kids, let alone your KIDS kids.  One step at a time, haha.

This.  But I'm also notorious for worrying about things I shouldn't be worrying about so I understand.  Also, the way you raise your kids greatly affects how they will raise theirs...based on my own observations at least. 

anna7602

Oh, wow. Hadn't even thought about grandchildren yet, but at the rate we're going, I will probably be very old by the time I have any and probably more concerned about where I've put my dentures and whether I can remember the grandkids' names.

KimberJEB

I think about stuff like that sometimes.  Not actively worrying, but definitely slightly concerned as to how I will handle life if/when Jack is a TOTALLY different parent than I am.

MAtoNC

Angelica411:

As if being a mom didn't already have its lists of worries, but now I worry about my future grandchildren.  I wonder if my daugher will breastfeed her children, if my son will urge his wife to do so, if my kids will let their children cry it out, or if they'll spank their children.  These are all important issues with me, and now I worry for my future grandkids! 

I think it is hard for any grandparent to step back and allow their children to parent in their own way. That being said, keep in mind that we learn to parent, in part, based on the experiences we have with our own parents--and if they are good experiences, then we emulate those, and we seek advice from our parents when we have our own children.

My mother breastfed my two sisters. Growing up, to me--that is just what a mommy did. She told me why she breastfed them (she wasn't able to with me because I was her first, a preemie, and no one helped her learn or pump her milk or anything while she was in the hospital). I just always knew that I would breastfeed my own child, too.

There are even more examples of how my mother's parenting influences my own, but you get the picture. The kind of parent you are will help your child become the kind of parent they will be.

7river7wed7

Well, just like you did, your kids will make these decisions for themselves despite what grandma thinks -- and they should. That said, the best thing you can do is lead by example. If they can reflect on their childhood and remember how you did things and that it worked, they will be likely to mimic your choices.

BabyMama1979

Don't worry. My whole life, my mom told me about me sleeping in my crib in my parents room until I was four and being breastfed until I was 2. My mom and I are best friends now. I knew I wanted to do whatever she did because "I turned out so well" haha. Your kids will be happy with all your hard work and feel the need to repeat it for their own kids...although daughter in laws may be trick!

Lotte134

7river7wed7:

Well, just like you did, your kids will make these decisions for themselves despite what grandma thinks -- and they should. That said, the best thing you can do is lead by example. If they can reflect on their childhood and remember how you did things and that it worked, they will be likely to mimic your choices.

Very good answer.  

Hopefully you can move on to worrying about things that ARE in your control.  

sparky88

Oh, I definitely think ahead like you (to a fault, admittedly).   Keep focusing on the present & how you parent your kids. 

erbear

Well, the good news is those things aren't your decision, so nothing to worry about

KKMMex

erbear:

Well, the good news is those things aren't your decision, so nothing to worry about

I agree.  You'll have zero control over decisions like this regarding your grandchildren. 

Traycee1242

You can worry all you want, but those things are none of your business.