and i actually turned in my rented pump to the hospital today.
i feel pretty good physically, but so unbelievably guilty. i have enough BM frozen to last another month or 2. i just feel like they're preemies; i should have kept pumping. i felt so bad today i seriously considered trying to re-lactate.
but between working full-time and law school 3 nights a week, pumping didn't leave much time with the babies.
did anyone else feel this way? is this normal or am i totally crazy?
Re: i haven't pumped since monday
I BF'd for like 2 minutes on each side this morning for the first time since Saturday (and only because my boobs were killing me)....so I am feeling similarly....but I have to admit that I am also happy that I can eat whatever I want now (G has a milk allergy so I had to watch my dairy). I'm glad I stuck with it as long as I did but yes, I have some sadness too. I didn't expect AT ALL to be as attached to it as I became.
But, there are going to be lots of firsts, lasts, and phases for the next 18+ years so I'm just trying to keep that in mind and actually see it as positive progression instead of missing it.
Hang in there!!
Married 8.13.2005, M/C 12/8/06- 5 weeks, M/C 2/27/07- 7 weeks, M/C w/ D&C 8/10/09-6.5 weeks *Charles Lawrence born 5/2/08 @ 3:14am, 7lb 8oz, 20.5 inches. Clomid, Crinone and baby aspirin. *Alexandra Claire born 9/14/10 @ 9:52am 6lb 14oz, 20.5 inches. Femara, Crinone and baby aspirin.
I went through those guilty phases as I almost quit a few times. But once I decided to quit for good, I had no guilt. There just wasn't time in the day, and if I did find time, one or both babies would scream the minute I got hooked up. I feel okay with my decision, but couldn't say that a few weeks ago.
You did amazing. Seriously. I only lasted 7 weeks. Don't feel guilty! It's so hard with twins!
After 2 rounds of IVF & 2 rounds of FET, we were blessed with identical twin girls!
Megan Hope 2yrs 3months
i guess we're both crazy. your daughter is beautiful, BTW.