TTC after 35

Hi, I'm a newbie - anyone else have trouble TTC #2?

DH and I are currently TTC #2 and have been for a little over a year.  My DD is 21 months old.  I guess I'm more just posting for support, since anyone I know IRL just doesn't seem to get it, especially since I've had one baby we're getting all the "so where's #2?" questions. I guess most people assume if you got pg once it should be a snap the second time!

We started TTC #1 when I was 37, got pregnant with DD in 9 cycles.  But this time no luck. I'm now 40 (ugh, it hurts to type that!)  I've had the blood tests, tried clomid, both 50 and 100 mg, no luck.  My hormone levels always come back normal, except once my progesterone was a bit low.  Our next step is to have DH tested and possible IUI. 

I guess it just hit me like a ton of bricks today after I talked to my OB's NP about getting DH tested.  Until now I guess I just figured it will happen, just be patient.  But now I can't stop thinking that maybe it won't, and we're just meant to have one, and that makes me so sad.  I love DD more than anything in the world, I just never thought we'd be "one and done". We're willing to explore IUI, but more extreme/invasive measures (ie IVF) aren't an option, financially or otherwise.

Anyone else here working on #2 (or 3, etc)?

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Re: Hi, I'm a newbie - anyone else have trouble TTC #2?

  • Hello and welcome.  We are working on #1 and I am just starting cycle #9.  We got a BFP on cycle #7 but had an early M/C.  I have not started any testing or treatment yet, but obviously its up for discussion with my DH.  We haven't decided yet how far we are willing to go medically TTC, mostly because we don't know what is all out there and how much it all costs and how invasive it is.  We have a lot to learn.  We are hoping to get a BFP again in the next couple of cycles, if not, we will be checking in with an RE I imagine.

    Good luck with your journey. 

    I give up trying to get a ticker.  I have a DD that is 2.5 years old and is awesome.  Maybe I'll add a quote to distinguish myself.  Hmmm.  How about...

    "It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn't use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like "What about lunch?" - A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh
  • you should check out the Secondary IF board. i'm sure a lot of people there can offer you advice.

     DH and I were the opposite actually. it took us 2 years to conceive DD#1 and that was through our 1st ever IVF. Since we didn't have any children at all at that point and knew what our insurance covered, we were basically willing to move heaven and earth to have the family we so desperately wanted.

      By a miracle we are now pregnant naturally with DD #2 after one failed IVF and only 3 cycles of trying on our own. best of luck with whatever you decide to do.

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  • Fishtail-

    I could have written your post!  Except we took 3 years to get PG with #1. My DD is 22 months and we too are getting the "when are we gonna have a little brother" It drives me crazy! Usually when I tell people it's hard for us to get PG they shut up about it. Everyone (including my Dr.) told me it shouldn't be as hard to conceive #2 but we choose not to go on BCP after my LO was born hoping for another spontaneous pregnancy, so far, no good. We have had 3 failed IUI's and like you, are unsure about IVF. Here's hoping that all positives on this board rub off on us and welcome!!! 

    PS-Your DD is so cute!!!!  

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    IF History in my Bio!

  • Yep...I'm having TTC #2.  #1 was a PG on our first try.  I was 36, DH 40.  I'm now kicking myself for waiting too long.  But I guess I just wasn't ready at the time for #2.  We've both gone through all the etsrting and all was good.  I think I just have old eggs.  I'm now 41.  We are meeting with a new RE on 4/8 to discuss TTC #2.

    Welcome to the board:)

  • Hi - I don't post all that often, but recently have been checking out this board since we have decided to start TTC #2. This is our first month trying, and looks like we will be trying again next month. With DD, I charted, took temps, the whole thing. I dont' really want to do that again, but we'll give just using the ovulation tests to see how things turn out...and if after a few months nothing happens, maybe I'll try the charting before speaking with a dr since now I am considered high risk at 36.
    Jen, married 09.07.07
    Sydney, born 11.26.08
  • Welcome!  I'm sorry TTC #2 has been such a long journey for you.  (((hugs)))

    I wouldn't say I'm having trouble TTC #3, but it's definitely taking longer than I expected based on past experience.  I worry that my c-sections or IUD might have caused problems for me and I'm not sure how far I'm willing to go.  It's such a roller coaster!  I don't feel like I'm done either, but I'm not sure how far we're willing to go.  #2 is almost 3 y/o and #1 and #2 are close in age, I really don't want the 3rd to be so far apart. 

    GL, I hope you get some answers and things turn around soon.

    DS1 age 7, DD age 5 and DS2 born 4/3/12
  • Hi, we started trying for #2 last month.  My DD is almost 2.  We're in the middle of moving right now, so it's been tough to chart and with all the stress my cycles have been all over the place.  A lot of my friends have struggled with secondary IF, so it's definitely on my mind.

    I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling, but I think you will find the secondary IF board very helpful.

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