Do you get wistful and a little bit envious when others announce a pregnancy or have a new baby? I totally do! I had my tubes tied with this last pregnancy, because we just can't afford more children. I don't especially love pregnancy while pregnant, and post-partum is a cruel, cruel joke from Mother Nature. But there's something so special about finding out your pregnant and everything that follows(first ultrasound, big ultrasound, feeling kicks, going into labor, newborn babies etc) that makes me just a little BSC when I find out someone I know is expecting. I could totally see myself becoming Michelle Dugger(with better hair, tyvm) had I not closed down my baby-factory. Scary!
Re: If you are done having kids...
Yeah, I definitely feel envious still.
We just decided this month to stop TTC, so I imagine I'll feel that way for awhile. But focusing on the positive of not having to go through another pregnancy/c-section/post-partum makes it easier to deal with.
Wow. I could have written this post--minus the tubal, and maybe Michelle Duggar
. And while we could afford a third, MH is done after 2. I'm at peace with two, (but could have been talked into a third) but I can completely relate to all your feelings on this!!!!
No!!! I mean, I reminisce about the experience and since I loved being pregnant, I remember how it felt and how much I enjoyed it. But I dont get envious or think about what it would be like to have another. We both feel complete with the two we have and I have zero desire or urge to have more.
Please dont take this the wrong way, because I mean nothing snarky or mean by this, but it sounds like you didnt WANT to be done having kids but got a tubal because of your current finances. I'm not saying that was wrong, but it might be something to talk to someone about if the wistful or slightly envious feelings become more intense. Sorry to spew that out there when your feelings are probably very mild, but I know someone who recently dealt with the same type of situation and talking to a counselor has helped her tremendously.
That last sentence made me snort!!! I watch Say Yes to the Dress and love watching them pick out their bridal dresses. I didn't even do that when I got married. I ordered it online. So I understand.
I really miss being PG, so I understand. I'm divorced and in my late 30s. I can't afford another one, and I don't have the energy. I knew right after #2 that I was done.
#1 was a preemie, so I did not get to experience things the way I had hoped (didn't even have the baby shower yet, long stay in hospital, NICU, wasn't ready to be done being PG!, etc.) With #2, I was so busy with #1 that I didn't get to enjoy it as much as I would have liked. #2 was born a little early also.
So for me, I think I just like being PG and all of the excitement of everything is what I really miss.
No.
Not even a bit.
When I hold teeny babies, it's nice, but I'm happy to give them back and chase after my little men.
Don't get me wrong, I like the *idea* of a third kid and if I could have had one and not have to be pregnant or nurse, and he would be automatically 2 years old, then maybe.
But, no. In fact, I see pregnant women and I think "Thank goodness that's not me.".
Me with my littlest.
I definitely feel unsure sometimes about not having a third. I think well, there is only one time in my life I have to make the decision, and I can't go back on it (after a certain point.)
But I hate hate hate pregnancy! I don't want to ever be pregnant again! If we ever change our minds or win the lotto or something and I have a third I just don't know how I'd survive it. I had so many bad ultrasounds the last time around that it stresses me out to even see an ultrasound machine. We have a CD with lullabys on it and at the end there are some "soothing" white noise sounds...one is the fetal heart beat sound and I can't listen to it because I feel literally anxious/sick when I hear that sound. I hate all of it...getting so big (I gained a ton of weight in pregnancy), the anxiety, the attention.... I think I actually get pre-partum depression, lol.
So I don't get jealous when I see a pregnant person but I do feel wistful when I see families with three kids, and we are surrounded by them.
I'm sorry you regret your decison! I hope with time you feel better about it. Hugs!