What type of counseling do you think would be most beneficial?

2bWednDec

I DD'd my last post.  As I mentioned, I want some type of professional opinion on how/when/if I should bring up to my LO that her bio family has a bad background that is fairly intense with lot of criminal activity, etc. 

I found a class I can take through an agency...it's a one day class that discusses that topic (well it's about discussing bfamily with your LO) and is $125.

Or I found a support group that is 6 sessions long, same price but would have other general topics too...may be a little too general.

Lastly, for the one day class, the adoption therapist that is leading it has her own practice and I can go make an appointment with her.  I'm not sure how many sessions I'd need ...I'd anticipate maybe up to 5 at most?  That would likely run $600 or more.  She is adopted herself so I kind of like that aspect of it.

Of course I can do a combination of these things... but if you were me, where would you start?  I'm slightly irritated that my agency heavily claimed they offer this support post fost/adoption at no charge and now they suddenly charge an arm and a leg.  But it would be worth it obviously if I get something out of it.

foundmylazybum

2bWednDec:

I DD'd my last post.  As I mentioned, I want some type of professional opinion on how/when/if I should bring up to my LO that her bio family has a bad background that is fairly intense with lot of criminal activity, etc. 

I found a class I can take through an agency...it's a one day class that discusses that topic (well it's about discussing bfamily with your LO) and is $125.

Or I found a support group that is 6 sessions long, same price but would have other general topics too...may be a little too general.

Lastly, for the one day class, the adoption therapist that is leading it has her own practice and I can go make an appointment with her.  I'm not sure how many sessions I'd need ...I'd anticipate maybe up to 5 at most?  That would likely run $600 or more.  She is adopted herself so I kind of like that aspect of it.

Of course I can do a combination of these things... but if you were me, where would you start?  I'm slightly irritated that my agency heavily claimed they offer this support post fost/adoption at no charge and now they suddenly charge an arm and a leg.  But it would be worth it obviously if I get something out of it.

It seems like you have some good specific questions (if I remember correctly from the OP) of your concerns. Is there a number other than the agency you can call to ask the person leading the sessions about them?

Also, you might want to call the therapist too. I *believe* that a *typical* counseling time frame is between 4-8 sessions (Lilfish might know for sure if she pops back in). You want to ask how they take payment. Some take insurance and some don't. Some do a sliding scale and some don't. If they take insurance--ask how they will bill it (regarding the DSM--if that is how they do it) 

Lastly--have you mentioned to your agency that you were under the impression that these things would be free at the time and now you are confused as to why they are now of cost? Is that written anywhere? Even on a brochure that you can show them? I'd be irritated too and if you can find it written--I'd show them and at least make them explain it!  

lilmufish

I DD'd my last post.  As I mentioned, I want some type of professional opinion on how/when/if I should bring up to my LO that her bio family has a bad background that is fairly intense with lot of criminal activity, etc. 

Agreed. I think you're down the right path... 

I found a class I can take through an agency...it's a one day class that discusses that topic (well it's about discussing bfamily with your LO) and is $125.

That might be what you're looking for.  This would probably provide you with a question/answer format at the end, and if they didn't meet your concerns or needs during the actual workshop i'm sure you could ask at that point.  This would be my first option for your original statement of wanting a professional opinion of how/when/if you should bring it up. 

Or I found a support group that is 6 sessions long, same price but would have other general topics too...may be a little too general.

While these are good for perhaps general topics, sounds like you have something more specific in mind.  You may get something out of these groups, but I still like the first option first. 

Lastly, for the one day class, the adoption therapist that is leading it has her own practice and I can go make an appointment with her.  I'm not sure how many sessions I'd need ...I'd anticipate maybe up to 5 at most?  That would likely run $600 or more.  She is adopted herself so I kind of like that aspect of it.

With therapists, we're encouraged to not self disclose. In that, I mean, that the person is paying $$ to come work through their issues not hear our story. I cringe when I hear therapists who promote themselves as a rape survivor, or in this case as someone who is adopted themselves... I mean, personally? I could reach out to couples with infertility or couples who are adopting...and I do - but not as someone who's been in their shoes... ethically, that changes the professional relationship. Now you have a different view of her.

As far as the cost goes...alot of therapists (i do) have what's called a sliding scale, in which they realize that alot of individuals who seek out counseling cannot afford 90 dollars an hour. So they offer for a little lower.  I do it by income / # of household members...other therapists do it other ways.  But that might be an option if 600 dollars is alot...you may be able to get that lower. 

Other ways to lower the costs of therapy....like an above poster said, trying EAPs might work.  But they limit the sessions and they're not normally specialized in anything.  But they are there, and they're nice when you just need someone to listen and help guide you down the right path.

You may be able to use your own insurance company for counseling - but just as a heads up...insurance companies REQUIRE a diagnosis, and so therefore the therapist will have to some how "come up with a diagnosis" of adjustment disorder or *SOMETHING* in order for them to bill.  That's why I don't use insurance, because I don't like giving out a diagnosis unless it helps the client..but I digress.

 Of course I can do a combination of these things... but if you were me, where would you start?  I'm slightly irritated that my agency heavily claimed they offer this support post fost/adoption at no charge and now they suddenly charge an arm and a leg.  But it would be worth it obviously if I get something out of it.

 I would contact the agency, the head of the agency and state what you just said. That you're irritated and saddened that they claimed they offered x for zero amt and now you're having to pay for it.  The squeaky wheel gets the grease.  Start with a phone call, then an email, then a letter..then a visit. Personally, I'd bug them until I got what I want...but that's just because I'm cheap and I don't like paying for things that I thought I was going to receive for free...especially something that is expensive and very valuable to my family.

As far as what an above poster mentioned about the length of counseling...Counseling will last as long as the client needs it. I've had some clients who are with me for 6-8 weeks, others will last ALOT longer than that (Years).  That is something you would discuss with a therapist - your goals and your action plan / treatment plan.   I would not go into it saying I'm going to use x amount, I would go into it saying I need to work on x goals, and once I obtain those goals I can terminate. I would say the first session you attend is an intake session going over paperwork, getting to you know you type of thing.  Then, the next 1-2 are evaluation and assessment sessions. Then the real meat of counseling begins    But it sounds like you have an issue/presenting problem in mind so counseling of 6-8 weeks might actually be realistic. Keep in mind though, if you're wanting to discuss adoption, your feelings around the adoption, parenting, etc that might need more sessions. 

And remember, your sessions can be how you want them. They can be twice a week, once a week, once every other week, once a month, etc. There is no set time limit between sessions

PM me if you have any...concerns....comments...funny jokes or questions. I'll do my best to check in