when to have the baby shower

holistr33

im pregnant with my third im almost 22 weeks right now, but i dont know when to have a shower cuz i have to have a c-section and dont know when my doc will do it. with my daughter i had a small one after she was born with my son my mom tried to do a small one but no one came so when is the right time to have one this time sense i have to have a c-section.

lmpdjc

I don't think a shower is appropriate for your 3rd child.  Unless there are 10 or more years between your last baby and this new one.  Since you have a boy and a girl, I assume you should be all set with hand-me-downs.

k.martell

I think no one came to the 2nd baby's shower because most women find showers for anything but the first baby tacky. 

Personally, I wouldn't go to a 2nd or 3rd baby shower, I am in the "tacky" group.  You can do a Meet & Greet after the baby is born, but don't ask or expect gifts.  As the PP said, you should have everything by now unless there is a large gap in the kids or divorce/re-married type thing.

debbadebbadoo711

I don't think there is anything wrong with celebrating a second or third child, especially if it's done with tact.  Celebrate and enjoy!  You deserve it!!  

holistr33

well with my daughter and my son when they grow out of stuff i give it to friends who have younger who fit it then they hand it down so i have nothin left for a new born.and this one was not planned and my husband was laid off so we have no spare money to buy stuff right now. so ya this one is needed and i dont know wat im havin and if its a girl i have absolutely nothin cuz my daughter is 3.

holistr33

debbadebbadoo711:

I don't think there is anything wrong with celebrating a second or third child, especially if it's done with tact.  Celebrate and enjoy!  You deserve it!!  

 

congrates on ur baby

holistr33

k.martell:

I think no one came to the 2nd baby's shower because most women find showers for anything but the first baby tacky. 

Personally, I wouldn't go to a 2nd or 3rd baby shower, I am in the "tacky" group.  You can do a Meet & Greet after the baby is born, but don't ask or expect gifts.  As the PP said, you should have everything by now unless there is a large gap in the kids or divorce/re-married type thing.

 

 

no one came to the second cuz it was not enough time and was a weekday so all my family had to work thank u very much.

cutekissis101

a shower for your third? Also I don't think you get to decide when the hostess does......

DaniLovesPink

Okay, I don't want to be rude, but I'm going to be blunt: maybe no one came to your second shower because they didn't think it was appropriate for a second child.  Unless there is at least 5 years between your last child and this child, you truly lack the supplies you need and this child is a different gender (which, it clearly isn't, since you already have a boy and a girl), I would think a shower to be overkill.

If you want to celebrate baby, plan a "Welcome Baby" party after it's born and do not expect, request or make any mention of gifts.  But, again, considering no one came to your last shower, I'm venturing to say people may not have a huge interest in attending this one, either.

DaniLovesPink

holistr33:

well with my daughter and my son when they grow out of stuff i give it to friends who have younger who fit it then they hand it down so i have nothin left for a new born.and this one was not planned and my husband was laid off so we have no spare money to buy stuff right now. so ya this one is needed and i dont know wat im havin and if its a girl i have absolutely nothin cuz my daughter is 3.

Then maybe you should go to the friends you gave the hand-me-downs to and say, "I really hate to ask, but since we're having another baby and gave all of our stuff away, I was wondering if you had anything left you could pass back my way?"  Or, let your friends know that you're in need of hand-me-down or used baby items and that you would be willing to pay garage sale prices for that stuff.  If you helped them, they should be willing to help you.  Otherwise, instead of having a shower and relying on other people to buy what you need for the child you're having, check local resources that can provide you with free or inexpensive clothing, carseat and crib, you can do WIC for formula and then all you'll need is diapers.

samakasrc

k.martell:

I think no one came to the 2nd baby's shower because most women find showers for anything but the first baby tacky. 

Personally, I wouldn't go to a 2nd or 3rd baby shower, I am in the "tacky" group.  You can do a Meet & Greet after the baby is born, but don't ask or expect gifts.  As the PP said, you should have everything by now unless there is a large gap in the kids or divorce/re-married type thing.

I agree - maybe you should consider doing a "meet the baby" after like a few other people said... that way you still honor the coming of the new baby, but gifts and such aren't expected.

joanithegreat

In our family we usually have the shower after the baby is born, because a) some of us think it is bad luck to have it before the baby is born. and b) it is a chance for everyone to meet the baby. 

k.martell

holistr33:

well with my daughter and my son when they grow out of stuff i give it to friends who have younger who fit it then they hand it down so i have nothin left for a new born.and this one was not planned and my husband was laid off so we have no spare money to buy stuff right now. so ya this one is needed and i dont know wat im havin and if its a girl i have absolutely nothin cuz my daughter is 3.

I highly suggest Craigslist or a local Gently Used Baby store.   I have a Once Upon a Child near buy and I have bought a lot of great used items for dirt cheap.  I have also bought furniture and other great items from Craigslist.

mcs7505

I think showers after the first is a very regional or family thing.  I know in my family it isn't done, but we have offered to have one for my SIL, they have 5 kids now.  We offered to throw ones for baby #4 and #5. SIL declined, but I think if someone offers to throw a shower, and it is an acceptable in your group of family and friends, there is nothing wrong with it.

I am having my shower at 30 weeks, mostly due to scheduling conflicts from that time to when I am due.  That gives me enough time to buy what is still needed and get everything organized.

denise_m

debbadebbadoo711:

I don't think there is anything wrong with celebrating a second or third child, especially if it's done with tact.  Celebrate and enjoy!  You deserve it!!  

I agree.  You can have a shower and tell people straight out that gifts are not expected.  Every life should be celebrated.

lmpdjc

denise_m:

debbadebbadoo711:

I don't think there is anything wrong with celebrating a second or third child, especially if it's done with tact.  Celebrate and enjoy!  You deserve it!!  

I agree.  You can have a shower and tell people straight out that gifts are not expected.  Every life should be celebrated.

The whole point of her having a shower is for the gifts.  She said baby was a "surprise" and DH was laid off, so they needed other people to provide for the baby.

cutekissis101

lmpdjc:

denise_m:

debbadebbadoo711:

I don't think there is anything wrong with celebrating a second or third child, especially if it's done with tact.  Celebrate and enjoy!  You deserve it!!  

I agree.  You can have a shower and tell people straight out that gifts are not expected.  Every life should be celebrated.

The whole point of her having a shower is for the gifts.  She said baby was a "surprise" and DH was laid off, so they needed other people to provide for the baby.

Yeah if no one brings gifts its not a baby shower. Its just a party.

lilygirl

lmpdjc:

I don't think a shower is appropriate for your 3rd child.  Unless there are 10 or more years between your last baby and this new one.  Since you have a boy and a girl, I assume you should be all set with hand-me-downs.

I agree.

And, punctuation much?

debbadebbadoo711

holistr33,

Congrats to you as well!! I wish you the best of luck!

holistr33

i dont need anyone to provide for my kids its just nice to have some *** before they r born thank u very much but my kids r fine.

JNREESE217

You should just have a diaper shower now.  Since its your 3rd... you probably already have most of the stuff you'll need.  I say do it now while you're still comfortable!!