I wonder how many people do this!!

Ya Never Know

So, yesterday, DH tells me that a co-worker of his is going to be trying for a baby with his wife. His friend's wife is 27, and his friend is 28, and they have never tried before.

Anyway, he says that they have been doing fertility testing.... And so I asked DH if she/they suspected something was wrong... and it turns out, they don't suspect anything, they haven't tried at all.... They just lied to the doctor and told him that they'd been trying for a year and it didn't work, and they wanted fertility testing etc.. right away.

That really rubs me the wrong way!!! I wonder how many ppl are doing this!! It's stupid people like this that make wait times ridiculous, and make it harder for people who actually need these appointments to get them.

Not to mention.... why would you put yourself through all that if there's no reason to believe there's anything wrong with you??

j_luvs_r

I will never understand that.  Why would you CHOOSE to be in the "trouble" TTC court?  It makes no sense.  Idiots.

summer_12

Yeah, that makes me mad, too.  It would never occur to me to lie to a doctor.

jteneback

Makes no sense, at all. Even less than people who think they are having trouble after just a few months. I don't think most people go this route. What a PITA.

Nicole0012

On the very rare occasion, someone might find out something is wrong before wasting a year trying... I remember SkyBee did this (I don't think she lied, though) and found out her DH's sperm count was zero. In her case, it was very fortunate she was able to test so early.

canthardlywait426

One of my friends- she says theyre trying right after the wedding in November. She said she'll give it 3 cycles and if shes not pg by then shes going in for testing. I told her they wont for a year and she said "we'll just lie. I know Im going to have trouble getting pg".

I had to hang up. She has no family history of issues, her periods are regular and "normal", she has been off of BC for a while already, her sister got accidently KU a couple months ago.

My other best friend said that she thinks its for the attention. Because her wedding will be over, if she doesnt get pg right away (and get the attention from that) that she has to play the IF card to get attention. I will never understand why people WANT to have problems. Or want to have testing. I hate it.

kellinc1

What is that quote that Gym has???  " Impatience is not an infertility issue".  (or something like that).  So stupid. not to mention, why would you want to pay out all of that money if you don't have to.

Ya Never Know

Nicole0012:

On the very rare occasion, someone might find out something is wrong before wasting a year trying... I remember SkyBee did this (I don't think she lied, though) and found out her DH's sperm count was zero. In her case, it was very fortunate she was able to test so early.

I think my biggest problem with my DH's friend's case in particular is that they haven't even started trying, they're doing this before they even give it a chance, and for no reason at all.

Estellankase

So stupid!  I would never lie to a doctor about something like that especially considering how invasive all the tests are!

Ya Never Know

piecesofflare:

When I had stopped ovulating again (at the beginning of our attempts to conceive, great) I went to a GP and asked for a referral to a gyno, because I knew I'd need meds to get back on track. (I was new to my city at the time and didn't have doctors locally.)  I had a full set of records of documented testing and trouble to back up the request, along with a really ugly chart.  He told me that I probably just 'missed a period' and 'was probably ovulating' and that if I wasn't pregnant in a year I should come back.

Even though just a year and a half before I'd had to go on BCP to end an 11 month cycle and start cycling again.  Idiot.

So even though we were only a couple months in, I lied to the GP and told him it had been a year so I could get the referral.  I disclosed everything honestly to my gyno, including that I'd lied to get the referral.  He told me I'd done the right thing because I was obviously not ovulating (I was into four months at this time) and based on my history, I needed a kickstart.  he got me going on provera and clomid, and two months later he had me in to see my RE.

If I hadn't lied to that idiot GP I'd probably just now be getting provera to kickstart my cycle. 

But - I had a diagnosed problem that was clearly flaring up again.  I don't advocate lying just for fun.  I'd rather just be jumping my husband and getting pregnant for free, than spending thousands of dollars a cycle to let someone try to impregnate me.

 

This is completely understandable though. You had a reason to believe that something was wrong. If DH's friend would have said she hadn't had a period in 4 months or something, then it wouldn't phase me.. it's that there's nothing wrong with her. She has absolutely no reason or suspicion to believe that she can't conceive.. she's just impatient. 

Temp878586125009588

ETA: My cousins wife was just like this!  They were only trying for three months then went on to testing and she had IVF (so she says) done. ( I swear she did it all for attention.)

minkys_silly_monkey

That is so stupid.  While we are on the subject of doing stuff for attention.  My ex best friend (who is also DH's cousion) is due in a few weeks.  All through this pregnancy she has nothing but try to get at attention.  She posts her stautes on FB like 20 times a day and it is all boo whoo I feel bad.  Oh and she told EVERYONE at five weeks the day they found out from the doc.  I mean she called aunts uncles that live over 800 miles away at 1030 at night that really dont like her.  She always does this type of thing (partly why we are not friends anymore).  Ok I am done now sorry for the vent.  I just really hate people like that.

williaw

WTF?

mrsf123

I have a family friend who has two kids. With both, after the first month of trying, she went to the RE to do testing.  BOTH times, the RE did some tests and told her she was already KU. Ridiculousness!

mchupie

Are you saying you wouldn't want to get expensive and painful testing done for no reason???

That is so stupid.

MrsB1010

PinkLove-S

Whoa. How strange, it seems like that would take so much longer to wait for. Heaven forbid they just have sex EOD. ::eye roll:: That would never even cross my mind!!!!

melissar617

After going to the ob/gyn for my yearly a few weeks ago and having the doctor tell me that he wouldn't do anything for another 4 months (until I had been ttc for 15 months), I wished that I had lied about how long it had been. But then I realized he didn't know what he was talking about in general, so I moved on and found a new dr.