Upstate NY Babies
would you leave a detailed schedule?
My mom is watching Ethan for the first time ever on Friday and Sunday while I work and dh is out of town. She hasn't watched a baby in probably 25 years. I was going to leave a list of phone numbers, his nap schedule, and what to feed him. Should I do it? What would you include?
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Re: would you leave a detailed schedule?
You know your Mom best, how would she take this information? I know that she is from out of town so the numbers are good but I wouldn't go over board. As long as you can be reached at work then the list should be short... My cell, Ped's office, maybe a neighbor
If you like keeping Ethan on a schedule and you think having someone watch him would throw him off then I would include a nap and feeding schedule.
As far as a what to feed him list...I don't think I would go into too much detail. Maybe just say as you are leaving that he loves x for a snack and it has been a while since he had y for lunch and it would be a treat.
I would. He will react better to someone new watching him if they follow his current routine. And it will be good for your mom to know when to expect him to be hungry/tired, etc.
I always leave detailed instructions, though I can tell they are rarely followed. All you can do is ask, I guess.
I did with my DD and the family friend watching her (neither of us have parents around).
I did everything - emergency numbers, wake time, nap time, bed time, all meals, snacks and snack time, and then a list of other info (like where to find things, what things are off limits, etc).
Of course even with my list, the person went way past nap time but it wasn't the end of the world...
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The most time that we have been gone has been a few hours for date nights, so I usually just give my Mom or MIL the general schedule verbally, and let them go from there. Evan does not really follow a strict schedule, so I give them round about times that he would need something. They have been around him enough to know his cues, for the most part. If we leave him for a whole day in the future, or with someone other than our Moms, I will most likely write a few things down.
The first time we left Jack with my ILs, I wrote EVERYTHING down. Maybe I got the nervous Mommy out of me with the puppy and now I am a little more relaxed about it.
We are always available by phone too, when we are not with him.
Yes, I would leave a detailed schedule. I always have one on hand when we leave DD with someone. I also have a laminated emergency contact list with all of our phone numbers,cell #'s,grandma and grandpas #'s, police direct line, poison control, local fire #, pedis #, insurance information, our next door neighbors #, and our home address with directions into our subdivision. Its very thorough. I'm sure your mom doesn't need all that, but its nice to have on hand.
You know, I left very detailed instructions when my parents watched Abby before the baby was born, and all I have left for Elizabeth was a sticky note with the times she needs to be fed. haha. But my parents have watched her a lot, like once a week or so ever since she was born either while I am working or just for a couple hours because my mom calls and "needs an elizabeth-fix". And she can always get me on my cell. And I do have the poison control number and the pedi's number on a 3x5 inside the bag I use for her bottles and milk.
But if anyone else were to watch her I would leave detailed instructions.
i'll be honest. I worry. Both days I am at work she will be with him for 10 hours, that is a long time to be with him. I know I am tired when it's my day off and we are stuck in the house all day. i know he isn't going to sleep b/c my mom won't just lay him down b/c she doesn't want to hear him cry
Some things won't change though just because you have it on a list. At least for my mom they won't. My mom thinks the reason she was falling asleep nursing at 6:30 tonight is because she played hard all day with her (I worked today). Uh, no, it is because when I asked you how the naps went, you said she "cat-napped". She also thinks she is doing me a favor by "saving my breast milk". Even though I would rather her just be fed on schedule. But then again, there isn't really a schedule if the child is cat-napping! So I have a few extra ounces in the freezer tonight and a child that went to sleep 1 1/2 hours earlier than the normal bedtime. We shall see what tonight holds.
But the way I look at it - she was well loved and safe. And ultimately that is all that matters. Her schedule's thrown off, so tonight's sleep may suck, or tomorrow may be rougher than normal. But it may also go fine. For now it works for us and I want my mom and dad to enjoy her and do the small things their own way as long as they are following my and DH's wishes on the big things (like they follow my wishes on no blankets when she is sleeping, to not use the free car seat they found at a garage sale, they don't sneak her food to see how she likes it).
My MIL watched Lorenzo last weekend and I left his schedule and a list of "how to trouble shoot"..she thought I was nuts but she hadn't watched a baby in 10 years..
I also left phone numbers, everything out that he could possibly want or need all laid out for her- so she didnt have to look for anything..
I should also add that a lot has changed over time, for example....
I left instructions on how to play the music in his room....it is a docked ipod. My dad and step mom had no clue how to turn it on!
R sleeps in a sleep sack, neither of them had seen one before (my sisters kids never used them). I had to show them how to put him in and zip it down, not rocket science but they didn't know how it worked.