Doulas... your thoughts and experience?

Legally Nads

 Hi Ladies, I'm coming over from the 2nd Tri board to seek your advice and expertise.I am considering a natural birth and am thinking about getting a doula, but DH is a little wary of the whole idea. Did any of you use a doula? What are your thoughts on doulas? Worth it? How did it go? How much (if you don't mind) did it cost? What did your DH or partner think about it?Anything else I should know?  Thanks Ladies! 

mdepping

Did any of you use a doula?   We had a doula

What are your thoughts on doulas?  I will be the first to admit that when I was first pregnant I couldn't understand why people hired doulas.  I am not a touchy feely person. However, I changed my mind during our birthing class which was taught by a local doula.  I have to admit that I am a believer now.  She was wonderful.  I don't know how DH or I would have made it through the process without her.  It was nice having her there to reassure DH and I that everything was ok and keep me comfortable.   

Worth it? Definitely, especially if this is your first.

How did it go?  With her help I was able to labor at home for a long time.  Once at the hospital she made sure I kept changing positions to help keep the labor progressing and kept me comfortable.  After the labor she took pictures of the baby, us and our nurses for us - something neither my husband or I would have been thinking of given all that was going on.  Then she stopped by our house a week later to make sure everything was going ok and to see if we had any questions concerning sleep, eating, etc.

How much (if you don't mind) did it cost?  I think her normal rate was $500.

What did your DH or partner think about it?  I am talking to my DH as I type.  He says it depends on the doula - make sure you interview a few doulas.  According to him "they don't really do much but at least there was someone there that knew what was going on."

GershiGirl

I had a doula and it was SOOOO worth it!  I planned on using the Hypnobabies program to help me achieve a natural birth and when it didn't work the way I had hoped my doula was there to help keep me calm and focused and to stop me from panicking.  My DH really liked her too... I think it was reassuring to both of us to know that we had an experienced person there who was completely on our side and who would guide us through the whole process.  Also I think it took some of the pressure off of DH... instead of worrying about what was happening or whether he was doing the right thing for me he could just be there for me and sort of follow the doulas cues about the best way to help me stay calm.

Where I live doulas are really expensive.  My doula normally charges $1200, but we negotiated it down to $1000.  That included two prenatal visits, the birth, and two postpartum visits.  I moved half way through my pregnancy and where I lived before I think doulas only charged around $500 so it really just depends on where you live I think.  If you want to go natural though I would highly recommend having a doula there... it was worth every penny to me!

jillms413

I did not use a doula but I attempted a natural birth without one and failed.  I was determined to go natural but ending up giving in at 7 cm and asked for an epidural which they gave me once I hit 8 cm. 

I truly believe the only reason why I asked for the epi was out of fear.  Up until that point, I was handling the contractions really well.  And that was while lying in bed strapped to a monitor.  Once I hit 7 cm, the contractions got more intense which is expected.  I knew in the back of my head that I was going through transition and that it would end soon.  But I was too afraid that I wasn't and that I would be stuck in that pain for hours.

I feel that if I had someone there encouraging me to go the last mile, it would have helped me make it through.  I also would have liked to have someone there suggesting different positions.  I took the childbirth class and practiced all of the positions but I completely forgot about them while I was in labor.  Like I mentioned, I was laying in bed the entire time.  Neither the nurse nor my DH were good at suggesting things to help.

Good luck with whatever you choose.  Now that I have gone through it, it is my opinion that a coach of some sort in addition to DH (whether that is a mother, doula, etc.) is key to successfully going natural.  Afterwards the doctor told me I was one of the calmest women in labor she has seen.  Even so, I wasn't able to do it with just DH.

 

lauraluft

We took a Bradley class and weren't going to use a doula (btw, I thought the bradley classes were the single best thing I did to help acheive a natural birth).  But as it got closer, we decided to have our instructor, who is also a doula, come with us. 

 

It was soooo worth it!  She freed up a set of hands so DH could be more involved and not have to spend so much time explaining our birth plan.  She was also really reassuring, reminding us of our options (let the water break on its own, for example) and reminding me how far along I was.  She also did the "dirty work" -- when a nurse couldn't find a vein for an IV (I was GBS+, so had to have antibiotics), she shot her a mean look and they got someone else who was more competent! 

 

It cost us the $250 for Bradley classes, and she came along for free after that, but I think doulas usually run about $400 in our area. 

 

I would really recommend interviewing and meeting with the doula regularly.  I think we really formed a good relationship with ours over the course of 12 bradley classes, so we were very comfortable with her. 

 

I think getting to know her really well made DH a lot more comfortable.  Also, we all understood our roles because of the classes, so DH knew she wouldn't be stepping on his toes, and he liked having her there as well.