Stress flashback

At1stsight

So since I've returned to work 3 days a week, I have to pump on those days. I'm really glad I've never had to supplement with formula for DS but my supply hasn't been great since returning to work. I usually have to use one or two bags from my freezer each week in addition to what I'm pumping. (I still have like 30 bags, so we're looking good for the next few months at least.) Needless to say, I'm anxious to save every drop.

Well today I spilled some milk I pumped this morning. It wasn't even a lot - like maybe 5-10 mL. I started crying, and was shaking the bottles trying to get every single drop into the storage bag. It reminded me of the early days in the NICU when I would use the syringe to get every freaking spec of colostrum out of the pump flange bc it was the only thing I felt like I could really do for Aldon. I HATED feeling that desperate for each drop of milk and swore it'd never be like that again. Thanks to a great supply once my milk was fully in, it never was, until recently. I know it seems silly to 'cry over spilled milk' but I figured you ladies would understand.

Jennyjenz

as someone who struggled with a very low supply (that eventually tanked) I do understand.  I cried every day of the NICU and for the first 2 months Georgia was home.  I knew the benefits of bm especially for my DD but just couldn't give enough to her.

hang in there!

mcdev

I can completely understand.  I had a very low supply for Keira.  Enough to get her through, but JUST enough.  Call it lack of sleep, stress, or whatever, but I spent an entire day's worth of pumping and accidently put in into the refrigerator rather than the freezer.  I didn't find it until two days later and it needed to be thrown out.  I cried my eyes out and just couldn't bring myself to do it.  I told DH to dump it and get rid of the bottles.  I couldn't even stand the thought of seeing the empty bottles.  He thought I was being ridiculous, and looking back I probably was, but at the time I felt horrible!  Hang in there!

g_belle

My supply dipped when I went back to work also.  I found that I needed to pump on a schedule just like I did while J was in the NICU.  That way my body could "anticipate" pumping times just like a feeding.  I put my pumping times on my Outlook calendar so that I don't have any meetings scheduled then.  Also if J's going through a growth spurt I usually have to add a pumping time in at night after he's in bed. 

Pumping is no fun but you can do it!  The working mom's board has tons of great advice about pumping if you're looking for even more support. 

 On a side note- my little man was also born at 34 weeks and 5 days