Baby Shower Issue (long)

Leelee06

Hey everyone.  I'm sorry I haven't been on much, but things are still busy and I've been sick and worn out! 

I need your thoughts on something...  A really good friend at work has been planning my work baby shower for about a month now.  She and I (when asked) have told a few people that she's working on it.  Well, another coworker, Miss B, asked me about it and told her that the friend is working on and to see her about it.  Well, she did not do this and has asked three other people to help out with the shower.  Mind you, I'm really not close to these four ladies and one of them has not offered the first congratulations or acknowledgment of my pregnancy (she also doesn't like friend).  The three others are ladies I speak to in passing or for just work things.  Honestly, I really don't know them and they don't know me.  So they have started planning things and completely left my friend out of it.  While it's very nice that they want to do this and I appreciate it so much, I am so disappointed that they are not including my friend.  She has been so excited about doing this for me and we've already picked out decorations and things.  I know it upset her, but now she says it's fine.  She's not one to make waves and I don't want to say anything to the others that would make her uncomfortable.  She feels like she got the shaft and is okay with letting them plan, but only because she's outnumbered.  So my question is should I tell Miss B to be sure to include friend in the planning since she has already put so much effort into it (I'm talking decorations, menu, cake...) or should I just let it be?  And aside from that, would any of you feel weird if people you barely knew threw you a shower?  I definitely feel weird about it, but am appreciative of their kindness towards me.

Temp206787500007404

Maybe you could ask the hostesses of your other shower to include your close work friend as a hostess there, so as not to cause problems at work?

Otherwise, I think the only option is for you to tell Miss B flat out that your friend was already making plans and is in charge.  And if they're interested in helping her, they should see her.

Mrs Lou

after my day today...my first reaction is tell Miss B to go away....but I know that is not nice...I think I would do as MrsB2007 suggested and just tell her that someone is already in charge...

 

mrssamuels2b

Tell Miss B that you've already started the process with your close friend and that you'll let her know that they're interested in helping her...Miss B seems pretty forward so you'll have to cut her off at the pass...just think it'd be hurtful to put your friend, who has helped you from the jump, on the back-burner for Miss B and her crew...

starsmaycollide

  Honestly, if I wasn't close to them, I wouldn't feel comfortable with them giving me a shower either.

Your friend  needs to tell them what she has already done for you -because they should realize it is easier on them as planners if she already has some things done, anyway, I'd hope.

Sorry this sounds awkward to deal with. But I definitely think your friend should get to do her part she wanted to do to begin with. 

sdkrlm

I would tell them that your friend really wanted to be a part of the planning and that you would like them to include her.

Leelee06

mrssamuels2b:

Tell Miss B that you've already started the process with your close friend and that you'll let her know that they're interested in helping her...Miss B seems pretty forward so you'll have to cut her off at the pass...just think it'd be hurtful to put your friend, who has helped you from the jump, on the back-burner for Miss B and her crew...

That's exactly what I don't want, but she keeps insisting that it's fine.  She would rather me not say anything to them and avoid causing any drama.  These are some defensive women and there will be some regardless.  You know what? My friend is always taking one for the team and I'm not going to let her do that this time.  They can help her if they want to but she'll run the show.  I wouldn't enjoy myself if she wasn't involved at all.  Thanks ladies! I appreciate your advice! 

stacy&marlon

I just posted withthe same topic..didn't realize you had already posted! I would be honest with the co-workers. I am trying to do that myself with friends.