Newbie w/some questions
Sorry - this is long, but I just found this board!
I had what seemed like PPD with my first (definitely depressed, suicidal-type thoughts, but no intention), was diagnosed when he was four months. I didn't have bonding issues, but actually the opposite - couldn't be away from him for a second, didn't trust anyone, paranoid and anxious about everything, but also feeling overwhelmed, couldn't sleep - I could go on and on.
Anyway, my doctor ran a blood test because I had lost so much weight and found that I my thyroid was out of whack. Put me on thyroid meds instead. Three weeks later I was SO much better, so he chalked it up to the thyroid. However, this also coincided with when DS was starting to sleep a little, reflux was under better control, and I was basically getting better at being a Mom.
This time, I am REALLY nervous about being depressed. I actually went through similar negative-type anxiety in my first tri. Still feel overwhelmed and depressed at times, but it freaks out DH, so I'm keeping it to myself. Feel SO guilty because my memory of caring for an infant is not pleasant and DH is not the most supportive (works a lot and most of the parenting falls to me, even though I also work full-time) so I am dreading the first six months. I don't want to be like that - how sad for my baby! I want to be excited, but I'm just not in any way.
Should I get some counseling now? My thyroid is checked every six weeks, and is under control, but I suspect that it wasn't just my thyroid. I don't even know how to find counseling - how do I find a good therapist for PPD? Does the above sound like PPD?
Thanks for listening.
Re: Newbie w/some questions
My therapist was on staff at the hospital I delivered at - recommended by my OB. Ask your OB for a rec.
As for the anxiety for the new baby - that's something that concerns me too - and I'm NOT pregnant! I think the best you can do now is get some counseling, see if you can work through your anxious feelings. You won't know what's going to happen until the baby gets here - you may get PPD, you may not. You may surprise yourself how well you handle everything!
Good luck to you - please keep us posted!