Thoughts on trying for 3rd child to have the opposite

jewelsonu

sex.  Say you have 2 boys or 2 girls and really wanted 1 of each.  Would you try for one more? We are done after this baby.  If I have 2 boys I will be happy.  I don't want to try one more time for a girl.  I kind of feel like that is saying to 2nd child sorry you weren't what we wanted so we are trying again. just wanted to see what others thought. 

BitsyKelly

I always thought that if I had two girls what we might go for the third and try to have a boy, but not the other way around (two boys).  The thought of possibly having three boys scared me...but we don't have to worry about that now.

Now that we have DD, it doesn't matter to me what #2 is, I will be happy with either, and we won't be going for a third. 

skroops

Well, I know that DH really wants a boy, both to carry on the family name and also because he just really wants that father-son relationship.  If we have a boy next, he would probalby be okay with stopping.  But I want at least 3 and probably 4 kids no matter what sex they are, so I would definitley keep trying for a boy if we have another girl (or two!). 

I would have never thought of the "sorry you weren't what we wanted so we are trying again" sentiment.  I really don't think there is anything wrong with wanting to have both a son and a daughter. 

Kim72508

We have no idea whether this baby is a boy or a girl yet but I think we'll be done after 2 no matter what. ?I just feel like 2 kids is enough for our family and we'll still be able to do all the extras (family vacations, contribute to college, weddings, etc) with having just 2 kids. ?If we had more than that then I'm not sure we'll financially be able to provide as of the extras as we'd like. ?

Cutemin

Absolutely, 100% NO!  Of course, who am I to talk having one of each.  But My DH's family did just that, kept having babies until they got a girl and were never ashamed to admit it.  #3 is a boy, (and there may have been 1 or 2 more boys that didn't make it, IL's make strange comments about a baby or two that were still born that were boys).  But MIL resented her third boy from the moment he was born a boy, she really doesn't like him and never has.  He has some serious issues as a result.  She even says she should have stopped after having her first two.  It is very sad and no person should ever be a disapointment to their parents the moment they are born.

emiliemetcalf

If we have another girl next time, I think we will adopt a boy depending on how labor and delivery goes.  I always thought I wanted at least 4 kids, but I am so afraid of delivery after what happened to my pelvis.  But if the next one goes smoothly, maybe I'll change my mind.  DH and his 4 siblings are adopted, so I know it is something he is interested in doing.

xKimx

I think I read somewhere that after having 2 of the same sex your chances of the 3rd being that same sex are "x%" higher (more than the 50/50).

That being said, I want 3 kids no matter what sex this bean may be. We're probably going to wait a few years in between though. We need a new house first, lol

Telyco

I think DH wants more kids and I think I want to stop. But I also think that if we had two boys I would try for a girl....not because I "need" to have a girl, but because DH wanted a daughter. Of course, we both are overjoyed with whatever kids we do have...but in terms of family planning I think we would try for the opposite sex one more time.

I do consider us very lucky to have two healthy kids, but also to have one of each...now we don't feel any pressure to "try for a girl"...we get to try for another baby if we choose.

MelissaSue81

We want at least 3.. If for some reason we have 3 girls.. we'll probably try for #4 to be a boy..but even if we had a mix.. we might try to have a 4th anyway.. so i dont know.

Jeff says he wants 2 girls and a boy.

olivia_eve

I've read that when couples have two girls they are more likely to have a third child so they can try for a boy, but when a couple has two boys the rate of trying for another is not as high. We are done after two kids, and that will not change based on gender. DH is totally fine with having another girl, and he even says that he would like another girl, so there would be no trying for a boy. I'm totally fine with having either gender next time around.

JenJar

This is a tough question.  I want 3 or 4 kids but DH only thinks he wants 2.  I would be super happy with another boy.  I love being a "boy-mama" and would love for G to have a brother.  But, I also really want a daughter.  I would love to have that mother-daughter relationship and our girl name, which we've kept a secret, has a lot of sentimental meaning in it and I would love to be able to use it and surprise my family.  I'm not sure what we'll do after #2.  No matter the gender, I'd like to have more....but it will depend on how things are going after #2 is here and if DH decides he wants more children or not.

MrsWhiteonWhiteSt

Not sure. DH always swore he wanted 1 LO and I wanted 4. Now we're talking about ttc #2 this fall and he just randomly said, " if it was another boy, I'd be tempted to try for a girl". I always thought I would be the one dying to have a girl. The clothes, the mother-daughter bond... but after having my heart stolen by such a little mama's boy I honestly, 100% don't care the sexes of our next 1 or 2 kids

JenJar

Wanted to add a funny story....

We went out to dinner with friends that have 3 kids, so there were 4 kids total.  The owner was walking around, asking about our meals, etc. and he stopped to ask about the kids.  We explained that G was ours, the other 3 were theirs. (2 girls and 1 boy)  He looked at them and said, "Don't keep having kids trying to even them out....that's what we did and I ended up with 7 kids!"  We all laughed and thought it was funny.  (Little did we know that they were actually pregnant at the time, but it was another a little girl!)

NikCole

we will be done at 2 no matter what the sex. I'm not gonna lie, I would like a little girl, but 2 healthy boys would be a blessing. I hate when people say things like "you have one of each, the perfect family" Like having 2 boys or 2 girls isn't good enough!

Before getting pregnant and having E, I always thought I would want girls more... like I'd have more of a bond w/ them or something. But now that I'm a mom, all I care about is a healthy baby.

SeptemberBride'08

We don't have any but I would really love to have at least 3 maybe 4 and have boys and girls. Not sure if I would keep going past those numbers to have a certain sex.

BethPSU

We have always planned on having 3, but I do think that deep down I always thought I would have both genders.  My DH is convinced that we are going to have a house full of boys! Honestly, I would love that because the guys I knew that grew up with brothers are usually so close.  I think there is definitely a greater bond between sisters and brothers than brother/sister combo.  I will be so happy if this baby is a boy so that DS has a brother close in age and selfishly for me I think a girl would be amazing too since I always want that mother-daughter relationship. We haven't decided if we will adopt #3 or have #3 biologically.  Sometimes I try to talk DH into having 3 and adopting #4.  We'll see.....

Read2Me

We are just having Eva so this doesn't apply to me but I thoughtI'd share my SIL's story.  She wanted a girl..bad.  She ended up having five boys before her husband cut her off.  So she adopted a girl.

battybtags

We'll be done with 2 no matter what. Although had we had 2 boys I'm not sure what would have happened. DH knew I really wanted a girl so I think he was relieved that we had one! Sort of took the pressure off of #2 being one! I think I would have wanted to try for a 3rd, but I'm not sure if he would have. He's totally happy if we have 2 girls as well.

TinaL99

I have always really wanted a boy.  And I know that DH wants a boy to carry on the family name.  We both want 2 kids so I guess we just have to wait and see what we get!  Happy, healthy babies are the #1 priority and I'm pretty sure we would be set with 2 kids, no matter what the gender is.  I don't think having 2 girls would convince me to try for a 3rd....but DH might try!