If you're finished having kids...

eclaires

did you feel done while pregnant?

Not in a "OMG I'm exhausted and never doing this again," way, but in a "my family is complete" way.

It's odd, b/c I always thought I would want more than 2 kids, but I just feel like once this baby is here, our family will be complete.  I've been feeling like that a lot.

We're not making any permanent decisions any time soon (we're both 28), but I just didn't expect it and wondered if others felt the same way?

EMT

I felt that way too while PG but now I want one more.

cooker71

Felt that way then, still feel that way now!

*Amy*

I am not done, but I definitley didn't feel that way last time.  We had always talked about 3 kids so maybe that is why.  I hope I feel it the next time though b/c that will definitely be it!

sooosie

I didn't because I always thought I wanted 3.  Until I had 2. 

Temp374386125003286

cooker71:

Felt that way then, still feel that way now!

Exactly this.  I couldn't be paid to have more, I am done.

Mominator

I'm only done because of my circumstance. I have known for a long time that I wanted 4 kids, so truthfully, I still don't feel like my family is complete. Kind of sucks actually.

mlm1128

Maybe it's because I was older when I had dd, but I felt like that was it as soon as I has my big ultrasound and knew she was OK.

DandelionMom

I felt that way while pregnant (and while we had a newborn) but changed my mind when my baby was about 2.  Even now that we're really done, I catch myself second guessing the decision. 

lizlemon77

I told my doctor at one of my first prenatal appointments that I wanted my tubes tied during the c-section.  I felt a little bad like it made it seem like we didn't want the baby that was on the way, but that totally wasn't true.  We just both felt like two was perfect for us.

YouAreMyILoveYou

Nope, but I think it is because I would like to have another but won't. We knew going into the second pregnancy that it would be our last. I felt that I was 100% done and when I found out we were having another girl I started down the "what if we have one more..." because I know DH would LOVE to have a son.

Financially it would be a terrible move. And I don't think I can emotionally handle 3 kids. But, I think I will always feel like I want to be pregnant again. Not a terrible yearning to have a child like I had when TTC #2, but just a thought about having another.

BubblyToes

If my next one is a girl, I can confidently say that I am done. 

mlm1128

I guess I hit enter too fast!  I spent the first 18 weeks of my pregnancy having internal panic attacks.  I was complete terrified that something was going to go wrong, and I don't mean like a disability.  DD was not a big baby, and I think that as a result I never really felt her move alot. Once I knew she was actually moving on there I relaxed.

Also, I will admit that if she had been a boy I would have had another.  We are an all boy family with the exception of dd. I would have felt almost obligated. 

eclaires

Hmm, thanks, ladies!

I guess it's just odd to me b/c I did not expect to feel this way AT ALL.  I've always wanted to have 3-4 kids, and it's not the exhaustion or m/s making me feel this way.  I just feel totally at peace with this being my last pregnancy.  It's bizarre to me since I thought I wanted more kids.

And I really feel like it's odd since I have no idea what we're having - I thought I would really want a girl, but even if we have 2 boys, I feel really happy about that.

It's all very peaceful and zen for me, which is so.not.me, which is probably why it's making me wonder.  LOL.

JillShari

I always thought I'd have two.   I felt done when I was pregnant the entire time basically using every single thing as another reason why I don't want to be pregnant again.  Even when I knew it was another boy...I have no thoughts on "trying" for a girl, although the world seems to think we should, but we aren't listening to those people.  And after dealing with all the stresses of two and sibling jealousy stuff, I don't want to do it again....so, I'm terrified of having an oopsy....so much that we are looking into getting DH snipped.

Mrs.LB705

Sigh.  It's no secret that Dave went and got snipped when B was only 5 months old.  We had always said we'd have two, and I had a GREAT pregnancy, etc. etc. etc., but those first few weeks were SO HARD, and I was SO sleep deprived, etc. and nobody told me that it was normal and would ge better . . . so Dave (who had been on the fence about two anyway because I'm a twin and we DON'T want three!) asked me whether he should just go and get snipped.  I signed the consent and it was done.

It wasn't until maybe six months ago that I started to think we'd acted too hastily.  I mean, financially and for all practical reasons, we made the right choice . . . but emotionally?  I'm just not sure I feel done.

Brewster

I don't think I can really answer b/c I always only wanted 2.  I think if I didn't have to do the whole newborn/infant thing again I could be persuaded to have a 3rd.

springmom

Mominator:

I'm only done because of my circumstance. I have known for a long time that I wanted 4 kids, so truthfully, I still don't feel like my family is complete. Kind of sucks actually.

This. 

wellfleet04

When I was pregnant I was SURE I was done.  We always talked about two kids.  We have a boy and a girl.  I'm 34, so no spring chicken.  I felt the same way during Ben's newborn period.  But when he was about 3 months old, I started to feel an overwhelming sadness that he was my last baby.  I did not enjoy Kate's babyhood at all.  I was so stressed out.  I have been a much more relaxed, confident mother this time around.  I'd love another baby.  LOVE.  And we ALWAYS said we'd have 2.  I cannot believe I feel that way.  DH however is 100% certain he doesn't want any more.  So....we are done, but I feel sad about it.

PoundCake

I felt done while being pregnant.  Totally done.  Then about 4-5 months after my second I really wanted a 3rd.  I had a tubal so I knew its wasn't possible.  Plus the circumstances were I could only have 2 anyway.

But just yesterday I was watching the two of them together and it felt totally complete.  I'm so ok with the 2 of them.  Three wouldn't be right for me.

KellyGreen

I feel the opposite.  I always felt like 2 was the perfect number but now that I am pregnant with #2 I am sad thinking this may be my last pregnancy   We'll see!

Mrs.Tony

I thought I would feel complete with our family of two babies but I am having thoughts alot about a 3rd. It won't happen as MH is dead set against. I will be 37 this year, we have had trouble so would have to have IVF if we wanted another, and just a whole host of other reasons!  I am really feeling like I will miss having a baby.  (part of this is probably due to the fact that my baby is turning one this week!)

marigolds

Yes, I felt done while pregnant.  I knew that I would only have one *big* u/s, feel the baby kick for the first time only once, give birth once...  I knew that I only want one child and that has never changed.  As soon as dd outgrew her clothes and baby things (swing, bathtub, changing table) I passed them on.  My dd is about to turn 4 and I'm about to turn 35 and I haven't had a change of heart.

winery

Doesn't everyone feel that way while pregnant?  j/k

I really felt that way when I brought little B home.  I remember it so clearly, and considering I was all doped up, that's something.  But we put him down in the foyer and the sun was shining in and I took a few steps back to soak it all in.  And Jonathan walked right up to him, Benjamin let out a wail and Jonathan smacked him in the head because "he was cryin'" and I knew then that our family was totally complete. 

I laughed the whole time (probably the drugs) but everyone else was so concerned.  Meh, infants have hard heads. 

shopgirl78

I did while I was pregnant with Jacob and still feel that way for the most part, except now I am a bit sad I will never get a BFP, have a baby/newborn again...

I have until 2/26 to decided about my tubal 

Bellisimo

No, it was once the 2nd got here and I had myass handed to me on a daily basis that pretty much sealed the deal.  My second pregnancy DID suck though.  So that didn't help.

Angela814

I don't know what our plans are yet, but I don't feel done yet. I'm planning on at least one more. I just need to get DH on board.

mamarazzi

I felt that way when I was pregnant.  And even probably until DS2 was 9-10 months old.  I just felt at peace with our family and couldn't imagine it getting any better by adding another child.  Buuuuuut, now we're definitely considering #3 seriously again.  We always said 3 and would consider foster care and/or adoption after that.

I'm convinced we'll have another boy and am excited about having a whole brood of dudes in my house, so it's not about trying for a girl (though I'd love to have a daughter).  I just don't feel done yet.

ilovemygirls

smccabe9:

cooker71:

Felt that way then, still feel that way now!

Exactly this.  I couldn't be paid to have more, I am done.

Amen!

kertybird

I always thought we would have more, but after a very good friend of mine almost lost her baby in November due to pre-term labor I realized that I just don't want to go through that again.  My pregnancies are always really tough and I don't want to put my family through it again.  But we will see.

goodheartedmommy

I felt done in the "I'm never going through another pregnancy again." It took about 6 months after having Maile to really feel complete, like I was okay not having another child. It's weird, though, because I really felt done after Bella.

shouldbworkin

I didn't feel done when I had #2, but I could not contemplate #3.  I couldn't even consider it until #2 was 2 y/o. 

AnneUCSB

I thought I'd feel done with this, my third baby on the way, but I really don't.  Honestly, though, since we are expecting another boy, it is hard for me to accept that we are done and I may never have a daughter.  DH and I always wanted three kids but I assumed there'd be a girl in that mix somewhere.  Now I am trying to convince him to have a fourth, but likely via adoption (to choose a girl) to complete our family.

kjr

When I was pregnant with my first two I felt like I definitely wanted more.  After I had our second son, I knew our family wasn't complete and I wanted one or two more.  Now that we are expecting number 3 I just really feel like this will complete us.

soontobeahigh

I did feel this way pregnant but it was b/c I was just worn out. Now I am sure I am done, my family feels complete.