My IL vent

goodheartedmommy

FIL called today and wanted E&B to go out to dinner with them and their friends, then spend the night at their house. Okay, fine. I had to install seats when we got there. I told Bella we needed to run upstairs to weigh her--her seat in their car RF to 33 lbs, and I know she's close. FIL said "she's 3, I thought we would go ahead and turn her now." I said "well, she's never once asked to face forward, so as long as she's happy and within the limits, we'll leave her like that." He scoffed and said "Come on, Erin. You're being completely ridiculous."

Instead of getting into it, I just told him that I was the parent, and that it's a fact that rear facing is 500% safer than forward, and I have no reason to turn her yet. 

And honestly, I'm really not opposed to her being FF at this point. But really, it's not his business--he has to buckle her in either way, and it's really no harder. If I had an extra $250 laying around, I'd get a radian XT that RF to 45 lbs for his car, just because I'm feeling bratty tonight. She weighed 32.2 lbs fully clothed today, so I really need to turn her in there, but don't want to now that he acted like that!

goodheartedmommy

And this is not a RF vs FF debate starter--it's just me being mad about how he treated me over it.

jessicaclare

Questioning me on anything I do that is for the safety of my children is basically an invitation to throw down. I don't handle it well. I don't blame you for being pissed.

littlemermaid

I'd be happy that he at least uses a car seat, whether it's FF or RF.  I know some people's parent's who say, "you didn't have a car seat when you were little and you turned out fine."  So at least be happy he's not one of those.

goodheartedmommy

He doesn't get to choose whether or not to use a carseat! I don't get the "oh, well at least they're in one" argument. THAT is completely ridiculous--and comparable to our generations "I didn't ride in one and I was fine". Forward is still less safe, and it's still MY child we're talking about.

littlemermaid

goodheartedmommy:

He doesn't get to choose whether or not to use a carseat! I don't get the "oh, well at least they're in one" argument. THAT is completely ridiculous--and comparable to our generations "I didn't ride in one and I was fine". Forward is still less safe, and it's still MY child we're talking about.

My point was be happy that he is using a car seat.  It didn't sound like he was questioning your parenting skills.  I really think you have blown this totally out of the water.  Chill woman!!  Don't take it so personally, he didn't sound like he was criticizing you at all, just making a comment.  So much for people being able to have a conversation.

Marce921

jessicaclare:

Questioning me on anything I do that is for the safety of my children is basically an invitation to throw down. I don't handle it well. I don't blame you for being pissed.

Ditto this. My mom gave me crap for keeping DS RFing until 2, but he honestly was BARELY 20 lbs at that point.

goodheartedmommy

And my point is that no, I will not just be happy he's using a carseat. It's not enough--not in my book enough.

littlemermaid

goodheartedmommy:

And my point is that no, I will not just be happy he's using a carseat. It's not enough--not in my book enough.

You still don't get it.  It does not sound like he was criticizing your parenting skills.  It just sounds like he was commenting on his age and you keeping him RF.  It sounds like he was just making conversation.  You are taking his comment too seriously.  It's not like he undermined you by putting him FF when you wanted him RF.