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Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
megontoast
member
SAHMs.. some questions.
megontoast
member
My questions are assuming that your DH/SO works full time out of the house.
1) When your husband leaves in the morning, does LO cry for them?
2) When your husband gets home from work, are they excited to see him?
3) If you had to/wanted to leave for a few hours on the weekend and leave LO with DH, does your LO cry for you? Is it more intense when you leave than when your DH leaves?
What I'm getting at is this.. do you think LO is more attached to you since you are home with them all day?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: SAHMs.. some questions.
First DH works from home but he is in his office all day.
DS actually used to be more attached to DH but he is getting more attached to me for some reason, not sure why. I think it just goes back and forth, naturally :-)
He rarely cries when either of us leave, lol. He's been pretty independent so far. Sometimes it annoys me when we drop him off at MIL's house for date night.. It's like, he could get a *little* attached but it seem he could really care less.
But I should say that if he hasn't spent a lot of time with one of us one day and that person comes and says hi then has to run out the door, there's been a time or two he wold get upset but he's usually also tired or hungry or something as well.
ETA: To answer is he happy when he see's DH. Yes. Way more happy than when he see's me. Like other poster said, if I've been gone all day then he gets excited but otherwise he's much more happy to see daddy than mommy.
I don't think he's more or less attatched to me, I just think it is a different attatchment.
He's asleep when Stephen leaves for work, so that's not a big deal. But as soon as he hears the garage door go up in the evening, he drops everything and runs to the door.
He doesn't cry when I leave, and he doesn't seem overly impressed when I come home, unless I've been gone all day.
1. M is still sleeping when dh leaves for work.
2. M runs around squealing with such delight that her favorite toy is home.
3. M does cry when I leave.
M is definitely more attached to me. She always has been. Even when dh worked less hours & she saw him more.
Mama Jan's Kitchen... a food blog
1. no
2. yes
3. Sometimes she cries when I leave, but only right when I exit the room. She never stays upset just because I'm not there.
Yes, I think she's more attached to me b/c she's with me more, but only slightly. She adores her dad.
1) When your husband leaves in the morning, does LO cry for them?
He has started to this past month. It's heartbreaking.
2) When your husband gets home from work, are they excited to see him?
Very much so. He hears his car and he and the dog meet him at the door.
3) If you had to/wanted to leave for a few hours on the weekend and leave LO with DH, does your LO cry for you? NOPE.
Is it more intense when you leave than when your DH leaves? Neither.
What I'm getting at is this.. do you think LO is more attached to you since you are home with them all day? Not at all. Actually, since Christmas break he has totally turned into Daddy's boy. I was a little jealous, but now I'm very much happy about it, because LO is coming in August, and I'm happy that DH and DS are going to be best buddies. They will need to be, as I will be spending time with LO.
1. No. She walks him to the door, gives him kisses, helps him put his shoes on, more kisses, closes the door behind him, waves and blows more kisses to him from the window by the door.
2. Oh yes.
3. Nope.
I think I'm more her constant, taken-for-granted, day-to-day caregiver. She's attached to me in much the same manner she is attached to her right arm. She knows I'm always there, and it would be extremely difficult for her to function without me, but I'm not exactly exciting. Dada is her big, overgrown, exciting playmate. If she's upset and we're both home, she wants me for comfort, definitely.
1) When your husband leaves in the morning, does LO cry for them? No
2) When your husband gets home from work, are they excited to see him? Yes
3) If you had to/wanted to leave for a few hours on the weekend and leave LO with DH, does your LO cry for you? Is it more intense when you leave than when your DH leaves? Sometime, but he only cries for a short amount of time. As long as he gets to wave goodbye out the window to me, he's pretty content.
I do believe he's more attached to me as I'm with him majority of the time.
1. Depends on the day, but usually no. But we go to the door to say good-bye, give kisses, and then we go to the picture window to wave bye-bye. So he knows what's going on.
2. Freaking-a yes! DH usually calls when he's almost home, and then I tell D to go to the window to watch for him. As soon as Daddy pulls in, D is pointing and waving.
3. Nope, D doesn't cry for me. But he LOVES his daddy!
Bottom line, he is not more attached to me even though I am here with him more.
1) When your husband leaves in the morning, does LO cry for them? No
2) When your husband gets home from work, are they excited to see him? Very!
3) If you had to/wanted to leave for a few hours on the weekend and leave LO with DH, does your LO cry for you? Is it more intense when you leave than when your DH leaves? No
1. No
2. Yes. When DH gets home, DS's entire face lights up and all he wants to do for the rest of the night is hang out with dad. It's really cute to see how excited he gets.
3. No to both. DS is pretty attached to both of us. As long as one of us is around, he's fine, but if he doesn't see either of us, then he cries.
I work FT and DH is a SAHD. Lately, Samantha has become sooo attached to her daddy. When I leave, she couldn't care less. When I come home, she smiles and that's about it. But, if DH even so much as leaves the room, she goes running after him and will stand at the door and cry until he comes back. Usually, I can distract her with a toy or some goldfish. LOL
It's heartbreaking, but I'm sure it's just a phase. I was just curious if this is normal when there is one working parent. Thanks ladies!
A lot of times DD and I are still sleeping when he leaves.
She does wander around saying Da Da? A bit after we wake up. I call him and let her talk to him so she can hear his voice.
She is super happy to see him when he gets home.
She watches me from the window when I leave and wanders back to him. She is pretty good about either of us leaving. If the boys are here she is even less upset about it because she hangs on their every word and move.
1) When your husband leaves in the morning, does LO cry for them?--DD is still sleeping when DH leaves for work
2) When your husband gets home from work, are they excited to see him?--Yes, she runs and greats him at the door.
3) If you had to/wanted to leave for a few hours on the weekend and leave LO with DH, does your LO cry for you? Is it more intense when you leave than when your DH leaves?--She usually cries for me, but DH just tells her that I'll be back soon and tries to distract her with something.
What I'm getting at is this.. do you think LO is more attached to you since you are home with them all day?--DH has HIS things that he does with her that I think help. They go to a class together on Saturdays, he does the bedtime routine (bath, jammies, etc) and I think that all helps. If she is upset/scared/nervous, she generally wants me.
DS~4 years old~born November 6, 2010 (1st year of preschool)
My Easy Cooking Blog
1. No, he's usually out the door before the kids wake up.
2. Always.
3. They don't usually cry when I leave. Sometimes, but not usually.
- It's just different. They don't love me more, but I'm mom. I think it's the same for working mothers. What did I read in a book once...it was something like, "to children there is but one god, and her name is Mommy. Daddy is just one of her prophets." I'm sure that's not true for everyone, but in our house most of their needs are met by me. It wouldn't be any different if I worked.
1) DD has never really minded when DH leaves in the morning. Now, it is a fun ritual. She opens the garage door, which she thinks is the greatest job in the world. Then we go upstairs and wave to daddy from her window.
2) Very excited. Often we pick him up at work, and she actually shrieks when she sees him crossing the parking lot.
3) I go out at least once a week without DD. It depends on where she's at, developmentally. Now, she's indifferent; three weeks ago, she was crying each time.
Definitely, she's more attached to me than DH. Not sure how much that has to do with the extra hours I spend with her. It could have been breastfeeding, or instinct.
1) When your husband leaves in the morning, does LO cry for them? no. they are still asleep. he leaves at like 8 and then wake up at like 830. *if* they do see him in the morning, they wave goodbye. aidan understands "daddy goes to work".
2) When your husband gets home from work, are they excited to see him? omg yes. i should record it. everyone runs to the front, sawyer attaches to his legs....
3) If you had to/wanted to leave for a few hours on the weekend and leave LO with DH, does your LO cry for you? Is it more intense when you leave than when your DH leaves? nope. not at all. they are more excited to spend time with dh alone.
oh and this.
they see me all day - by the evening, i am useless. lol
if dh leaves town, they are "over" me by day 3. like completely.
if i leave the house, no one notices at all i dont think.
1) Some mornings he might fuss for him for a few minutes but he basically knows the routine. He waves and says bye bye from the window and he leaves and goes back to his playing as soon as DH s gone.
2) Yes, very excited!!! It's all about Daddy once DH gets home. He could no longer care if I am around.
3) If I leave and DH is here, he doesn't really care. He says "Bye Bye" and watches me leave from the window but there is absolutey no crying. He's a complete Daddy's boy.
1) When your husband leaves in the morning, does LO cry for them? yes
2) When your husband gets home from work, are they excited to see him? yes
3) If you had to/wanted to leave for a few hours on the weekend and leave LO with DH, does your LO cry for you? Is it more intense when you leave than when your DH leaves? Yes he cries. I would say it is about the same intensity but it lasts longer becuase I am better than DH at the distraction method.
What I'm getting at is this.. do you think LO is more attached to you since you are home with them all day?
1) When your husband leaves in the morning, does LO cry for them? No, she's usually still asleep. Even if she was awake she wouldn't though.
2) When your husband gets home from work, are they excited to see him? Most definitely.
3) If you had to/wanted to leave for a few hours on the weekend and leave LO with DH, does your LO cry for you? Is it more intense when you leave than when your DH leaves? No, she doesn't even notice I'm gone. If DH is there, she doesn't care.
1. She's used to the routine of daddy going to work in the mornings, so she doesn't cry, but she LOVES the weekends because he's home all day.
2. She's very excited to see him when he gets home--she does a little dance.
3. She's fine if I leave her with him for a few hours.
She's going through an intense mommy-preference phase right now, but she's gone through daddy phases, too.
1) When your husband leaves in the morning, does LO cry for them? NO
2) When your husband gets home from work, are they excited to see him? YES
3) If you had to/wanted to leave for a few hours on the weekend and leave LO with DH, does your LO cry for you? Is it more intense when you leave than when your DH leaves? NO
What I'm getting at is this.. do you think LO is more attached to you since you are home with them all day? Yes and no. DH works from 7am-5pm, Mon-Fri & from 6pm-2am, Sat & Sun. Our older DD was definitely more attached to me when she was younger. DD#2 is a daddy's girl, though. DS#2 really shows no preference for either of us. He is 100% content with whomever has him.
1) When your husband leaves in the morning, does LO cry for them?
No, but if I left in the morning or they left together (sometimes he'll take him to work or he takes him to swim lessons), he wouldn't cry for me either.
2) When your husband gets home from work, are they excited to see him?
Very much so.
3) If you had to/wanted to leave for a few hours on the weekend and leave LO with DH, does your LO cry for you? Is it more intense when you leave than when your DH leaves?
No. Doesn't cry.
What I'm getting at is this.. do you think LO is more attached to you since you are home with them all day?
No...I don't know. He's very easygoing and I've always made it a habit to leave him with different people for a few hours at least once a week, sometimes more, so he's used to being with different people and definitely his father. I drop my son off at our store (where mh is) to do errands also like once a week.
1) When your husband leaves in the morning, does LO cry for them? No but he's usually asleep with me in bed at the time.
2) When your husband gets home from work, are they excited to see him? SUPER excited. It's more equal now but there was about a month where DS wanted NOTHING to do with me when DH was home.
3) If you had to/wanted to leave for a few hours on the weekend and leave LO with DH, does your LO cry for you? No Is it more intense when you leave than when your DH leaves? No problems with either. DH has said that after several hours DS whines for me.
What I'm getting at is this.. do you think LO is more attached to you since you are home with them all day? I think he is a little more attached to me and my way of doing things but he ABSOLUTELY loves his daddy.
DS 09/2008
1) DD usually gets up early enough to see DH before he leaves, and we've explained to her that "Dadda needs to go to work." For her, this means Dadda goes in the car. She'll often say "Dadda, car" in the mornings, so she knows he's going/gone but doesn't cry or get upset.
2) Yes, she gets excited to see him. Some days more than others, if she happens to be distracted with a toy or something at the moment. I usually ask her, "Guess who's home?" and she always says, "Dadda!" and will often run to the door to wait for him to come inside.
3) She'd kind of in a Mama-stage right now, but she loves her Dadda and has a great time with him, even if she still asks about me. Sometimes it takes a bit of distracting on his part.
I do think she's very attached to me. But at the same time, this weekend she was upset about something, I went to comfort her, and she started crying for Dadda and only wanted him to hold her. So she's just as connected to him, I think.
DD1, 1/5/2008 ~~~ DD2, 3/17/2010
1. Yes, although it's getting better. He used to have complete breakdowns every single morning.
2. Yes, runs to the door
3. Not usually
If anything I think he's more daddy-attached, but I think it has a lot to do with missing him because he's at work all day.