I'm sure I'll get flamed for this, but I think we need to...

CubbyMama

...find a new home for our dog.

I just don't have any time or energy for her.  She showed up on our doorstep, literally, when I was pg with E, and we looked for the owners but ended up just keeping her b/c no one claimed her.  We've had her for over a year now, and at first it seemed like we could manage, but it's just not happening--she almost never gets walked, and I'm lucky (well, I guess SHE is lucky) if I get a chance to play with her once a day for a few minutes.  The rest of the time, she's getting into stuff, hanging out alone in the back yard, or is under my feet constantly until I want to scream.

Now that E is crawling & cruising, everything feels more hectic than ever--I feel like Taz, literally almost running from one thing to the next, all day long.  Between keeping both girls and the dog out of mischief, patrolling the floors so E or the pup won't eat stuff, trying to make a dent in the laundry & housework that's piling up, and all the other things going on, I just feel like I don't have an ounce of anything left for this dog, and it's not fair to her.  You know it's bad when I hardly even have time to post on the Nest anymore! *horror*

I've thought about paying someone to come and walk her, but a) we don't have a ton of extra money right now, and b) I don't even think a walk every day would compensate for getting such minimal attention the rest of the time.  No one we know wants a dog, though, and I hate to just give her away to a random person so K never sees her again--I know that would upset her--so I don't really know what to do.  I guess I'm just venting, though I'll take any brilliant advice anyone might have!

DandelionMom

I'm not going to flame but I really hope you find a way to work on things with her. 

You wouldn't have to pay a kid much to walk her.  Surely there's a junior high or highschooler near you that loves dogs? 

And remember this phase with the kids doesn't last that long. 

ETA: if you do decide to rehome her, make sure you go through a reputable rescue or shelter.  They have the resources to make sure she's going to a good home.  It will be hard to find one though, with the economy most are full. 

mlm1128

I just got done screaming at both of my dogs for trying to get my dinner.  I know they can be frustrating!  But I love them...they're part of the family.

Is it a big dog or little dog?  I'm sure dande is right.  A kid would walk her cheap.  I don't have a lot of time to walk the dogs in the winter, but once it gets nice dd loves to take them for walks.  And the dog whisperer says  to put them on a treadmill if you need to.

penguingrrl

I'm so sorry.  That must be so difficult.  I agree that if you can't give her the energy and attention she needs and deserves it's better to send her to someone who can.

lappy9

I understand what you are saying. We have a large dog and he doesn't get enough exercise but we do our best to walk him once a day.  Some days it doesn't happen and i feel bad but i could never get rid of him, he is happy here.

 Once it gets warmer it will be easier to play outside more with her, or walk her.  I can now walk the dog and the two kids b/c my oldest can do walks not in a stroller. 

I agree with pp, def look into a dog walker!

knmommy

I could have written this post when Allison was a baby, and I think I actually did.  She was a baby, I had Kaitlyn (less than 2yrs apart) We had a dog, and I just was diagnosed with MS. 

We stuck with our dog and now it is so much better.  You have to do what is right for you and your family, but it does get better and easier.  Good luck.

Zenya

Where is she all day when you're at work?

marchbaby

Doggy daycare...best thing ever!  ha

Seriously, I never thought i'd pay to bring my dog to daycare but when my first son was born we had a hyper 200 pound mastiff.  We brought him two mornings a week and those days were great!  He got to play all morning and I got a break, and then he slept all afternoon b/c he was so tired from all that playing!  Of course there is the financial aspect of that as well, but it wasn't too bad. 

Or maybe see if you could find a kid to walk/play with him?  

 I understand the frustration, and its a tough time of year.  My boys and dog are getting restless from spending so much time inside, I can't wait until spring when we can all get outside together!  Of course, then i'll have muddy kids and dog!  ha

But if you really don't think you can do it then certainly try to find him a home.  But it will be hard, shelters are packed.  The economy has taken a toll on pets

 

CubbyMama

Zenya:

Where is she all day when you're at work?

DH and I work opposite days, so one of us is home with the girls almost all the time.  They go to my grandma's on Mondays when our shifts overlap for 5 hours, and the dog goes with them.  (She likes having the dog visit but doesn't want to keep her!)

Zenya

It's good that someone's mostly there then!

IDK how to share my thoughts without sounding like I'm flaming you.  But I think this is just one of those thing you do.  Like you change diapers and do dishes and walk the dog, KWIM?  Did you grow up with a dog?

JOEBunny

I have no opinion either way on whether or not you choose to get rid of her, but I will say, that there is nothing wrong with having a dog who stays outside most of the day.  Until the latest, dogs as a substitute for people, dogs where just fine being outside.  Our dog growing up was often outside.   One of my friends had a dog that attacked her cat when she had a newborn and it had to spend the rest of its life (3 years) outside because she was terrified to have it in the house with her daughter (it had bitten a few people previously, once unprovoked).  She died at 15 years old.  It is not the end of the world.  It will get easier in a year or two and you can focus a bit more attention on the dog.

 I don't have a dog, don't want one, and used to like them until I moved to a neighborhood where all the single people have them as substitute children (which results in horrible dog behavior 1/2 the time.)

am073104

aww. No flames from me...we have this issue times three   But, I've never wanted to get rid of them.  They are part of the family.  DD has never known a time without them, and until they pass on, they're going to stay.

Yes, THREE dogs, and I rarely get them out for walks in these Nebraska winters since DH works long hours.  However, since there are three of them, they love to play chase outside, and I throw tennis balls from the patio door out to them to fetch when the kids are napping.  The kids love on them all the time (yes, even the 14 month old likes to pet them!) and in general, if I'm not doing housework or playing with the kids, I'm petting a dog.  It is therapeutic, in a way, especially if I'm having a stressful day, to just sit and pet one of my furry buddies.

(I love them all, but a big fat BOO! to the people who suggested we get dogs before we had kids.  Things would definitely be a lot easier, not to mention that the dogs' medical bills and special food nearly put us into debt every month  )

CubbyMama

Zenya:

It's good that someone's mostly there then!

IDK how to share my thoughts without sounding like I'm flaming you.  But I think this is just one of those thing you do.  Like you change diapers and do dishes and walk the dog, KWIM?  Did you grow up with a dog?

No, that's fair, and you're right.  I guess the difference is that I love my kids and the time I spend with/on them is rewarding and fun...and I've mostly come to think of the dog as a nuisance.  I don't say that proudly, but I'm just being honest.  It's completely our fault: we decided to keep her but haven't had the time to get her into training to make her a less-annoying dog, and so the more she bugs me, the less I want to do anything with her....and the less attention she gets, the more needy and annoying she becomes.  It's a vicious cycle!

I grew up with outside dogs--they were never in the house and mostly just stayed outside on their own, except for when we happened to be playing in the back yard or when my dad went out for 30 minutes or so to play with them.  We have coyotes and rattlesnakes near where we live, so I knew if we kept Catey-Pup she'd need to be an indoor dog except for when we're home and can keep an eye on her outside.

PMQ, thanks for that story!  I'm not sure whether we'd actually go through with "getting rid" of her, but if we did, something like that would be ideal.  I do care about her and would only want to give her to someone who would make her happier than we do!

Zenya

I totally get how the whole 'outside dog' thing could make it difficult for you to relate to a.. regular dog.  I know all dogs are dogs but you KWIM.

I grew up with an inside dog so that's all I know.  We don't have a dog now b/c I'm afraid I'll get one with chronic health issues and I won't be able to pay for their care.

If you're not 'feeling it' then best to rehome her, IMHO