Does this sound strange?

PSU-NCBride

I am exhausted and very disappointed this morning. I stayed up as late as I could but finally went to bed with having received no call. Our caseworker promised she would call no matter how late. 

At 12:30 the phone rang and my hubby grabbed it. I was half asleep during the call so I could barely comprehend what she was saying net alone form and ask all my questions. I'm going to call back today to follow up.

So she said that the appointment went great. Baby looks healthy and the doctor is no longer concerned about the medical risk we have been tracking. I won't get into that but there have been complications with this pregnancy that have concerned us all. I've been getting some help from H's pediatrician but plan to call my OB today to get some more information on questions to ask. Like, what tests did they run that make them indicate the risk is gone now?

Then the caseworker says that the doctor said she wasn't even going to do an ultrasound because she knew she wouldn't be able to tell the sex. Why? The caseworker didn't know. She's 20 weeks today. Does that not seem strange? Why would the doctor know that without looking. Position? I'm going to ask my OB too because I feel like I need to ask questions about that. My caseworker said that we could have told the doctor to do the fetal photographs but there is no guarantee that it will show? What are those? 

While I'm bummed we don't know the sex I'm more concerned with what would be causing them to (1) not look or (2) not be able to tell.

I know nothing about pregnancy or what is normal. We missed all this with H. Am I worrying about nothing or can anyone help with questions I need to be asking of the caseworker or of my own personal OB?

PS - The agency is supposed to be emailing me the medical reports so that I can be showing those to my OB but I haven't gotten those yet.  

 

chocolatechip06

I'm a lurker here, but the only reason I can think that they would not be able to tell the gender at this point, is the position of the baby (ie. not able to get the anatomy shot).  But normally they do the ultrasound and tell you that they cannot clearly determine the gender once they have tried a couple of different views etc.

So the reasoning definitely does sound strange.

Good luck in getting answers.

PSU-NCBride

Thanks, Fred. Yeah, the gender thing really doesn't matter. I'm more concerned about the fact that this throws up some red flags as far as what the heck is going on at the doctors office! Her caseworker was apparently asleep when ours called to get the update so I'm hoping information was just lost in translation. 

Cissi64

Fred is right.  There is so much more that they look for at the big US.  They check growth to make sure the baby isn't too big/too small.  They check to make sure the brain is developing and that all four chambers of the heart are present and functioning, blood flow is going in and out correctly.  They look at kidneys and the amount of amniotic fluid.  I had to have more than one because during my one and only successful pregnancy, my DD  was stubborn and they couldn't get a good shot of her heart.  I was also considered high risk because of my age.  I'm sure your OB can tell you more and I"m sure I'm not remembering everything.

I would definitely push for more answers though.  You need to know everything they can possibly tell you so that you can be prepared for the situation in case  there is an issue.

PSU-NCBride

Thanks all. I have a call in to my doctor. I'm going to ask her this but how often do they normally do the ultrasounds? She just had one two weeks ago and goes back to the doctor every week or every other week from what I can tell so far. 

lrrb

I didn't read what pp said but I will add that maybe they have very old equipment at her OB (if its state run or something) and they just can't tell.  I know that our BM didn't know the sex of her baby until about 30 weeks bc her pre natal care until she came to FL (from Alabama) was at an office with VERY old equipment. 

PSU-NCBride

I have not been to her OB's office, but she is in Utah with the agency. She's working with the same doctors she did for H. The hospital, at least, that H was born at was extremely nice and state of the art. I was really impressed with all the medical staff we interacted with. You never know though. 

cymru

Lurking here, but I just want to say at the hospital I work at, any patients that come from the free prenatal clinic are given their 20 week ultrasound for medical reasons and are NOT told the sex of the baby under any circumstances. I work in lab, not ultrasound so I don't know the reasoning why, I just know it is posted in all the ultrasound rooms.

~Kennedy

CaptainSerious

Did your SW talk to the doctor or to your birthmom?  Is it possible that the birthmom doesn't want to know the sex, so she's just telling you they won't do the ultrasound?

erinms

Another idea- we had our ultrasound at a different office from our usual OB visits.  At the OB office I had ultrasounds to check for the heartbeat, date the pregnancy and at the end of the pregnancy to make sure his head was down.  Their machines were not anywhere near as good as the ultrasound specialist office.  The 20 week ultrasound took an hour at least, and that is when we found out the sex.  But Fred is right, they do a billion other measurements at that ultrasound.

Is it possible that the visit yesterday was just a routine office visit and the anatomy ultrasound is scheduled for another day somewhere else?

WinWed

I hope you get some answers!