Is it just me?

agdudley08

I can't stop thinking about how this child is going to get out!  I can't wait to meet our little girl, but I'd be ok if she just stayed in there forever, rather than having to deliver her. 

I am TERRIFIED of both vaginal or c-section deliveries.  Labor scares the crap out of me because of how much discomfort/pain I will have to endure for who knows how long.  A c-section scares me because of many reasons, mainly being awake while they cut me open & then having to recover with a newborn. 

True story. When we got out BFP, I started to cry, kissed DH & then said "how is it going to get out?!?!"

amandalea51107

I'm scared too!!! I don't want to be and I know millions of woman have got through fine... I just don't like thinking about it. When people tease me about it, I get really upset. I'm worried after birthing classes I'll get even more terrified.

summer_aka_chewchew

dont worry. it is a very serreal experience but once your little one is born its all so worth the emotions and pain you go through. good luck!

mrsrose16

It's normal to be scared. I've had both a vag delivery and a c/s. You'll be fine. It is painful, but it is pain with a purpose, and doesn't last forever. Just think of that wonderful end product you'll be getting .

BNBB08

Even if you don't want a natural birth, I highly recommend reading Ina May's Guide to Giving Birth (I think that's the title) or anything else that talks about/encourages natural birth because they help you focus on how birth can be a positive experience and that we shouldn't dwell on the "pain" aspect because a lot of times since we expect the pain (due to media, horror stories, movies, etc.) that we experience more pain.  I'm sorry if this doesn't make sense...but I honestly think that book will help you to relax and realize how natural the whole process is - even if you're opting for an epidural.

KKWISC

This is my first so I have no firsthand experience. But a lot of the fear seems to come from purely not knowing. Take some classes and see all the options. I find if you know more about something you can take it head on.

vegandy

I recommend research.  I'm doing a natural birth (which obv you won't be into) so I have read as many books as I can (currently natural birth the bradley way which is great) I talk to my midwife about any concerns, I have a doula.....DH & I are taking a birthing class in April & I take prenatal yoga twice a week.  Knowledge is power.  I have no worries other than just wanting a healthy baby, it's going to happen and dreading it will only make it worse.

agdudley08

The thing is...I'm an OB nurse!  I already know just about everything I need to about the process.  It's all that knowledge that is getting me!  I know what terrible perineal tears look like & how uncomfortable the beds are & all the other things that are just plain unpleasant!  I also used to scrub in on c-sectons, so I've had a first hand view of that lovely procedure.  I always felt a little guilty when we would stretch the tissue right before getting the baby out.

MarandaMcLean05

It scares me simply because I have no idea the pain I will feel, (obviously) and I can read all I want but it can go anyway with me. So I hear ya, it is scary.

KeepingItLowKey

You know how everyone says "it's worth it"?

That's totally true. I don't think even the easiest labors are a real picnic for anyone, but I HATE pain, was TERRIFIED of childbirth, and had a med-free vaginal birth. And I decided to get pregnant again so it couldn't have been that bad... or maybe I just forgot because in the end, the baby really does make you forget about what it took to get here.

Good luck!

mrsrose16

agdudley08:

The thing is...I'm an OB nurse!  I already know just about everything I need to about the process.  It's all that knowledge that is getting me!  I know what terrible perineal tears look like & how uncomfortable the beds are & all the other things that are just plain unpleasant!  I also used to scrub in on c-sectons, so I've had a first hand view of that lovely procedure.  I always felt a little guilty when we would stretch the tissue right before getting the baby out.

Oh, you're screwed! No, I'm kidding! I've had a 4th degree tear with ds...and I still got pg 2 more times. I'm a sucker. I'm a teacher now, but really would like to be an ob nurse. I already have a master's degree, and I hear that you don't have to take as many classes. Any advice?

Micelle78

This is totally normal to worry about!  I told myself I am not allowed to obsess about it until the date gets closer.  You want to enjoy the process and at this point there are only 2 ways this baby is coming out!

agdudley08

You just made me lol!

You would probably only need to take the main nursing & skills classes, probably pharmacology & do your clinicals.  Nursing is a very rewarding career & I can't imagine doing anything else.  It is crazy stressful sometimes though. 

jacquelinethorne

This is so funny to me (not making light of your fear at all, funny bizarre not funny haha) because labor and delivery is my favorite part of the entire pregnancy process (other than the getting pregnant part, obviously). Even going into my first birth at 19 years old I don't remember having any fear at all. My mom always just made it seem like such a normal, natural process that I guess I never thought to worry. She delivered me when she was 16, med free and I weighed 8 pounds 14 ounces. My mom is not a big woman by any means, so I just always figured if she could do it, certainly I could. I'm not the biggest fan of being pregnant. The pain of labor and delivery is very temporary compared to the months of morning sickness, aches and pains of pregnancy, so I guess that's why I welcome it. And at the end of that tough process, you get to have your sweet LO in your arms. Try to be positive and confident that your labor/delivery will go smoothly, but of course, always be prepared for the worst as well. I'm sure you know from experience that stressing about it will not help you through labor or delivery. I bet you will find that your experience as an L&D nurse will help you through your labor and when the time comes, those fears will be put aside so you can focus on one of the most exciting experiences of your life.

PrincessJesci

Girls, it time to watch "The business of being born." Its a movie about the birthing process both in a hospital and at home. You can watch it instantly on Netflix and might even be able to rent it at Blockbuster.

Talk to your mothers. Be calm and don't panic. Your body knows what to do. Bring up your fears with your docs/nurses and for the love of god ATTEND SOME BIRTHING CLASSES!!!

You will be ok. Your baby will be OK. Just educate yourself. Forewarned is forearmed.

kes77

I used to worry about this when I was pregnant with my first but once you get closer to your due date you'll be ready to meet your child and you'll be fine!  I labored for 12 hours pushed for almost 4 of those and then ended up with a c-section.  It wasn't your "ideal" experience and at the time I thought I would never do it again, but you get over it and we're doing it again.  My c-section wasn't easy but definitely not the worst thing in the world.  Try not to worry!  GDLK

teamsweet

I think the more you learn about the better you'll be.  Obviously you know what goes on in most hospitals, but what about less traditional births?  And what about from the perspective of the mother?  There are positions that help with labor and the pain.  And if you end up with a c/s, you deal with it.

It can be a very natural process so try to not worry about it.  Birthing classes will help too. 

skhura

I am fearful of the whole labor process since its my 1st.  Right now I try not to think about it but I think if all those women made it through then I can make it through as well.  I am so scared of vaginal births that I can't even watch the show "baby story" on TLC....I watch it until prior to birth & then after the baby is born...lol!!

Dec31stBride

Can you try to focus on all of the uncomplicated deliveries you've seen? I can't imagine they've all involved massive tearing and screaming like the drama queens on TLC.

I wasn't scared going into L&D the 1st time, aside from worries about getting DS out safely and in good health. I did push really hard when the dr. threatened an episiotomy (so I didn't need one). I can honestly say it wasn't that painful with an epi. The epi didn't hurt at all either, IMO.

I'm a bit more nervous this time with twins and all the possible scenarios, but its gonna happen somehow someway.

Try to envision a positive experience and stick with that. Allow yourself to spend a discreet amount of time worrying, but know there are certain things you have no control over.

In your situation, I doubt watching "the business of being born" is going to help things!  

mommyrenee

let me tell you its true what they say about forgetting. i had a terrible tear & recovery...yet here I am pregnant again.  the pain is only temporary then you get to bring home an awesome little miracle. it will be ok.

ChristinaD09

vegandy:

 Knowledge is power.  

Agreed.  I have felt immensely better about labor since beginning to read about natural birth.  The girls are right that regardless of whether you want to do a natural birth, the books will make you feel alot better about the birthing process, since they do help you to realize that birthing is a natural process and that you can actually get through it easily even without meds!  Women do it all across the world, all the time.  I have not yet started the Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth, but I highly recommend this Bradley Method book just to help you learn about the labor process and think about it as natural, amazing event:

https://www.amazon.com/Natural-Childbirth-Bradley-Way-Revised/dp/0452276594/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1265032578&sr=8-1

There are also exercises in there to help you prepare for birth. If I'm feeling afraid, I just do some exercises, realizing that I am better my chances of having a more painless birth.

Maria Agnesa

Oh goodness... I am scared too!  I am aslo on my first and I just had my first labour nightmare... ugh!  Also hearing lovely stories from my mom and MIL about 30+ hours in labour with their first ones is sooooo not helping!

I'm trying to stay positive and I know I will be in good hands but it is def the unknown that has me worried as well as the crazy pain I am imagining!  However, I am still sooooo excited to meet baby! The pain will be worth it!