Need advice: church and 4 mo. old

souledoutgirl

We have just started to return to church the last 2 weeks with DD in tow. The first week, she did awesome. Barely made any noise then took a nap on DH for most of the service. Last week she kind of started tuning up, so I went to the nursing mother's room; however, I missed most of the message on the TV, because my focus was mainly on her. Did anyone here take their 4 mo. old to a nursery at church or another type of enviornment? I'm probably just nervous about leaving her and am making too big a deal about this and should just leave her, but my worries are: illness/germs and if she gets really upset. Can you tell I'm a first-time mom? Advice? Reassurance? Qualms? I'm all ears.

tabi_ja

We have taken Miles to church since he was born, and he LOVES it.  He is fascinated by the lights and the people and the singing.  Or he sleeps. lol  We had trouble with him one time, but we just pulled out a bottle, and he settled back in quietly (I always keep a bottle at the ready, just in case).  He munched away, and I was still able to participate in the service.

I would try taking her in with you again - last week may have been a fluke.  If she still has trouble, check out the nursery.  Maybe ask if you can stay with her for the first session, just to get to know the people running it?  Maybe it will make you feel a little more comfortable?

souledoutgirl

I think I will try to hold her again tomorrow. That's a good idea to stay in with her if I need to. Thanks so much!

tabi_ja

Certainly!  Let me know how it goes!

safy

At that age, taking our kids to church wasn't too much of an issue or hassle, it was when they started becoming mobile that became an issue.  At 4 mos, we kept them in their infant carrier car seats, brought bottles and pacifiers, and just took turns rocking or swinging the car seat until they fell back asleep or soothed them enough to be quiet.  I'd give it a few more tries before calling it quits, especially if she did well the first week.  There's nothing wrong with leaving them in the nursery, we would've happily done it if we felt the need to, but ours were content in their car seats especially if there was movement.  We took them to the nursery when they were a bit older and mobile because they wanted to run around. 

Stacyc625

Just wait- it gets a million times harder. Wait until they are mobile and talking. To answer your question- no i never took her to a nursery. one because we don't have one and two- i don't think i would if we did have one. But that is me personally.

If YOU and DH want to both go to church and get something out of it without having to tend to a baby- leaving her is the only way. If you are going as a family experience- you just have to make due and make your DD comfortable and quiet.

Andrewsgal

I am not a big fan of kids in the service, I feel like the kid is getting nothing out of it, and parents spend so much of the service trying to pacify the kid that they get nothing out of it. So why go?

DS loves the nursery at church we started at about 3 months and he loves the nursery worker and smiles everytime we see her. It is a nice hour break DH and I get together everyweek too.

JenniShell

We put DS in the nursery starting at 3 months old.  He just couldn't stay in the service - he would get fussy or even his happy coos would be distracting.  He never slept.

 He does great in the nursery!  And it's better for us too - we can actually concentrate on the service instead of trying to occupy him.

 However, I will say we have an excellent nursery - they have a really good system for getting in touch with the parents immediately if baby gets too upset.  I wouldn't be as comfortable leaving him if they were disorganized.

sparky88

My DD is 10M old now.  We took her to church once at 6 weeks old, 2 months, 4 months.  We put her in the nursery.  Each time she got sick with a fever. 

HarrietNJMommy

I take the kids to church, but we have a "cry room." It's connected to the Church, so you can see and hear what's going on. So, I don't get to miss anything.

I personally, wouldn't leave a 4 month old in a nursery if I'm a SAHM, and he/she isn't used to a "babysitter" type environment. That's just me.

It gets easier AFTER age 2 to take your kids to Church. I don't know many "under 2" kids that do well in Church the entire time. Our service is LONG though - about 2 hours.......

macchiatto

I didn't have much choice because we have twins and DH is one of the pastors, so I'm on my own. It wasn't really practical for me to try to handle two noisy infants in church by myself, so I've been taking them to the nursery since they were two months old! (Most other families keep their younger infants with them, but they mostly have 2 parents and 1 child rather than my situation ). It's been fine. I do think they sometimes catch colds there, which is frustrating, but the nursery workers do a great job and do their best to keep everything clean and sanitized. I'd say it's definitely worth trying the nursery and seeing if you're comfortable with it.

Also, I honestly think it's good for us as SAHMS to put our LOs in an environment like the church nursery, so they get used to being taken care of by other caretakers, being around other LOs, etc. I think it makes for an easier adjustment down the road.

HarrietNJMommy

macchiatto:

Also, I honestly think it's good for us as SAHMS to put our LOs in an environment like the church nursery, so they get used to being taken care of by other caretakers, being around other LOs, etc. I think it makes for an easier adjustment down the road. 

I agree with leaving them so they get used to being around other kids. I'm not sure the Church nursery would be somewhere I would want to do this. JMO.  We don't have a nursery in our Church - it's why we have a cry room.

safy

macchiatto:

Also, I honestly think it's good for us as SAHMS to put our LOs in an environment like the church nursery, so they get used to being taken care of by other caretakers, being around other LOs, etc. I think it makes for an easier adjustment down the road.

I totally agree. That's one of the reasons why I have my kids start preschool at 2 yrs old. I want them to get used to being away from me and start building the trust that I'll always be back for them.  I often times wish there were more options for me to get them adjusted to that younger than 2.

LJM0521

We started leaving DS in the nursery at around 4 months.  We would have him with us in the service during Praise and Worship, then I'd nurse him in the nursery and leave him when I was done.  He does get sick every once in a while, but he could get sick anywhere.  He went through a period where he had a hard time when we left, but we just told the nursery workers to come get us if he was too fussy.  Now he loves it.  He always gets a snack and they have some fun toys.  Good luck!