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Random questions...re birthday parties, exinlaws
I have a few questions tonight and didn't want to make 3 posts in a row. Lol.
What is your relationship with your ex inlaws?
What do you do/plan to do about birthday parties? Are they joint or seperate?
What was your biggest fear about being a single mom?
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Re: Random questions...re birthday parties, exinlaws
What is your relationship with your ex inlaws?
I don't have in-laws but as far as the BDs family, I don't even know any of them...and I doubt they know about Liam
What do you do/plan to do about birthday parties? Are they joint or seperate?
Personally, if it were for a milestone b-day, I would make it one big party. For others I would probably opt to let the other family do their own
What was your biggest fear about being a single mom?
Letting my LO down in some way... or having him resent me for the choices I've made for us
1. My relationship with them is the same as it always was. I still think they are selfish and disinterested in DS, even though they pretend to be involved.
2. Ugh, I don't know about birthday parties. H and I were separated from the time DS was about 5 months up until just a couple weeks before his first birthday. Honestly I think the planning of the 1st birthday party played a big part in me getting sucked back in to trying to reconcile. I was debating between having separate parties or a joint one... then I started thinking about all the separate stuff for the rest of DS's life and how much harder that would be on him. I know now that it is better for him to be in a happy home with me than in an unhappy one with both of his parents, but I still dread birthday and holiday arrangements. I would imagine for birthdays, I will have a party and invite H's family. If they want to do their own thing instead, so be it. But I don't see that happening, for the reasons listed in answer 1.
3. Money money money. I started working part-time shortly before we separated, having no idea that I would need to support myself. I'm still looking for FT work and can't find anything. So I'm working a 2nd PT job that I barely make anything at, but I can work evenings/weekends when I have access to free babysitting from my mom or H.
What is your relationship with your ex inlaws?
I have nothing against them, but I don't talk to them anymore. My ExMIL thinks everything is my fault and believes all of the lies her son tells her, and thats fine by me. I couldn't care less what they think. I haven't spoken to or seen my ExFIL since last spring. He hasn't even seen his only grandson.
What do you do/plan to do about birthday parties? Are they joint or seperate?
Seperate birthdays for sure. I do invite my (exH) neices to Pumpkin's "friend parties" though.
What was your biggest fear about being a single mom?
I am scared to raise a boy by myself. I don't know anything about boys, and I am worried I will screw him up and he will be like his father.
What is your relationship with your ex inlaws?
I hate his dad with a burning passion. He is the scum of the earth and I now know where DB gets it from. His mom on the other hand... I love her to death!! I'm not talking to her right now because I don't want to feed her information that Josh doesn't know about yet, and I don't want to tell her that because I'm afraid he'll start calling (I plan on using this against him). If he ever does build up the nerve to call me and ask about the baby then I'll gladly pick up the phone AFTER getting off the phone with him and call his mom just to chat. After the baby is born I plan on calling her and having her come do things with me and LO just for the heck of it. I love that woman!
What do you do/plan to do about birthday parties? Are they joint or seperate?
It depends on if he can try to get along with me for the day or not. If he can't then it looks like they will be seperate. If we can be friends (he says we can't) then we'll have them together if he wants.
What was your biggest fear about being a single mom?
I am scared to raise a boy by myself. I don't know anything about boys, and I am worried I will screw him up and he will be like his father. <---THIS! But luckily I have some amazing men in my life that will stick by my side no matter what. And I'm sure they can offer advice along the way. They are good people so I'm sure DS (if it is a S) will turn out just fine.
1. As far as the ex inlaws (well we weren't married but same deal) I get along with all of them, and very close with his cousins. We were pregnant together so ya know. However, his mom thinks that I am the one for him and I need to wait for him to straighten himself out... LOL. They are about the same as him though. She claims she wants to see them we will try to make plans and she just always bails.
2. I'm don't know what to do about this. Their b-day isn't until June, but I would love to invite everyone. I have no bad feels toward his family. The only complicated thing is I have been dating someone, and we actually had a talk last night about us and he is def not going any where. So I don't know if that would go well with him being there.
3. That I won't be able to give them all that I would like too, and to give them each the attention I should.
What is your relationship with your ex inlaws?
Ummm based on my previous post to ex-MIL you can probably guess it's pretty horrible. His mom is the devil as far as I am concerned. I have never seen someone stick their head so far up their a$$ regarding their child-it is sickening. Used to get along with his grandparents but he manipulated them so I think now they are confused.
What do you do/plan to do about birthday parties? Are they joint or seperate?
Probably do them on my own since DB can't show up to anything. Who knows, maybe by the time DS turns one DB will be dead in a gutter somewhere....
What was your biggest fear about being a single mom?
Going at it alone-it is sad and difficult. And I don't want DS to feel different than the other kids. I don't want him to wish we had stayed together so he could be like all the other kids.
What is your relationship with your ex inlaws?
Pretty much the same as it was. They are all on the west coast and I am on the east coast so we never see each other. I talk to my MIL about once a week. I don't hold anything against her and she doesn't hold anything against me. We are both very disappointed in her son.
What do you do/plan to do about birthday parties? Are they joint or seperate?
Since his family is on the other side of the country her parties will just be us. He wouldn't come to a party with my family or friends anyway.
What was your biggest fear about being a single mom?
Being able to afford everything and do everything myself. STBXH was a SAHD but he was saving me tons on day care and he was bringing in GI Bill money because he is a veteran and was in school at night. I am very pleased that I have been able to afford everything on my own so far. Who knows what will happen when I have 2 in day care though!
Eek. Harsh?? Although I don't blame you for saying it in the least bit.
To answer my own post...
1. I still talk to mil 2-4 times a week. She swears H is the one for me, and that I will always be family, even if it it means we end up getting remarried at some point. There is no way in hell, once it's over...it's over. I talk to two sils one more then the other. In fact I have been with her the last 4 days. Lol.
2. I have basically told H that as long as we are on good terms this year we will do a joint party, but that I can't make any promises for the future. I think things would get really odd if and when I get a bf.
3.My biggest fear like a couple others is not being able to do everything for dd that I would like. Though I hope to be in and out of school and doing okay before she is old enough to realize anything!