Adoption

would you go to an agency seminar without your DH?

My DH got called into work today... And I'm trying to decide whether I should go to an agency info session this afternoon without him, or wait for the next info session (which is in 2 months, I think).  I don't really want to wait two more months for the next info session, but I also think I might be pretty self-conscious/nervous attending without my DH -- after all, this is a journey for both of us, and it seems weird to go to a seminar by myself.  Any thoughts? 

(ETA that my DH says he's OK with either decision, and the choice of whether to go today or not is up to me.  If I do go, he asked me to take notes for him... If I don't go, he says we can go to other info sessions together.)

Re: would you go to an agency seminar without your DH?

  • I think since it's just an info session, I would go on without my DH.  You could just tell people he's working and you wanted to come on and get the info, but I doubt anyone will even ask.  You can gather all the information and discuss it with your husband later.  That's just me though.  You need to do what you're comfortable with whether you have to wait 2 more months or not.
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  • It depends. What are you going to get out of it and how do you make decisions as a couple? If you just want the info, then go. If your DH is anything like mine, he would like a summary anyway. If it's about choosing an agency between two or something like that, then I would wait unless DH is comfortable with you making that decision because that's about feel and you can't really convey that without him being there.
  • I would definitely go and gather information.  You can always attend the next one with your DH if he feels he needs to hear it in person.
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  •  I think it all depends on his attitude toward adoption.  If you are both in agreement and he doesn't mind getting info through you, I say go.  If he is reluctant or a  "Do-it-myself' kind of person it might be best to wait.

    My DH tend toward the latter...regardless of the subject.  I get gung=ho about something, do lots of research, start telling him about it, and get little response.  When he finally  decides he want to know about something, he starts his research and "discovers" all the things I have been trying to tell him.

    dd(Brianna) 11/01/94, ds(Bram)10/17/95, ds(Jesse)9/26/97, dd (Annie Ruth) 7/27/05 5mc Jan '08, May '08, Feb '09, Sept '09, Apr '11 "And can it be that in a world so full and busy, the loss of one weak creature makes a void in any heart, so wide and deep that nothing but the width and depth of vast eternity can fill it up." - Charles Dickens

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  • Just read your edit.  In that case, I would go because I wouldn't want to wait another 2 months.
    dd(Brianna) 11/01/94, ds(Bram)10/17/95, ds(Jesse)9/26/97, dd (Annie Ruth) 7/27/05 5mc Jan '08, May '08, Feb '09, Sept '09, Apr '11 "And can it be that in a world so full and busy, the loss of one weak creature makes a void in any heart, so wide and deep that nothing but the width and depth of vast eternity can fill it up." - Charles Dickens

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  • I would, just take good notes for your hubby. When we went to our info seminars there were women without hubby's for the same reason. I say GO! ;)
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  • Thanks ladies... You've persuaded me!  I just felt a little self-conscious about going by myself.  But you've reassured me and persuaded me to go.  Smile

  • Considering that DH went to one without me, I'd be fine with it.
  • I'd go without him, even though it's not ideal. What if in 2 months he gets called into work again?
  • I would go without him as well.  It's information, not a one-on-one meeting getting to know the agency and them getting to know you.  I don't know what you DH is like, but I know mine doesn't like to do research, just be presented with the facts short and sweet, so he would want me to go alone anyway.
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  • I know you've already decided to go -- but I wanted to throw in that I went w/o my husband to ours as well.

    My husband works on the river for 21 days at a time and he was out on the boat during our session. I didn't want to have to wait and he didn't mind me going alone since the process takes a while.

    Everything turned out well! GL

  • imageCissi64:

     My DH tend toward the latter...regardless of the subject.  I get gung=ho about something, do lots of research, start telling him about it, and get little response.  When he finally  decides he want to know about something, he starts his research and "discovers" all the things I have been trying to tell him.

    Mine is the exact same way!

    I agree with pp, what if he gets called in to work again two months from now?

    Married 9-4-04

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  • Our agency required that we both attend, so it would have been counter productive, as he would have had to go anyway.
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