MIL

summerne

So I am having 3 showers..(Lucky me!) One my mom's side of the family is throwing, one my friends are throwing, and one that my MIL is throwing. Do I need to invite my MIL to the one my mom's family is throwing? I am not including my mom in the one MIL is doing. DH suggested she might want to come. She irritates me, I should add. She is throwing a shower, which is very nice, but I really don't know the people she is inviting and I feel a bit awkward about it. ( I am making DH come to that one with me.) Is it ok to not invite her to the one my relatives are doing? WWYD?

DaniLovesPink

I think grandma's-to-be should be invited to every shower.  If she comes, there will be plenty of people there for you to mingle with and be able to mostly avoid her.  If she's not comfortable, she won't come.  I think an invite would be nice, though.

EastCoastBride

Honestly, I don't think you have to.  the shower and baby are about YOU.  Not the "grandma's".  If she weren't throwing a shower herself, sure, definitely invite her.  But in this situation, I don't think you "have" to. 

summerne

I am not going to invite her. She mentioned to me when I had 2 wedding showers that I shouldn't invite the same people to 2. Besides she is nosey and makes rude comments to me about me and also about my family. I have tried to be friends with her, but I think it's best if I keep her at a distance. You should hear the things she says about her granddaughters she has now.( about their looks, weight, etc..they are 8 and 10!) I do not want her to have the benefit of doing that to my child.

mrsmegs06

My MIL did not invite my mom to the shower she threw, and my aunt invited my MIL to my family's shower. She was annoying and embarassing...I wish she just came to her own shower. I don't think it was necessary at all to invite her since she didn't invite my mom...but I didn't know she wasn't until after the first shower. Ugh...if I could do it over again.

hopefulmom

My mom was invited to 2 of my 3 showers.  One family, one friends and one coworkers.  The only one she didn't attend was the one for my coworkers.

brooke9280

I figure that we're all adults and we should act accordingly. Unfortunately for some of us (me included), our MILs don't always act appropriately. Mine couldn't be bothered to come to my bridal shower. She didn't buy us a wedding gift and never offered to help (even though our wedding was a complete DIY shindig).  Furthermore, I haven't even heard a single congratulations from her since we annouced the baby. 

I try to remind myself though that this baby isn't just about me.  This is just as much my husband's baby as mine. He's embarrassed by his mom but it is his mom.  I would never hurt my husband's feelings by not including his mother.  She's innapropriate, rude, and overall trashy but I can get over all of it if I know that it is important to my husband.  Sometimes we just have to suck it up and be the better person. 

My suggestion would be to invite your mother in law. Yes, she will probably come and embarass herself but you have to remember that she will be embarassing herself, not you.  When my mother in law acts like an idiot no one thinks anything about it- they know she's lame and they love my husband and me just the same.  Then again, if my husband didn't care if I invited her, maybe I would not be such a big person.

Good luck!!!

summerne

I ended up inviting her. We shall see what happens. I decided to just let my feelings go and realize that she is responsible for herself and actions, not me.