How did you potty train your reluctant boy?

cranburycakes

My older son will be three next month.  So far, I have tried not to put pressure on him with regard to potty training.  I'll ask him once in a while if he wants to sit on the potty but, with the exception of once or twice, he always refuses.  The few times he sat on the potty, he didn't produce anything but I gave him candy for trying, nonetheless.  We have all the cool potty seats, underpants ready, etc.

He is very verbal and has no problem communicating about anything and everything.  I'm guessing the potty thing is a control issue..... 

His preschool teacher suggested that my husband invite him in to watch him pee, which he happily does.  However, our son does not get inspired to try it himself. 

 If your boy was stubborn and hard to potty train, what finally worked?  Cold turkey into underpants?  Any advice?  Thank you  

  

butterbeansmama

It comes in time. It is really not anything that can be pushed, it's all up to the child on this one. I tried to potty train P before he was 2.5 and he sat on the potty a few times (never did anything) and then started to not want to even sit on it at all. So we took a break from it. A month or so later, he was all for it and never looked back.

Hooray2005

Honestly, I'd wait a few months.  Let him keep watching DH and the other kiddos at school if possible.  Don't push it (if your little one is head strong at all this will just delay things) - keep the potty seat and underwear out so DS can see it and know he has access to it if he decides one day he wants to try.

My little guy didn't train until he was 3ys 3mo old, and it only took a week or so once we did it.  It was on his own initiation, saying one day "I want to wear underwear" - we switched him full time to training unders (LOVE Hanna Andersson!) and never looked back.  Poop training took a bit longer, but using lots and lots and lots of matchbox cars as "poop prizes" helped (posted about this about a week ago - I can find the post if you want it).

Also, if the school can help with the process, that can be helpful - they can make it another part of his school day

wellfleet04

I don't think it's specific to boys, or maybe my DD is an outlier, but she is 2 yrs 8 months and REFUSES to pottytrain.  It is most definitely a control issue in our house.  She is highly verbal and very smart.  She can recite all the incentives we've tried (sticker chart, candy rewards, big presents, etc etc etc).  But she won't actually park her butt on the potty.  She'll wear undies, say that pee goes in the potty, and then pee on the floor and whistle "lalalalala" when I try to talk to her about "next time we'll try to go in the potty."  She doesn't care AT ALL if she has an accident, or about being a big girl, or anything else. 

It is SUPER frustrating, but I have just had to back off because ultimately I cannot control it.  Sorry this is not helpful at all, but you are not alone! 

Marce921

DS is the same way. Though when we suggest that he goes on the potty, he FA-REAKS out! So, I occasionally will still talk to him about it. Santa gave him LOTS of undies and a couple potty training books and I'm just going to wait for him to say he WANTS to do it. Part of the problem (I think) is that he's constipated a lot (because he holds it and it's huge!) and our ped suggested using Miralax to see if that helps. She thinks if we poop train first (because he hates having a poopy diaper, but could care less about wet ones), then pee training will soon follow. We'll see....

Purrrfect433

Ben is a control-seeker and it definitely played out during potty-training! He was potty-trained well before he was finally out of diapers but he needed to be in control of the situation and refused to wear underwear despite being able to use the potty. I let him go diaperless all the time and did a reward system for when he'd wear underwear. A few months befor his fourth birthday, we explained that once he turned four, diapers wouldn't be available to him any longer. We'd casually remind him in an upbeat way leading up to his birthday. He's been in underwear full-time since he turned four and doing great!

I know with him, we need to find the balance of power where he feels like he has enough control over his situation while still doing what's expected of him. In regards to potty-training, that meant letting him be naked A LOT and not pressuring him, but gently pushing him towards it with a definite end in sight. GL!

Dimplz

What worked was waiting until he was really ready to do it. Of course I was really hopeful when he was 2 and it didn't help I was getting pressured by my mom and MIL about it but DS didn't want any part of it.

We tried in earnest when he turned 3 and still was met with big time resistance.

What I think finally turned the tide was when he started preschool and he saw his friends going to the potty there. However he never asked to go to the potty but I think he saw that this is what other kids do as well so it made the idea seem less foreign to him. Well one day I got out his old potty sticker chart and bribed him with ice cream (which is a big time treat here) if he filled the whole row with stars. He potty trained himself that same day. He was potty trained day and night right then.

My advice is to wait until he's really ready for it! Good luck!