If you have weaned a toddler... — The Bump
Attachment Parenting

If you have weaned a toddler...

How did you go about it?

DD was down to 3 nursing sessions/day (wake-up, nap and bedtime) but has gotten to wanting to nurse all the time now if we're at home (cold weather, snow, etc.) She gets very aggressive and upset if I turn her down, even if I offer fun activities (coloring, playing, snacks, etc.) as a detractor. I can't plan day-long outings every day, especially now in winter. I feel like I have to wean her completely now to address this because she just won't accept nursing less times/day if she sees me around. (And I am with her most of the time now that my freelance business is slow.)

I am exhausted, frustrated, feel completely out of control, etc. I never thought I would feel this way about nursing.

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Re: If you have weaned a toddler...

  • Have you read Mothering your Nursing Toddler.  They discuss some weaning questions in there and I do remember parts about "needy" toddlers.  There is also a weaning book, maybe someone else knows the name of it. 

    Sorry you are frustrated with nursing.  Hopefully you can find something that works, so you can end nursing on a very good note.

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  • image Meg&Jesse:

    Have you read Mothering your Nursing Toddler.  They discuss some weaning questions in there and I do remember parts about "needy" toddlers.  There is also a weaning book, maybe someone else knows the name of it. 

    Sorry you are frustrated with nursing.  Hopefully you can find something that works, so you can end nursing on a very good note.

    I did read "Mothering Your Nursing Toddler" and I distinctly remember a part about toddlers wanting to wean more during big developmental phases. DD has definitely been making quick progress in the talking dept. and I'm sure this is both exciting and a little scary for her. I keep thinking of MYNT and feeling like I should stick it out while she's in this challenging phase, but I have ended the last few days in tears over how much of the day I spent nursing DD. My breasts need a rest, and so do I!

    I'll look at the book again and see what it says about weaning. Thanks for reminding me.

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  • image anna7602:
    image Meg&Jesse:

    Have you read Mothering your Nursing Toddler.  They discuss some weaning questions in there and I do remember parts about "needy" toddlers.  There is also a weaning book, maybe someone else knows the name of it. 

    Sorry you are frustrated with nursing.  Hopefully you can find something that works, so you can end nursing on a very good note.

    I did read "Mothering Your Nursing Toddler" and I distinctly remember a part about toddlers wanting to wean more during big developmental phases. DD has definitely been making quick progress in the talking dept. and I'm sure this is both exciting and a little scary for her. I keep thinking of MYNT and feeling like I should stick it out while she's in this challenging phase, but I have ended the last few days in tears over how much of the day I spent nursing DD. My breasts need a rest, and so do I!

    I'll look at the book again and see what it says about weaning. Thanks for reminding me.

    I feel for you.  It is frustrating when you feel like nothing more than a milk machine!  Perhaps the book has some suggestions or maybe you can check a local LLL.  Someone out there has to have some good suggestions for you!

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  • image anna7602:

    I am exhausted, frustrated, feel completely out of control, etc. I never thought I would feel this way about nursing.

    I am sorry you feel this way.  I am having some nursing issues of my own, and it's really hard to dislike something that used to be so wonderful.  

    I am starting the process by making sessions shorter instead of waiting for DS to finish on his own, with the idea that eventually we'll just stop all together.  I've been doing it about a week, and so far DS hasn't complained about stopping.  Does your DD get upset when you end a session before she is ready? 

  • image Meg&Jesse:

    Have you read Mothering your Nursing Toddler.  They discuss some weaning questions in there and I do remember parts about "needy" toddlers.  There is also a weaning book, maybe someone else knows the name of it. 

    Is it How Weaning Happens?  I haven't read it yet, but I've heard it is excellent.  

    I have no suggestions, but I'm sorry you're frustrated.  

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  • My DS has been this way for the past week as well.  I would let him nurse, but I cut the time short to only 5-7 minutes.  I would also offer cuddles and lots to drink throughout the day, which both seemed to help.  I realized that his 2 yr old molars are coming in and I think the nursing helps with the pain, so I feel better about letting him nurse if he wants.  Sorry, no suggestions for weaning though, I have no idea how I'm going to do it.  I'm hoping he'll just wake up one day and say 'All done'.
  • I think allowing her to nurse, but restricting the amount of time is a good compromise. It probably is just a stage, and she'll be through it in a few weeks.

    I started weaning DD when she was 34 months, so it was a completely different process than trying to wean a toddler.

    Annalise Marie 05.29.06
    Charlotte Ella 07.16.10
    Emmeline Grace 03.27.13
  • Thanks, ladies! I'll start with trying to cut sessions short and see if that makes both of us happier. Happy new year to one and all.
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  • Pregnancy worked well for me, my younger 2 boys self-weaned when I was about 3 months pregnant with the next. 

    My daughter has been a little trickier, but now at 28 months she's starting to lose interest. We're down to twice a day, and the duration is decreasing daily, I think in a few wks she'll be done. I've been encouraging by being active with her as a distraction - tickling, etc.

    I've read that 18-20ish months is a very difficult time to wean.

    Good luck. It's very bitter-sweet for me - she's my last - but I've been continuously pregnant and/or breastfeeding for 6 1/2 yrs now and am feeling DONE. 

    Michelle
    3 boys (15, 8, 6), 1 girl (4)
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