Got verbally b!tchslapped by the boys' DCP last night.

mamarazzi

I told her nearly a month ago that we wouldn't be needing her for four weeks between December and January.  Well, H and I decided we don't want to take the kids back after the break -- we're going to use the time off to find alternate care.  So, I told her yesterday when I picked the kids up that it would be their last last day -- that they wouldn't be coming back in January.  We have no contract and she's never communicated any policies to me so I knew nothing of any "2 week notice" -- besides, I'd already told her they weren't going to be there for a month.

In the moment, she just said "okay."  She seemed a bit pissed, but that's all she said.  I asked for the boys' stuff and she said that they needed to leave right then and I'd have to come back.

An hour later, she called my cell and UNLEASHED on me.  She said she was running a business and I was being unprofessional, ungrateful, unfair, rude...  I pointed out that her yelling at me on the phone wasn't exactly professional and that if she wanted to run a business, she should have policies in place and that her behavior wasn't making me want to meet her in the middle (I think she wanted me to pay her for the next two weeks...even though my kids weren't going to be there anyway and she'd known that for a month).  It was really awkward.  She just kept rattling on for 45 minutes.  I told her if she'd handled herself calmly and explained her expectations, I would have been happy to work with her.  She said "Pffft.  I don't need your handouts.  You owe me NOTHING."  Um, okay.  So what was the purpose of the phone call?  Then she said "Don't come crying to me when you need someone to watch your kids."  Okay, crazy.  I don't think that will be a problem.

My good friend takes her baby there and I didn't want to say anything to her about the conversation I had with the DCP because I didn't want to color her perception.  So, imagine my surprise when she called me last night to tell me the DCP called her, bawling, and told her what happened.  I find that highly unprofessional -- putting my friend in the middle like that.

I'm so glad to be done with her.  Her reaction just firmly cemented we made the right decision.

mattslady

She sounds crazy, but I'm not sure just telling her the way you did was respectful or professional on your part either.

 

kevschickee2

mattslady:

She sounds crazy, but I'm not sure just telling her the way you did was respectful or professional on your part either.

 

I agree.  She sounds unprofessional  but you really should have given her 2 weeks notice.  It is unfair for her now I mean this is how she pays her bills.  I

mamarazzi

mattslady:

She sounds crazy, but I'm not sure just telling her the way you did was respectful or professional on your part either.

 

I'm fully aware that I could have given her more notice. I wanted to tell her last week, but there were other parents there when I picked up both times.  I was prepared to give her at least an extra week's pay, but since she just said "okay" and shooed us out the door, we didn't really get a chance to discuss it further.

Mrs.Tony

I see nothing wrong with what you did. You told her they would not be there for that month and then she had a month's notice that they were not coming back. She was pretty unprofessional in the way that she handled that whole thing. If she wants policies in place regarding notice, then she should write something up.

Halo79RN

mattslady:

She sounds crazy, but I'm not sure just telling her the way you did was respectful or professional on your part either.

 

ditto... and around the holidays.  I mean it's one thing to give notice so that she can fill the slot.... but just to lay it on her the last day.  I don't care if there were parents around, you call or you tell you her you need to speak with her in private.  I don't know how her financial situation is... but I can only imagine she's stressed out about paying bills now... for her go apeshit on ya and then call another parent.  that or she was freaked the other parent would leave too. 

crappy. 

UGAbride

I think you handled it fine, actually, since they aren't going to be there for the next 4 weeks you really gave her those 4 weeks notice?!  Am I the only one that sees that?  B/c even if you were not paying her for those 4 weeks, she wasn't expecting money from you again until January, so you gave her plenty of notice. 

But she handled it horribly, and sounds like you made the right decision to pull your kids out of there.

kevschickee2

UGAbride:

I think you handled it fine, actually, since they aren't going to be there for the next 4 weeks you really gave her those 4 weeks notice?!  Am I the only one that sees that?  B/c even if you were not paying her for those 4 weeks, she wasn't expecting money from you again until January, so you gave her plenty of notice. 

But she handled it horribly, and sounds like you made the right decision to pull your kids out of there.

That isn't considered notice.  It is considered a vacation it isn't the same thing.  In my moms daycare you would still have to pay that month since she didn't close the parents chose to keep the kids out.  

eclaires

kevschickee2:

UGAbride:

I think you handled it fine, actually, since they aren't going to be there for the next 4 weeks you really gave her those 4 weeks notice?!  Am I the only one that sees that?  B/c even if you were not paying her for those 4 weeks, she wasn't expecting money from you again until January, so you gave her plenty of notice. 

But she handled it horribly, and sounds like you made the right decision to pull your kids out of there.

That isn't considered notice.  It is considered a vacation it isn't the same thing.  In my moms daycare you would still have to pay that month since she didn't close the parents chose to keep the kids out.  

But mamarazzi's provider didn't require her to pay and did know she was going to be out for a month, so how is that even relevant, kevs?  I think it's reasonable to consider that month as notice, even if I think this DCP stuff is kind of drama drama from mamarazzi.

JOEBunny

Assuming that you have used her for a while and she has some attachment to your family, I would be mad too.  Probably would not have called you up, but I would have been mad. 

Daycares around here have two year wait list.  I know people who have paid for 6 month or more for daycare they were not using while on Maternity leave or between jobs because they would not be able to get another spot.  People are really nice to their DCP because of this, or maybe just because they entrust them with their kids.  

Your lucky your in a position to not have to pay whenever you don't want to and it sounds a bit to me like you took full advantage of that.  

kevschickee2

eclaires:

kevschickee2:

UGAbride:

I think you handled it fine, actually, since they aren't going to be there for the next 4 weeks you really gave her those 4 weeks notice?!  Am I the only one that sees that?  B/c even if you were not paying her for those 4 weeks, she wasn't expecting money from you again until January, so you gave her plenty of notice. 

But she handled it horribly, and sounds like you made the right decision to pull your kids out of there.

That isn't considered notice.  It is considered a vacation it isn't the same thing.  In my moms daycare you would still have to pay that month since she didn't close the parents chose to keep the kids out.  

But mamarazzi's provider didn't require her to pay and did know she was going to be out for a month, so how is that even relevant, kevs?  I think it's reasonable to consider that month as notice, even if I think this DCP stuff is kind of drama drama from mamarazzi.

I think it is relevant because the DCP was counting on the buisness after that month was up.  She was nice enough to hold a spot for a month which she doesn't have to do.  I just think it is a crappy thing to do to someone esp sp close to the holidays.

AWD

I agree she shouldn't of called the other mother and complained to her about what happened etc... However I would of been a little pissed as well if I were her. I mean what if say you were going on vacation for 2 weeks or even maternity leave for 8 and the last day you were there before your leave/vacation your boss said to you oh by the way we won't be needing you back... you would probably be a little pissed as well.

 Even if there were other families there and you didn't have a chance to speak with her  and give her a notice when dropping off or picking up you could of at least wrote her a note and asked to speak with her at her convience or whatever in privacy.  I think both of you could of been a little more professional about it.

eclaires

kevschickee2:

eclaires:

kevschickee2:

UGAbride:

I think you handled it fine, actually, since they aren't going to be there for the next 4 weeks you really gave her those 4 weeks notice?!  Am I the only one that sees that?  B/c even if you were not paying her for those 4 weeks, she wasn't expecting money from you again until January, so you gave her plenty of notice. 

But she handled it horribly, and sounds like you made the right decision to pull your kids out of there.

That isn't considered notice.  It is considered a vacation it isn't the same thing.  In my moms daycare you would still have to pay that month since she didn't close the parents chose to keep the kids out.  

But mamarazzi's provider didn't require her to pay and did know she was going to be out for a month, so how is that even relevant, kevs?  I think it's reasonable to consider that month as notice, even if I think this DCP stuff is kind of drama drama from mamarazzi.

I think it is relevant because the DCP was counting on the buisness after that month was up.  She was nice enough to hold a spot for a month which she doesn't have to do.  I just think it is a crappy thing to do to someone esp sp close to the holidays.

That's fine, and I don't disagree.  I meant the part about it having to be paid at your mom's and it being vacation.  Your f/u was much clearer though, so I agree.

CleoKitty

AWD:

I agree she shouldn't of called the other mother and complained to her about what happened etc... However I would of been a little pissed as well if I were her. I mean what if say you were going on vacation for 2 weeks or even maternity leave for 8 and the last day you were there before your leave/vacation your boss said to you oh by the way we won't be needing you back... you would probably be a little pissed as well.

 Even if there were other families there and you didn't have a chance to speak with her  and give her a notice when dropping off or picking up you could of at least wrote her a note and asked to speak with her at her convience or whatever in privacy.  I think both of you could of been a little more professional about it.

Exactly. 

It was a crappy thing to do to someone at any time of the year, much less right before Christmas. 

Saying that you couldn't give her proper notice because other parents were there last week is a bit of a cop-out, IMO. You could have waited around a few minutes until it cleared out to speak with her, you could have called her on the phone or you could have handed her a letter with written notice on it. 

I 100% agree that the DCP did not handle her emotions professionally at all and what she did was not acceptable as well. Overall this just seems like it was poorly handled all the way around. 

MommyofAlissa

Is she licensed? We had AJ w/ a DCP that was BSC, but she didn't start out that way. The last month AJ was there, the DCP just went off the freakin' deep end. So we pulled her, and we didn't pay the 2wks either. She actually had a contract saying that she required that, but since she wasn't licensed in the state of NE, her contract wasn't valid.

Anyway--if she isn't licensed, she isn't allowed to have the same policies that licensed DCP have. If she wants those "luxuries" so to speak, she needs to shell out the couple hundred or whatever it is and have the Fire Marshall inspect her house and get licensed.

 

 

neesernicole

I'm so glad to be done with her.  Her reaction just firmly cemented we made the right decision.

Exactly.

amiamish

Wow! That's so rude. I've ended a DCP relationship that was a good friend as well, it was extremely awkward but at least she was professional! Your lady freggin' flipped her sh!t. And then to call her other "client" / your friend and vent to her--wow. I hope your friend starts looking for other care too. That girl seems whack.

UGAbride

My point was that she DID give two weeks+ notice, her boys just happen to not be attending these next few weeks....so say they WERE going to be there these next two weeks, their last day would be around January 1st.  It sounds like mamarazzi WAS prepared to pay at least one week, and if they had just talked about it professionally (instead of being shooed out the door and then call her up and yell at her later) then I bet mamarazzi would have been willing to pay 2 weeks worth, no?  It's not like she'd be paying double, since they were going to have the kids home anyway.  I mean, I would not want my kids to attend somewhere like that when the provider already has notice they are leaving...how would she treat her kids?  I'd pull them out the day I was ready, and pay the "fine" of 2 weeks.