Upstate NY Babies

Discipline advice, please

Today, as we were leaving DC, I told Bambino that we had to leave right away because we had to get home.  (This meant that he couldn't dilly dally and play with stuff in the hallway on our way out, which he sometimes enjoys.)  This wasn't to his liking so he smacked me.  At home, he would have had a time-out, but since we weren't home....  When we got to the car, he smacked at me again.  What would you have done?  Would you still give a time-out when you got home?  What would you do?  TIA

Re: Discipline advice, please

  • Have you read Happiest Toddler on the Block?  The Fast Food rule?

    Here is my best try at summing 100+ pages up on how to handle this situation.  Instead of concentrating on a punishment for this situation, try to offer a better way to deal with how he felt.  The FF rule is basically repeating back what your toddler said, or giving them the words to express how they feel.  Like when he smacked you, get down to his level and first acknowledge how he feels in as few words as possible with a tone to match his feelings.  Like "You are mad at Mommy!  Mad.  Mad! Because Mommy said we have to leave quickly today"  Once he gets that you understand him, then you tell him it is never OK to smack Mommy and offer something he can do when he feels mad like stomping his foot.   Often a toddler hitting or biting is in response to not knowing any other way to deal with their feelings, and by hitting you again, he was trying to show you again how he was feeling because, to him, you weren't understanding him.


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  • JenJar - He's 2 1/2.

    Cutemin - I did talk to him and told him how it made mommy sad, he hurt mommy, that that I understood he was disappointed, etc. I just didn't include that in here for brevity and because he persisted.  This isn't usually an issue, but I will look into the book(s) you referenced.  Thank you for the suggestion.

  • I think Cutemin's advice was great.  At 2 1/2 I'm not sure that a time out after you got home would have had a big impact on him.  I'm going to check out The Happiest Toddler on the Block, too :)  I loved THBOT and forgot there was a toddler version.
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