Blood tests have been ordered.
But I don't really want to go through all this and learn that I might not be able to have children.
How come I feel like I'll be one of *those women* who just can't have kids? It's this gut feeling (And using the term *those women* is not intended to stir up anything with anyone on this board. 'Cause seriously, it's all about me right now and this is the only place I feel that I can vent).
Is this what I (us) get for waiting so long? Waiting until I (we) took care of my (our) selfish wants and needs before wanting to bring a child into my (our) life?
We went into this with the whole fun loving "whatever happens, happens" mentality. And when it didn't happen after a year and a half, it stopped being fun. The house is starting to feel empty. The holidays don't seem so fun to either of us this year. And I REALLY don't want to go to the Christmas family gathering where everyone coos and makes a big deal about the toddler in the 'fam.
I'm feel like I'm starting to turn into a bitter barren woman. And I don't like it.