Is this normal for newborns?

kross605

Im a first time mom with very little baby experience so all of this newborn stuff is new to me. My daughter will not let you put her down without wailing unless shes totally asleep. This means that DH or I are constantly holding her when she's not nursing or asleep.  Is there a way to break her of this habit or is this just how new babies are? When does this constant need for holding end? And Im sorry if I sound harsh, I do love holding my LO, but when Im up for 2 hours in the middle of the night AFTER she's been fed and changed, walking around the house with a swaddled newborn attempting to sing my entire itunes library, I just wish I had more options to soothe her!! Its so exhausting.

TarheelsInNJ

I completely understand the frustration (I'm having a day like that myself!), and yes, it's normal!! I'd suggest getting a carrier, like a Moby wrap or a sling. They are lifesavers... LO will still feel like she's being held, but your hands will be free. I've slept with my son in the carrier too.

ilenegrace

You can't hold your newborn too much, however I know breaks can be great... Have you tried a swing or bouncer? My LO hates his swing however loves his bouncer because it cradles him better. I put him in there and he is pretty content and even falls asleep in it. It has been our lifesaver since he loves to be held too.

atlbride23

honestly, this is totally normal for some newborns (at least they sleep a lot for the first couple of weeks, right?).  One of my girls was like this and at 10 weeks, she still needs to be held most of the time.  She'll only be put down (swing, bouncy chair, floor, we've tried it all) for 15-20 minutes, max.

Have you tried wearing her?  It will at least be easier on your back, and she'll probably cry less.

jen5-03

yes.

not all babies are that way, but some are - my DD was. Since your siggie says you're 41wk pg I'm guessing your baby is only a week or so old? She's just got her days and nights mixed up a little and is still adjusting to life on the outside. It will get better, but it can take some time. She is too tiny to have "habits", don't worry about bad habits until at least 3mo, just hold her as much as you can. For daytime, try wearing her in a sling or wrap so at least you can move around easier and have your hands free.

In the middle of the night I recommend holding her but try to interact with her as little as possible - don't talk to her or make eye contact as this helps wake baby up and keep her active. Only sing to her if she's crying and needs calming, but not if she's awake and content and just not sleeping. Try swaddling to see if that will get her to sleep. Try setting her down and keeping your hand on her to see if that will keep her asleep or calm enough to go back to sleep, the weight of my hand is sometimes enough to keep DS asleep that way.

AMYfromKY

Yes that is normal. In fact you're lucky she will let you put he down when she's sleeping.I still hold Henry 95% of the time. He takes all naps in my arms and only sleeps in his crib at night. He will occasionally take a short nap in his swing.Think about it this way...she was held for 9 months. Why wouldn't she want to be now.

Mrs.Babbsy

I would suggest getting the happiest baby on the block dvd.

kross605

Thanks for all the ideas, Ill have to try a few of these out. I tried the swing, bouncy seat, moby wrap etc but she cant handle more than 10 minutes or so in those things and seemed to hate the moby--i think it was scary and suffocating to her, I have to try another wrap style I think. Can you make it into a basic sling? I also know all about the 5 S's for soothing a baby (and have tried several) but the thing is, she's not fussy and crying or anything like that, she's just completely quiet and content and alert but when you put her down she's not having it! Im glad to hear that it gets better, and if this is my parenting issue, I guess its a good one to have, but still, it gets exhausting and Im sad to admit that I love when she sleeps because I get both my hands back!!

SymphonyGirl

It's normal for a lot of newborns.  My son was like that and it was incredibly exhausting.  He constantly needed to be held, and preferably in motion--so I did the walk and bounce pretty much all the time or was in a rocking chair if he'd let me sit down.  I don't remember too clearly (I think I blocked out some of the awfulness), but I feel like it settled down a little around 4 months.  Hang in there.  You can do it!  And, as hope for the future--baby #2 is totally mellow and can lie down in her bassinet drowsy and go to sleep.