Can someone talk me down?

californiastars

We are currently on a TTC break. We have been TTCing for 2 years, I have PCOS, I take metformin, a m/c last Christmas, 5 failed rounds of Clomid, cp last cycle and starting in January we are starting injections and IUI. 

I was doing good knowing that we are on a break until January and I kept telling myself not to worry about anything. Well I have been spotting for the past 4 days. I started spotting on cd19. There is no sign of O and the RE doesn't seem to think it is anything to worry about.

I don't know why but tonight I am just feeling very overwhelmed and like I am about to have an anxiety attach. What is going on with my body? What if the injections don't work? What if the IUI doesn't work? This is our last chance. We can't do IVF. We can't afford it (DH doesn't want to spend our life savings on something that may not work)

I just have so many thoughts racing through my mind, I feel like I want to break down and cry. I don't know if I can handle this anymore. I don't know if I can do this. And if one more person tells me to just relax and it will happen, I am going to stab them in the eye. 

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I am not wise enough to offer any real advice, but I am very, very sorry you are going through this. Anxiety sucks, and I wish I knew a way to make it easier for you. *big hugs*

griffenhc

I too don't have enough ttc experience to offer advice, but I do offer support and *hugs*.  I do however have plenty of experience with anxiety attacks.  I know this sounds stupid, but it can help with the physiological symptoms: make fists and put them out in front of you facing each other. turn one in clockwise circles and the other in counter clockwise circles.  Then switch up the directions.  Or try the pat your head and rub your tummy thing.  It makes both sides of your brain work at the same time, which is the opposite of what's going on during an anxiety attack.   HTH.