Separation anxiety or more?

Quazel

I nurse or snuggle Ds down every night.  He then spends anywhere from 4-6 hours in his crib before waking up to eat and remaining in our bed for the night.  Several days each of the past few weeks, he has woken up within a half hour of when I get up for work (5:15am) and won't go back to sleep unless I lay with him.  He will lay there and cry with DH but rarely goes back to sleep without me.

He has also started taking naps that are 30-60 minutes, which isn't very long.  He never gets more than 1.5 hours worth of naps a day, normally less.  However, I nap with him sometimes during the weekend and he can nap for 2 hrs. at a time.  He also usually sleeps until 7:00am with me on weekends.  I am starting to worry that he is no longer able to sleep independently, he needs me.

This morning it occurred to me that instead of that, it might be separation anxiety.  Over the past few weeks, he has started crying when I leave the room, leave for work, even just turn my back to him.  I also wonder if it has to do with trying to move him to the crib more often but we haven't pushed that and he always spends plenty of time in our bed.

DH feels this is all the more reason we need to get him in his crib all night.  I don't want him in his crib all night (we are still figuring everything out) but it isn't healthy for him to not be able to sleep well without me, he needs his sleep.

Your opinions?  Separation anxiety?  Too reliant on me?  A stage?  He is teething and needs more comfort right now?  Other ideas?

pixiedustie

I was going to write a very similar post this morning.  My DD has slept in her crib since day one.  Recently with teething she has woken up multiple times at night and I just brought her back to bed with me.  Now I have a terrible time getting her to sleep unless she is physically touching me, meaning snuggled into my chest. 

I hope you get some good suggestions.  I really sleep horribly with her in bed with me, it makes me nervous, but I won't let her cry so I don't know what other options there are.

So good luck and I am gonna piggy back off your post!

moroccojade

Yes, it is probably a bit of separation anxiety. Is he reliant on you?  Of course!  You're his mom.  No one/nothing in the world is better to a baby than a good mama.  Is he too reliant?  No. This is just how it goes. 

It is, of course, a stage.  What he's doing at 9 months is different than what he'll be doing 19 months.  And 9 years.  etc etc.   

Do you have to force him to stay in his crib all night?  If you want to.  We had a 5 am rule for our sanity at that time.  If she woke up I'd sooth her back to sleep while not taking her out of the crib.  The first couple of nights it took a fair amount of time.  But it soon took less and less.  Then she started sleeping through quite well.  

Teething?  Could be.  DD never had a problem with cutting teeth, so I'm not the expert on that.  (Teeth would just show up with no warning.)

One thing I do know for sure is these little ones have so many ups and downs with sleep over their early lives  it's not even funny.  Once you have one issue mastered - another issue will come up to challenge you.  At least it's usually something different than last time! 

 

So define what YOU truly think needs to happen for you guys.  Then take small steps to make it happen.  Don't make any changes that you aren't comfortable with/don't feel are absolutely necessary.  

webMistress0609

I've read that 8-10 months is a peak time for separation anxiety. Can't remember where, but I believe it was an article about sleep training & it was discussing how sleep training at that age can be very traumatic b/c of the peak.

I'm thinking it definitely is separation anxiety. Ari goes through spurts of this too. We bedshare full time, but he usually goes to bed at least an hour or two before us. Some nights he stays in our bed w/o a peep, some nights he is up every 30 minutes until I finally come to bed. Naps are the same way. I don't have any advice, but I have plenty of empathy.  

SeaSoul

this sounds just like my ds!!  however, i think the fact that they both sleep in their cribs for 4-6 hours at the beginning of the night is a good thing.  and i think the attachment is just a phase...i don't think it's going to go on like that forever.  also, if i'm not home DH is able to get him to sleep...it's just if i am there and he knows it that he prefers me.  teething certainly adds to the mix, too.