2nd Trimester
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vent (long. just need to get this off my chest)

I am frustrated. My big ultrasound is on Tuesday and none of my family will be there. I wasn't expecting any of them in the first place because they were all going to be in Mexico, but my brother came back and was gonna come. But not anymore, and here is why. So he promised his late wife that he would take care of her sister (15 years old) because her mom is pretty whacked and not really all there mentally. So he gets an email from the sister today, just an update on what's been happening in her life. The gist of it was that she is dating this older guy that she doesn't like, and every time he is with her, he tries to get his hands down her pants or up her shirt. She is 15 and he is at least 19. And in our religion you don't have premarital sex or anything like that. Anyways... Her mom is gonna be out of town this week, and the sisters boyfriend is coming over, but he is bringing his buddy... So they aren't alone. The sister really wants to break up with this guy, but she doesn't want to hurt his feelings. (on a side note, this boyfriends family is completely effed up. The little brother and sister were having sex before social services found out) So my brother, being the protective guy that he is, is furious. Which I understand. I told him to pick her up and bring her here for a days... But that won't happen. I don't know what my brother is planning on accomplishing with being there. He wants to protect her, that's normal, she is just the kind of person that gets into bad situations all the time, because she doesn't want a confrontation. I don't really have a point to this... I just needed to get it off my chest. I'm so sad that none of my family is with me... I'm not close to Red's family and we moved to his home town.. So I know no one. I am not mad with my brother for leaving to help her out. I hope things go okay. Okay I'm done now. Thanks for listening. :)
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Re: vent (long. just need to get this off my chest)

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    Will your husband not be there?

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    I'm curious why you need your family there with you for an u/s?  I think your brother going to be with the 15 yr old girl is a GOOD idea...something really bad could happen to her.
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    Sorry no one will be there with you.  I know I'd be a bit down if I had to go alone too.

    I really hope everything goes well tomorrow for the sister.  I don'tknow about you but I'd feel way better knowing your bro will be there with her than her, the jerk she's dating & his guy friend!  Who knows what could have happened to her (not to spark bad thoughts but it's just the worry side of me!).  Hopefully he can help support her when she tells the guy to buzz off & make sure the guy & his buddy leave.

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    I would be FAR more upset about the family situation than the US situation.  Sounds like that kid is in a bad place and needs all the help she can get.
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    I am sorry you are disappointed, but most people don't have their families for an u/s.  I hope your husband can make it, it seems that would be the person to go.  As far as him taking care of his SIL, it does sound like she needs his presence, so good for him for protecting her!  We called our family members after, and that was fun; I hope you find a way to be happy about the outcome.
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    i can see how this can bother you. it would be nice to share the excitement in what you see during the US,  with someone else, other than the tech. but everything happens for a reason. if you go it alone, make the best of it.. Smile and just smile..
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    Its not really the ultrasound I care about... It is more the fact that my family isn't around, and I don't really know how to deal with that. We are really close. The big ultrasound is the one thing that I could share with part of my family. I'm not upset for my brother going to help his late wive's sister. I would be more upset if he didn't go! Her family has been thru so much, and whatever COULD happen with that guy... Just makes me angry thinking about the possibilities.
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    Um, I'd be more concerned about your brother's SIL. That is some crazy, serious stuff going on and I'd put my ultrasound on the backburner to make sure that a minor is safe. Yes, it sucks being away from family, and I know this all to well as I can't see anyone in my family without getting on a plane. But that's what phone calls, email, text messages, mail, etc. is for. They'll still be excited.
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    I am glad that my brother is helping out his sister in law. I wouldn't expect anything less from him! Don't get me wrong. :) I was just hoping to "share the excitement in what you see during the US" with someone in my family. Red will be there, and his parents. I am grateful for that.
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    imagePMeg819:
    Um, I'd be more concerned about your brother's SIL. That is some crazy, serious stuff going on and I'd put my ultrasound on the backburner to make sure that a minor is safe. Yes, it sucks being away from family, and I know this all to well as I can't see anyone in my family without getting on a plane. But that's what phone calls, email, text messages, mail, etc. is for. They'll still be excited.

     

    Ditto.

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    you're allowed to have other people at your ultrasound???   

    even DH wasn't allowed in until the last 5 minutes or so.

     

    i would definitely be more worried about the 15yo though!!! i hope she gets the help she needs. 

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    imageSailorPink:

    you're allowed to have other people at your ultrasound???   

    even DH wasn't allowed in until the last 5 minutes or so.

     

    i would definitely be more worried about the 15yo though!!! i hope she gets the help she needs. 

     

    why did they not allow DH in? Is he kicked out of other appointments, too?

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    I had prepared myself for not having any family around during my pregnancy, and then my brother decides to come back early, so I got excited about that... And its not like I can even be mad that he is not going to be here... Because he is gone for a good reason.
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    I think your brother is doing the right thing, and what he can do is tell this guy to bugger off or he is going to call the cops on his ass for attempted rape! I dont know what the age of consent is in your state but regardless she is not consenting and he (who is a legal adult) is not accepting that reality. THIS IS A PROBLEM!!!!!!

     

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    I am a little confused, why is the guy coming over to the SIL's house, if she doesn't want to date him?  I am sure you kind of explained when you said her mom is effed up and the girl let's things happen because she does not like confrontation.  But....  I think it is a very good idea that your bro goes over there. 

    I know you want your family to be with you at the u/s but at least your DH and his parents will be and you don't have to go alone. 

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    But you won't be alone, you will have your baby with you!! haha, corny I know but when my hubby leaves me home alone for a week to go hunting, I cheer myself up with that thought!  : )

    Good Luck!

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    thanks everyone. I am glad i have such an good brother. haha. i am going to skype my family tomorrow after the ultrasound. At least i can see their faces. :)
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