Your oldest around the newborn

alaskajamaica

God bless his heart, my DS I think is very protective of his Little sister and he is just 19 months old.

My issue is that he wants to push her in the swing- REALLY HARD

He wants to shove the pacifier in her mouth- REALLY HARD

and the list goes on and on.  It's rather cute sometimes that he wants to help so much.  When she cries, he makes sure we know about it.

We are trying to teach him gentle and we let him give her a kiss w/supervision. 

I feel like I am saying "don't touch the swing" or whatever it is that deals with her 15 million times  a day.  I just don't want her to get hurt, but I know he is trying to help.  ((sigh))

shouldbworkin

well, you definitely don't want to be yelling at him every time he goes near the baby. That won't be good long term.

The truth is, babies are pretty resilient, so try to let it go a bit.  If he wants to spend time with the baby, give him an opportunity to do so with supervision.  Also, do plenty of demonstrating what gentle means to him.  I used to always stroke my DC's arm gently when I asked him to be gentle if s/he was being too rough.  It helped show them what the word meant and give them some context.

lilone_06

It is tiring, huh?

I agree w PP.  Try to limit the amount of admonishments - only when absolutely crucial.  I stick to: don't touch her face/head, don't break swing/glider.  That's about it, everything else is fair game.  It's sweet, because of course they mean well, but I guess this is life with a toddler and newborn, huh?

JARbaby

Let him be unless it really is hurting the baby. Encourage him to sit in your lap and hold the baby, lots of contact and never limit it.

cotner

We had the same issue.  I finally let DD put her stuffed monkey (her most prized possesion) in the swing when DS was not in there.  I told her that the swing was for DS, but her monkey could play in it whenever he didn't need it.  She would push it, cover it with blankets and it seemed to satisfy her.  She pretty much left DS alone when he was in it. 

I've found that letting her do things to her monkey that we do to DS very helpful.  She feeds him when I feed DS, changes him when I change him, and is always putting him to sleep.  Good Luck!

johnsoar

I think your situation is pretty common.  DD loves her brother but is too rough with him.  She loves bouncing the bouncy chair, swinging the swing, putting in his paci... But she don't do it gently.  I find myself saying be gentle a lot.

Cyrbia

I try not to say "don't". Instead I tell him what he can do. You know, like can you go get Mckenna's (fill in the blank) or I say "do you want to hold her hand?" or, "you can touch her feet". This seems to work ok.

Now if only I could get him to stop shaking her Pack n Play just as she falls asleep...sigh.