Does your DH get it?

econgirlmanda

I've been feeling really frustrated with the TTC process lately and my DH is no help.  He wants to get pregnant, but I just don't feel he's as invested as I am.  I'm the one temping every morning, checking CM, reading things on the internet, making doctor appointments, and ultimately the one who feels the let down of AF when it comes.  He is slightly bummed when it happens, but it doesn't seem be the devistating event for him like it is for me.

 Anyone else have a similar situation?  Any advice?

amberleeb

I had my 1st breakdown last night.  He wants a baby bad but is not worried.  He say it will happen don't worry.  I fell so bad because it is the problem with my body and not his.

AmyeJean

My DH does but we have also been trying for over 5 years.

I had to sit him down and tell him what I am going thru and this is the ways to increase our odds by him being stressed and depressed about it not happeneing is not helping my mood. So now he is very involved.

angiewolf03

He may be like my DH.  I take 6 pills a day, do daily shots of lovenox, plus O monitoring daily, in addition to about 7 drs appts per month.  I felt like I was doing so much work and that it was on my mind 24/7 and then when AF comes, i'm in a depression for a couple days.  But he didn't react at all.  Finally I asked him about all of it and he broke down.  He said he feels the same as I do but has been trying to be strong for me, so he doesn't show his disappointment.  Have you talked to him about it?

nursjen

They are men.  They dont understand like we do.  Same goes for when you are pregnant and even when you are parents.  It is so hard because we get very emotionally invested....it is all happening to US.  Just remember that he loves you and you are in this together, wether or not he seems to care about the details.  

Atalanta0214

My DH tries so hard to be supportive but he really just does not get it either.  Everyone in his family is so freaking fertile so he doesn't see that this road can be very long.  He just keeps saying, "Don't worry... it will happen for us."  This last doctor's appointment really brought me down and DH tried to empathize but fell short when he said, "Don't be sad... or I'll have to get a cardboard baby like they did in Sex in the City."  Nice joke... Only made me start crying...

I think because we are reminded every day about the journey (temping, checking CM, AF, etc) it's easier to be wrapped up in it. They can almost forget about it until AF comes.  However, if he is bummed about AF, don't discount his feelings.  He might be more sad than he admits and just trying to be strong for you.

waitwhat

Men are just wired differently.  I used to freak out when DH wasn't feeling the exact same way as I was but I realized that it's ok for us to have different opinions so long as we're communicating and can both agree on major decisions.  Hang in there.

teri_625

Well mine has this whole attitude of when it happens, it happens. He doesn't seem to be on the same page as me because I've asked him before, and he told me he doesn't like the whole planning part of having a baby, that he just wants it to happen when it feels ready to happen. However, I have endometriosis, and we've been trying to 7 cycles now(I am currently coming up on ovulation for my 8th cycle), and my gyno thinks it'd be a good idea to go visit a RE now instead of waiting farther down the road. It's truly frustrating. Luckily my best friend is like my partner in crime in all this. She gets excited for me when I feel symptoms, and then just as disappointed when AF shows up. Sometimes you just have to look elsewhere for support since most men just don't get it, and the women who have men who do get it are lucky!