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Pregnant after 35
Hoping for Encouragement....
Just wondering how impossible it is to get pg after 35 w/o fertility treatments? I went to my pre-conception appointment and all I heard from the Dr. was that it will be very tough at my "advanced maternal age". It was depressing!
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Re: Hoping for Encouragement....
Hi there!
I hate when doctor's throw that out right away. My Dr. never mentioned AMA to me. He just said more and more women are getting pg in their mid to late 30's and into 40's. Every situation is unique.
It took us 14 months to get PG. After a year of ttc we had all the testing done and all came back normal. Then bam...month 14 I was pregnant. We didn't do fertility treatments.
There are plenty of AMA women who get pg within 6 months and plenty who need fertility treatments.
Good luck and don't get discouraged! There are lots of us out there!
I haven't had any fertility treatments. This is my 2nd pregnancy (lost first one) in two years. I'm 37. It definitely can happen.
I would really encourage you to seek out another doctor. Mine has never once mentioned my age or weight (was fat pre-pg) having a negative impact on my chances at conceiving.
Don't give up hope!!
click the pic (blog)
I definitely agree with what everyone else has said.
I will be 39 next week and got pg a month after my wedding this past May.
I have 2 children from a previous marriage and even after a lot of previous fertility issues was able to get pregnant with no help. It was a shock. I'm more fertile now than I was in my 20s.
GL to you!!
*on average* our fertility goes down with age. This is true. But every woman is different. Some women won't have a problem and others will not be able to get pregnant without help. The best thing to do is to take it one step at a time. My husband and I conceived in the 6th month of trying, a few months shy of my 40th birthday.
It is true that the clock is ticking, so my suggestion is to monitor for ovulation and make sure that you have sex during those times to maximize your chances of conceiving (rather than just going off birth control). If you don't conceive within 6 months, and you are over 35, then it wouldn't hurt to consult an RE.
But your doctor has a skewed perception, probably because a lot of the people he does see are coming to see him *because* they have problems conceiving.
I asked the NMW about the possibility of conceiving after 35 a couple of years ago during a routine well woman exam. She said not to worry until there is something to worry about! She had her first child at 39, the other NMW at the practice had her first at 38. Basically, you try for awhile and if nothing happens, then you go for testing to find out if there are any issues.
I'm 37 and we were successful after only 4 cycles (and the first cycle was badly timed, and probably doesn't count!) We had no idea if we could conceive, we just went into it with a positive, let's-have-fun attitude, and decided that if we didn't get pregnant after about 6-8 months, we'd seek help. Luckily, that didn't happen.
Basically, unless you know from having previously diagnosed issues (PCOS, cancer, etc.) or DH has issues, then the best is just to assume the best and try for 6 months, and seek help if it doesn't work. And find doctors who are POSITIVE, but realistic...ones who believe in finding out what's wrong and doing whatever it takes (if you want to/can afford it) to make it happen.
I got pregnant the third month of "trying". I had a miscarriage (which is not age related) and then got pregnant three months after my miscarriage. I am 37. My doctor NEVER talks about my age being a factor except this last appointment when she said I would get an extra ultrasound to be sure everything was progressing nicely. I guess the advantage of AMA are more pics of my baby!!!
Good luck to you, don't stress about it, relax and enjoy time with your DH. If things don't happen to progress for you, there are lots of options out there with lots of successes!
My DH and I got pregnant on the first try (2 weeks after our wedding!). I am 38 now, but was 37 then - him, 38 then and 39 now.
You'll find both ends of the spectrum on here. I have to say I don't care for your doctor's attitude, though....
Honestly, I would think about finding a new doctor. You are only 35 and unless you have some condition you didn't reference I think you doctor is being discouraging and pessimistic.
To answer your question, I got pregnant the first month of trying at age 35. I got pregnant again when he was about 7 months old (and also breastfeeding), but lost the baby to a miscarriage. I got pregnant again the following month and carried to term. I was 37 when my second was born. I got pregnant when with this baby when my second was 12 months old (again also breastfeeding) and will be 38 when I deliver.
So that is three babies in three years -- all after the age of 35.
Another KY girl here! I would definitely find another doctor! I got pregnant at 39 without trying at all. At my first appointment, I asked to see the high risk specialist because I had heard horror stories from so many people about being AMA. She put my mind at ease immediately and told me unless I had some underlying medical condition, there was no reason for me to have anything to be concerned with. Here I am at 38 weeks, and aside from some wicked carpal tunnel that sprang up last week, my entire pregnancy has been so great.
Good luck to you!!!! This is a great board to get info from
It is not impossible at all. Is is only telling you it will be hard due to AMA or because you have some underlying medical condition?
I was pregnant 3 times in 2008. Granted, they were all m/c but the losses had nothing to do with AMA. I would have had these losses at 20 yrs old. I obviously not NO problem getting pregnant. Mine problem was staying pregnant.
I was pregnant again in April 2009 and am closing in on 32 weeks right now.
There are plenty of women who can conceive naturally after the age of 35. I went off the pill in May of this year and conceived 3 months later with my 1st. I was 39 at the time (now 40) and everything is going wonderfully. I read that if you are 35 or over and have trouble conceiving after 6 months you should go see your doctor. I also didn't have a pre-conception appointment because I pretty much knew what was going to be said. Hubby and I decided to just dive right in.
Don't be discouraged. Maybe you just need to find a more encouraging doctor.
Good luck with everything!
Wow, that's too bad on your doctor's part.
Don't get me wrong, I think it would be somewhat remidd of your doctor not to warn you that it might be a little more difficult than it would have been when you were 21 because it's a biological fact that overall odds decrease, but barring any underlying conditions, there is NO reason you cannot get pregnant FAST!
I personally think a lot of the "overall odds decreasing" in women >35 is brought about by women who experience early menopause and the like. If that's not your case, I think you'll do just great.
I'd have a heart to heart with the doc to see if his/her philosophy on AMA childbirth meshes with yours overall. if not, I'd find a new doc who will support you AND give you honest answers because both are equally important
I have not had any problems. I was 35/36 with my first PG and got PG 1st time trying. This PG I am 38 and was PG 2mo trying. Unless you have had issues in the past that might make things difficult then think postively - there are plenty of us out here that did it naturally without the need for fertility treatment.
Good luck to you.
It took us three years before we got a very surprise BFP at 37. Now that I have some perspective, I think that it may have taken that long to get the depo provera out of my system rather than it being a true fertility or age related problem. There are non-invasive tests that your OB can run to ensure that you are not pre-menopausal, but in general, although age can make it a bit more challenging, it isn't always the case.
In fact, a couple of weeks ago, I brought up my age as a high risk factor (I have a couple of other high risk factors in this pregnancy), and my doctor was quick to point out that "you're ALL over 35 these days. I don't get a lot of 20 somethings in here anymore. They are the exception, and the over 35 group is the rule, so don't worry about that" I have to say, I like her attitude
I'm 42 and we'd been "flying without a net" for about 4 years before this baby stuck. No drugs or IVF or anything. But we had just started to think about talking about adoption.. and BAM!
In the months I've been around here, it seems the ladies who have High Risk OBs rather than "regular" OBs have a lot less aggravation with their docs. Mine never mentions my age and, in fact, has said my pregnancy is pretty smooth compared to most of her other clients who are probably much younger than me. Plus, being older, I'm much less of a PITA!
We got married in February and I was pregnant in May, no treatments or testing. I just turned 42 about two weeks ago.
My Blog
Well, it took 2 years of trying, 7 months of charting and another 3 months and I got pregnant at 34. My original doctor said that she "didn't think I was ovulating" and I should just consider IVF! She didn't suggest ANYTHING else - acupuncture, yoga, visualization ,etc. Now I realize that alternative medicines do not always work, but I figure if they don't hurt you then why not try it?
LSS, we did not carry to term. I would have been due Sept. 24.
Well, I ended up getting pregnant again (yay!). This second time around, it took about 3 months. I am now 35.
Ok, I realize that this sounds completely nutty and crazy, but I swear by this tea called Female Toner by Traditional Medicinals. Supposedly, it helps regulate your cycles. My cycles are really irregular. I think all of that charting just stressed me out. After drinking 2 cups of the tea a day for 3 months, I was able to get pregnant twice. When I showed it to my Dr. she looked at the ingredients and said the worst that will happen is that I will drink a lot of tea.
As you've realized my pg brain is wandering. I don't think it is impossible to get pg after 35 without IVF. However, I think the stress of trying to get pregnant or worrying about getting pregnant does not help matters. Lastly, I think your Dr. may be biased.
Good luck!
Megan
I had my first child at 34 after getting PG within 6 weeks of stopping birth control pills that I'd been on for over 13 years. I just got PG again on my first PP cycle, while breastfeednig DD. I will be 36 when I have number 2.
35 isn't a magical number--rather your fertility is declining as the years go by, and there's no denying that you are not as fertile as you were at 25.
Because of my age, I didn't want to waste time, so I bought the Clear Blue Easy Fertility Monitor before trying for #1. I have now conceived two children and have not purchased more than the original box of 30 sticks! I would say that if you're worried then get to know your cycle by charting and see a doctor if you haven't conceived in 6 months. Absent any underlying medical issues, everything should be just fine!