does your toddler actually hurt your feelings?

melmax

Because mine does, when she's out-and-out mean.

I was sitting on the floor nursing the baby, when her hand got stuck in my hair...but instead of just letting go, she proceeded to just yank and yank and yank. I asked her three time to stop pulling my hair (it f'n hurts!) and she would not. Not only did I get so mad, but I also want to cry.

I'm so good to that child and she can be so mean to me.

belle204

Not really anymore. I've kind of grown a thick skin to it b/c I know most times she doesn't mean it or understand. I don't think she's at the point to be blatantly mean or hurtful. I just try to use it as a chance to teach her why that particular action or behavior is not ok ... sometimes easier said than done. I know hair pulling hurts like a mofo. Sorry. Hang in there. It's a rough age.

Is it poss. she wants attention with the baby being here now?

firefightersgal

Not yet.  I haven't let her hurt my feelings, though.  Sometimes when I tell her I love her, she says, "No, Mommy.  I love Daddy."  I just tell her that I know she loves Daddy, but I know she loves me, too.  Or, sometimes she even says she doesn't love me.  To that, I say, "Oh, yes you do."

I hope I can still  react (or not react) like this when she's a teenager!

NSL

No, I don't let him hurt my feelings.  He's too little to really understand that other people have feelings, and while he can really push my buttons I know that it's not done out of malice, but rather out of a need to explore my boundaries. 

Andrewsgal

No, she is not doing things to hurt me, she is doing things to test me and see my reaction. She is doing things so she can see that I will set limits and create a safe environment for her. I do tell her that sometimes her actions make me sad, and sometimes they do, but she never truly hurts my feelings. I know what she is doing it totally age appropriate and her way of testing her boundries.

stcroixbride

last night I was ready to just throw in the towel because she threw a gingantic hissy fit about needing daddy and NOT me to take her to the bathroom.  she then hit me and refused to go potty until daddy came down.  this was after she had smacked me several times and kicked me yesterday because she wanted daddy instead of me.

does it really hurt my feelings?  not long term, but it sure is demoralizing sometimes to hear how much better daddy is at everything when YOU are the only one she's got @90% of the time

we have a really bizarre situation though, with daddy in school or studying out of the house A LOT.  she has always been a daddy's girl, but the problem got worse after I went PT last summer just after she turned 2, and she realized EXACTLY how little daddy was actually home.  It is hard for DH to not reinforce this, too, because he gets so little time with her and just wants her to be happy with him.  I am the one who has to do most of the discipline (not that he won't do it, he just is rarely around when she acts up).

she is fickle though - she apparently begged for me when daddy was reading her stories and putting her to bed.  I just had to laugh.

Expecting0207

No but she knows how to push my buttons and totally get me into a frenzy!

adri77

yeah, a few months ago, my stepmom brought DS1 back after having him for 3 days.  (and he was alone, DS2 was with me) and he CRIED when she walked him into our front door, wailing "I just don't want to be at my house, OK?  I want to go back to grandmom's"  I was so excited to see him, and then he was so unhappy to come home that I just wanted to cry!!!!

Zenya

NSL:

No, I don't let him hurt my feelings.  He's too little to really understand that other people have feelings, and while he can really push my buttons I know that it's not done out of malice, but rather out of a need to explore my boundaries. 

exactly