Anyone not want visitors to the hospital?

CanadianGurl

Two of my cousins have had babies this past week, and invited EVERYONE to the hospital to see the baby. It's got me feeling like I was a bit of a grinch when I had DS. Maybe because we had a preemie. But honestly, before we even knew he was coming early, the only one I wanted at the hospital before, during, and after delivery, for the whole hospital stay was DH. If it wasn't so "rude" not to invite our parents to see DS after he was born, I would have loved to have them all just wait till we get home. However long that takes. And I feel the same way for when we have another baby, even if its full term. I like my privacy, space, time alone with DH and DC during this intimate time. It drove me nuts when every extended relative dropped in to see me when I was on 1 week of hospital bedrest before DS's delivery, even though they have good intentions. I mean, I'm sitting there in a hospital gown about the thickness of a cheap sheet having contractions every 10 minutes for 24 hours for over a week. Trying not to move as the contractions were brought on every time I so much as sat up. And they all want to lean in for a hug?! Haha....I sound worse than I mean to. It just doesn't seem like a time I want to share with the rest of the world.

 Anyone else feel this way?

clyoungsey

With the first we were very much into our own space and such, everyone was there, but waited till the baby was born to see us.  The second (our little preemie) came surprisingly but for me it was great to see my MIL and SIL who were coming to visit me on hospital bedrest and just happened to be on there way to the hospital when I went to deliver. 

Once he was in the NICU no one visited unless I or my DH was there, and even then it was only very close family.  Other than that, two of my friends who had been there for me during my bedrest (5weeks) also came to see him.  No one held him besides DH, me, and MIL/SIL.

Both of my deliveries ended up being c/s, so it is a little different than laboring and having someone there in the room with you.

TripMomma

When the triplets came we, though it was really just me but DH backed me up, did not allow anyone to see them for the first 5-7 days. I wanted them to be stable and doing well in the NICU before anyone saw them...I also wanted time to bond with them before anyone else came. We also did not allow anyone to hold them until they came home from the NICU, which was about a month after they were born.

mcdev

I really didn't want any visitors either.  Just immediate family and a couple close friends.  My emotions were changing by the second (both births were premature) and I didn't feel like the obligation of putting on a happy face if I didn't want it.  Plus with DD #2 I had previously been on so many drugs to stop labor that all I wanted to do was SLEEP.  I was so out of it.  I barely remember a thing.  As for guests in the NICU....we kept it at only our parents and siblings.  We just told everyone else that the doctors said they weren't allowed.  

southphilly

I'm kind of a tyrant.  My mom has only met the baby once.  My mil twice.  I don't think of the nicu as a nursery, but as intensive care/operating room-visiting seems off somehow to me with babies constantly in critical situations.   and i totally understand just wanting it to be you and dh-there will be plenty of time for others later!

Sweets2005

I did not want any visitors. Just my immediate family, but I didn't want DHs lol. Everyone was very pushy to come meet the babies but I didn't want people disturbing them. Also, when I was there it was to see my babies and I was busy when I was there either holding them or pumping, and later nursing. And since we did kangaroo care in the beginning that meant me with no shirt on almost lol (well, you know what I mean). And people wanted to hold them but my holding time was limited enough. DHs family came when they were 2 days old and his stupid mom barely looked at them before going in on a pity party about her stupid dying cat and she was going on so much that DS started to destat due to the noise and we all got kicked out. He was on the vent that night. I was VERY protective over who got to come and when.

kellr105

When Hanna was in the NICU we really limited the visitors.  My parents and MIL were frequent visitors.  I didn't have the heart to tell them no.  We didn't really allow many others. 

There is one night in particular that I remember so well.  We were at my parents for dinner before going up to the hospital to feed the baby at 8.  Many family members arrived with the expectation that they were going to accompany us.  I had a semi-private meltdown.  My DH and Mom didn't know what to think because I had been so "strong" thus far.  My Mom pulled some of the family members aside and explained that they couldn't go up and that they would eventually see her.  I was grateful for her support.  This is the first preemie in our family and while everyone was concerned they just didn't know who to handle it.

FutureMrsCuoghi

You're not alone!  Preemies or not, I still wanted to be alone with DH after the delivery.  I wanted time to unwind, take everything in, and have "family time".  And I want the same thing with our next baby.  Unfortunately DH's ENTIRE family was in the waiting room after my c-section.  I told the nurses that I didn't want to see anyone until I was ready.  I made everyone wait there for over an hour until I felt ok to let everyone in.